I am really struggling.
I've always struggled, but in the last 24 hours doubt crept in.
I don't like this side of me. AT ALL.
I don't like the tears. Wondering if Im giving up my best years for something that will fizzle.
I'm scared.
I'm in love with him - but have no assurance of equally returned affection.
NONE.
I know his experiences leave him less able to connect emotionally.
I just need a sign.
Can I do this for 4 more years?
My weakness right now makes me worry that I don't have the strength for this.
It's still early. Not quite a year together.
I don't like myself this way.
Scared, weepy, and last night jealousy smacked me in the face.
Im not a jealous person. Or maybe I am.
I'm taking the time to seriously contemplate this.
Am I settling? Or sacrificing?
Please. Words of wisdom? Experience?
Just a quote that gets you through will help.
I love this man. I don't want to walk away from something good with the potential to be better down the road.
But I worry - and I feel like Im too close. Im exposed and raw.
And Im hiding these feelings from him.
Because he perceives it as insecurity and weakness.
The only person who can reassure me completely is him.
And that's not happening.
Im rambling.
So please. Can you offer me a little bit of something that helped you in hard times?
I've always struggled, but in the last 24 hours doubt crept in.
I don't like this side of me. AT ALL.
I don't like the tears. Wondering if Im giving up my best years for something that will fizzle.
I'm scared.
I'm in love with him - but have no assurance of equally returned affection.
NONE.
I know his experiences leave him less able to connect emotionally.
I just need a sign.
Can I do this for 4 more years?
My weakness right now makes me worry that I don't have the strength for this.
It's still early. Not quite a year together.
I don't like myself this way.
Scared, weepy, and last night jealousy smacked me in the face.
Im not a jealous person. Or maybe I am.
I'm taking the time to seriously contemplate this.
Am I settling? Or sacrificing?
Please. Words of wisdom? Experience?
Just a quote that gets you through will help.
I love this man. I don't want to walk away from something good with the potential to be better down the road.
But I worry - and I feel like Im too close. Im exposed and raw.
And Im hiding these feelings from him.
Because he perceives it as insecurity and weakness.
The only person who can reassure me completely is him.
And that's not happening.
Im rambling.
So please. Can you offer me a little bit of something that helped you in hard times?
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