Teens feeling unappreciated advice

[mata]

So, Me and my LDR (Girlfriend) used to spend a lot of time together for a little over three (3) months but over the holiday break she haven't really been talking to me anymore, We both do noting all day so we don't really have anything to talk about but we would watch TV/Movies online and play games and just talk about stuff. Because she was not really talking to me I asked her if she is up for continuing to build on our relationship. She said yes and then called me the next day. Then said she will call me at night and then did not, It's not the first time she said we will talk at night but did not. Going from talking each night to almost never, I also asked her if we would go back to spending time with one and other after the holiday break, She said Yes. I could use some advice.

Personally we both are a bit clingy and I love clingy.
I know holiday break is not over yet, Am i just over reacting.


Thank you for your help. It's much appreciated.

[snow_girl]

Maybe you need to stop being so clingy with each other and go out do different things and then you'll have more to talk about.

[mata]

I've read the forum rules so thank you for telling me to go outside.. For some people outside and doing stuff is not really an option.

[snow_girl]

Come again?

[stormy]

So, Me and my LDR (Girlfriend) used to spend a lot of time together for a little over three (3) months but over the holiday break she haven't really been talking to me anymore, We both do noting all day so we don't really have anything to talk about but we would watch TV/Movies online and play games and just talk about stuff. Because she was not really talking to me I asked her if she is up for continuing to build on our relationship. She said yes and then called me the next day. Then said she will call me at night and then did not, It's not the first time she said we will talk at night but did not. Going from talking each night to almost never, I also asked her if we would go back to spending time with one and other after the holiday break, She said Yes. I could use some advice.

Personally we both are a bit clingy and I love clingy.
I know holiday break is not over yet, Am i just over reacting.


Thank you for your help. It's much appreciated.

I have found that sometimes forcing myself to not speak to my SO all day makes ME actually appreciate our relationship that much more. It is not something I have done often but when I barely speak to him and finally speak to him at the end of a long day... nothing else feels like it.

Also, if she is with her family for the winter break she could just be spending lots of time with him, so no time for the leisure things she usually does (with you). I know when my SO went home to see his family I heard from him less at first as he was seeing everyone for the first time, getting accumulated with being home again... once things leveled out, he was able to put energy into obviously missing and caring about me. Let time run a bit, relax a bit, keep busy a bit. I find it is OK to reach out once a day even if they are busy, but let them respond when they can.

To me, it does not sound as if you are being unappreciated, if this were long lasting then maybe, but it seems to just be a lull in attention (which EVERYONE goes through).

[mata]

Thank you for the advice stormy, I'll give it a try I understand not spending a lot of time with one and other then spending a bit makes it more special I guess I will have to control the little bit of clinginess I have. Just posted to make sure I was just overreacting.

+snow_girl I'm unable to really go outside noting to do other then walmart, movies or talk to crackheads.

[snow_girl]

Well you could go for a walk? or just sit outside in your yard and read, go out with friends somewhere? It says you live in DC, theres the art galley, Nat His museum. Holocaust museum, I'd totally go there!

[stormy]

+snow_girl I'm unable to really go outside noting to do other then walmart, movies or talk to crackheads.

I am unsure as to how old you are Mata so that may change things a lot, but there are definitely things to do in your city (I have visited a few times)! I do know what you are talking about when saying "talk to crackheads" (which you may want to, in the future, be careful about your wording on issues such as that one), believe me I get it... but again if you are of an age which you can go out on your own there are plenty of things to do, FREE things, in cities such as ours. We are actually very lucky for that. Even just finding groups of people who enjoy gaming and what not at the local comic shop!

[mata]

I'm 24, I took a day and seen it all when I first moved here. I know it's poor wording "talk to crackheads". I've been doing the online gaming for years and I'm no longer enjoy gaming I just do it to kill time till school starts, I'll find something to do other then naps.

[snow_girl]

I'm 24, I took a day and seen it all when I first moved here. I know it's poor wording "talk to crackheads". I've been doing the online gaming for years and I'm no longer enjoy gaming I just do it to kill time till school starts, I'll find something to do other then naps.

I went to the same art gallery 6 times in a year, there are always things you missed the last time and things you love to see again.

[Rugger]

I'm 24, I took a day and seen it all when I first moved here. I know it's poor wording "talk to crackheads". I've been doing the online gaming for years and I'm no longer enjoy gaming I just do it to kill time till school starts, I'll find something to do other then naps.

I really doubt you saw everything there is to see in DC in one day. Hell I spent three days there in September and still failed to see all I wanted too. It took us a whole day to do the National Zoo! There are SO many museums there, a lot of which are free. Get off your ass and go to some of them. The exhibits change all the time and most museums are too big to do in one day. I think you are just making excuses to be miserable.

Stop being to darn clingy and go out and see your city. That's like me complaining " I went out and saw all there is to see in New York City, and now I'm going to sit home all day and whine about it"

[Malaga]

Maybe she never calls because she ran out of things to talk about. How do you get more things to talk about? You do something with yourself during the day. Maybe if you re-visited the art gallery for example, you could talk to her about it and she'd find your conversations interesting again and want to call you again. Doing nothing all day makes you a dull conversationalist and a boring person to be with. Make yourself interesting again and then see how it goes.

[lyonsgirl]

I'm 24, I took a day and seen it all when I first moved here. I know it's poor wording "talk to crackheads". I've been doing the online gaming for years and I'm no longer enjoy gaming I just do it to kill time till school starts, I'll find something to do other then naps.

Unless you just stuck your head into each museum and said, "Okay done", there's no way you've seen all of the, as someone else has mentioned, FREE museums in one day. I was there a few weekends ago, and my SO & I spent all day in the Air & Space museum, and didn't see everything. In that one museum. And there are like, 8 FREE museums on National Mall.

Plus, there's more to see/do than just the monuments and museums, just like any other city. I dunno, if I were living in DC & LD, chances are my SO wouldn't hear much of me because I'd be so busy with all of the monuments and museums...

[melarie]

As for feeling unappreciated, when you talk a lot and you're both homebodies, you'll have times where you just don't talk much. My boyfriend and I have that problem some times because we're such hermits. But we learned to accept it, despite being clingy, because we just don't always have thing to talk about. We're having one of those days today. I'm watching tv, he's probably watching netflix. We're just sending little messages here and there. Tomorrow we'll probably talk all day. We just have days where we give each other space. It's normal.

[lilcupcake]

I agree with Melarie. We're homebodies too. he gets out more than me because he has access to more things and more friends, but even still he doesn't talk much about his day. "It was okay." "It was boring" "it was long" is generally the most i get unless i really push lol. He just isn't the kind of person that likes that sit and talk about his day in detail. maybe that's how she's feeling? Even with my "go no where do nothing" life style, i still end up doing a lot of the talking. If you find a movie you like, tell her about it. if something funny happened that day, you can tell her. the things you guys talk about dont have to be really amazing. if you guys click well, then her hearing about your toilet over flowing might just make her day.