How do we tell our parents?

[garrett]

I started a long distance relationship dec 25 2011, I knew her for four months before we started dating. We met on habbo, it's a social game. Neither of us have told our parents, we're both extremely scared they wont accept it. My mother is worried about my social life, if i tell her that i have a "internet girlfriend" (quotes because that's what my mom would call it)she wouldn't accept it. It saddens me because i really love kendra (girlfriend). During the summer i want to go to canada and finally meet her, but of course i have to tell my parents first. We are both going to college next year and idk what to do. I want to move to canada but idk how i'll support myself. Any advice?

[Camp_Counciler_ES64]

Well, I had a hard time telling my Parents as well, My advice would be to just be truthful. if your 17 and Going to college next year chances are your turning 18 soon so you really Don't have to Justify your decisions to anyone but, I would let your parent know that you would appreciate it if they would respect your decision to be involved in a LDR and that you would really like to have their support in what ever you decid to do.( If that what you Want) That seemed to work for me. As for wanting to move to Canada. I would say Take a trip there first the decide also RESEARCH is your friend. Talk to your Girlfriend about Life there, Ask other people who live/Have lived in Canada, and Ask people who have Visited Canada. Tal to a Variety of people from a variety of backgrounds because what works for one person may not work for you.

If you would like I could Possibly Get you in contact with a friend of mine that lives in Manitoba as well. LMK

Hope this helps. Good Luck!

[garrett]

I'd love to talk to your friend and also how did your parents react to your ldr?

[Sora1101]

3 years into my LDR and I still haven't told my parents, I know that they would take away all my means of communicating with my SO and honestly I'd rather lie and hide it than risk losing contact with my SO. It's up to you if you want to tell your parents but if you think it'll ruin your relationship then I think you're old enough to make that decision on your own as long as you're responsible enough to deal with any consequences.

[Camp_Counciler_ES64]

My Parents Reacted alright My mom got all Mom on me and My Dad was just Worried about me keeping my Grades up.
My situation Is a little different though The only Reason Its a LDR is I'm away at College When I'm Home We're only a 10 min. Drive from Each other.
So that Helped. and I'm 19 and my SO is 17 Turning 18 so They Really Couldn't "Forbid me" from seeing her because I'm Legally an adult.
But she(my SO) is in the Same Situation as you she is afraid What Her Parents will think but for her its the 2 Year Age Difference she's worried about.

Let me Just Make Sure my Friend is Okay with me releasing her Information then Ill PM you with Her Response(Hopefully Containing her Contact Information.)

[Alsfia]

But she(my SO) is in the Same Situation as you she is afraid What Her Parents will think but for her its the 2 Year Age Difference she's worried about.

Two years is NOTHING! It's two years between my SO and me as well, me being the older one, and the only problem we've ever had has been with some immature people younger than either of us.

My mother is worried about my social life, if i tell her that i have a "internet girlfriend" (quotes because that's what my mom would call it)she wouldn't accept it.

My mum is the same, occationally she (more or less) kicks me out to go out with my friends... In any case, I thought she'd react like that as well, and before she met my SO (which if you read one of my old posts took a bit of thinking) she didn't like it at all but now she loves him. Point being, you can never really tell how anyone will react to you being in an LDR (it might have helped for me being "friends" first) and the only way to tell is to tell them about your decision.
Good luck, all the best for you and your girlfriend

[Ciana]

Lol Just wanted to point out something about the age difference- I agree, two years is only a big deal when you are very young. Who cares about it in the long run? My SO and I are two years apart and I turn 18 a week after he turns 20. Don't sweat it, kid It is no deal to you and that is all that should matter.

[CountryGirl]

My parents were okay with me being a long distance relationship.. at first my dad was a bit apprehensive but I introduced my SO to my dad over Skype and once my dad saw that he was actually a young lad and not an old geezer he was happy for me (: My SOs parents were the ones who were a bit reluctant at first but they got over it and were fine up until my SO and I got married..after that they changed and have been trying for us to get a divorce since. Things are a bit rocky now but it's all worth it in the end. I'd say though about moving to Canada, definitely check it out first and look into all the visa stuff necessary. It's even tricky when you want to be a student. Good luck and I hope everything works out for you!

[Sora1101]

but for her its the 2 Year Age Difference she's worried about.

Psha, tell her not to worry, I met my SO when I was 15 and we have a 5 year age difference, now that was a big deal when I wasn't a legal adult but two years? Totally nothing especially when she'll be turning 18.

[Camp_Counciler_ES64]

Psha, tell her not to worry, I met my SO when I was 15 and we have a 5 year age difference, now that was a big deal when I wasn't a legal adult but two years? Totally nothing especially when she'll be turning 18.

Its The 2 years specifically I'm turning 20 this weekend and she is still 17 Until late March. Even then it is more the I'm an Adult and she well... is not.
But, We have decided that In march the weekend after her Birthday, I will be driving home for her to Introduce her parents to me ( it going to be funny because I have actually Briefly meet them before at Camp, so it shouldn't be too bad) and her dad dosent own a Gun so I dont have to worry about that either.

To the OP: sorry, My Canadian Friend wishes you the best of luck but she would wish to remain Anonymous. She did say however that she is Planning on moving to the States if that is any indication on her preference as to where to live.

[wellcouldihavealongername]

I have a similar dilemma. I've been in a LDR before, and when I broke the news to my parents about that one, they freaked out completely. They limited my internet access, started monitoring my computer, and constantly reminded me of their disappointment. It was awkward and stressful, and ultimately it ended our relationship.

So you can understand my reluctance to tell my parents I've been in a second LDR for over a year...

On the other hand, my SO told his parents about us outright. They didn't disapprove much (other than the fact I'm so far away) and they're happy, because he's happy with me. They've even paid for him to send cards and gifts to me!

I guess what I'm trying to show, is that some parents will be more open minded about it than others.

[Mellow]

Mhnm, indeed. Some parents would accept it more easily then others. But that also goes for relationships that aren't combined with a long distance. Some parents feel a bit anxious about their kid that actually starts dating... Understandable, sometimes a bit bothersome though.

My parents wouldn't mind the distance. I think they've always expected me to go a bit more international. Just not the way I met my SO... I'm afraid that the reaction to that wouldn't be as good. I don't know.... On the other hand, being 18 is officially grown up here, so I suppose they don't have anything to say about my life... Or less. It stays family.

I think the best is trying to tell the parents very carefully. With a cup of tea or coffee... Maybe warn them before hand "Mom, I have to tell you something". Sounds like you're pregnant/announcing a pregnancy, but I guess parents wouldn't mind a relationship that much compared to a teenage pregnancy, right?
Every parent is different... and as their kid you know best how you can tell them