Teens Not beng taken seriously

[kittyxuchiha11]

So i've noticed a lot that teens in ldr are not being taken seriously at all. It's hard enough being a teen without having people telling you that your relationship won't last because you're a teen.
So guys, this is a post I want us all to have a little discussion on.
Do you feel teens are more hard done by than adults in ldr?
Have you ever had an experience where someone has brushed off you're relationship just because your young?
I feel a lot of the time people look down on me and my relationship because we are young but why should being older make a relationship better? Older people have bad relationships and have break ups so why are we told as teens that our relationships aren't going to last because we're only a certain age?
Discuss!

[Unconditional]

I know most teens in an ldr are just "brushed off" or in any relationship really. Considering almost all relationships in high school end by the time you start college anyways. However, do you think the generation that raised us is very suspicious/skeptical of ldr's because it's not something their generation has really used? Like up until now there was no need for them to understand what it is? (I hope someone out there understands what I'm thinking about) Like online dating has never been so popular as now, and because of the way other generations were raised some of the older people (Like our mom's and dad's) just don't understand it? And therefore that's why they are as close-minded as they are about this?
Also the real crime stories you hear about meeting people online and everything certainly Doesn't help the situation.

I'm sure I could've worded this better or something, however that's what was floating around in my mind. I apologize for any misspellings, I always try to spell things correctly.

[dragonlady]

hmm i agree and not at the same time.
around that age it is "normal" that a relationships dont last and it is very rare that couples of that age last and get married that is what we have got for expierence on "our age" *oh gods i feel old now!*
and on the other with the internet now a days the world literly gets a lot smaller, and it is logical that more people get into ldr's
off course you have the horror stories but hey it can happen in your street to not only on the internet although it is more sneeky in my eyes

moms and dads are just afraid for the well beeing of there kids and that never goes away, my own mom was just as worried as i was a teen i think they still see us like that although we get older. and yes closeminded on some points, but if you act as a adult (very large concept off course, because how does a adult act the only answer i can give you there is take responsibility for your actions , think things over and CONSIDER the thought of a other and discuss them and when you feel you get angry say so excuse yourself and say you come back when you calmed down again. hell i still dont feel adult and the big secret of adults is they dont!)

but yeah teens think there "untouchable" and "act" like they know everything, and there is nothing a "adult" can tell you to make you think differently because we have seen it already or been there self, but we cant pass that knowledge it must be learned.
hope my ramble makes any sense there is to much to tell and explain and i simple cant..

[Deleted]

I believe that all LDRs are open to judgment, but I agree that that especially applies to young people. I just learned to tell myself, "fuck what people think!" I'm not gonna let what other people say get to me. That was a really important lesson for me to learn, even though it wasn't easy. What other people say won't affect reality.

[snow]

Experience, really. Every 7 years you have to make a lifechanging decision and it does exactly this - it changes your life. Where do you go to school? Which courses do you want to take? What do you want to do in the future? Where do you want to spend your life? Do you stay or do you leave? Do you want to get married? Do you want to have kids?

All of these things will change you. I am not the same person I was with 17 - at that age I was madly in love with a girl who lived in germany and I would have done anything to move to her, even drop out of school. I am glad I didn't, because in the end the relationship wouldn't have lasted and I would have had a hard time finishing school after dropping out. I really think it is experience from what people have gone through and what they know had changed them.

I don't judge young couples though and I would never tell them that it won't work out, because I do hope it does!

[melarie]

I think it's mostly that teen relationships in general aren't expected to last, and the added struggles of LDR supposedly make it impossible. And there's the fact that many believe think it's bad to get into a serious relationship so young. I'm guilty of this mindset myself, and I'm a teen. I see really young people getting into them and think "Wow, this person doesn't even know what they want yet!" I kind of see it like those projects they make you do in your early high school years where they make you choose a major and look at colleges and basically plan your future. How many of those people are still going to want to go to the school they picked or even go into that career? Plus, I've always viewed high school relationships as kind of a joke. I guess because I mostly saw people going from person to person every 4 months to a year. I just think of all the friends I outgrew or that outgrew me, or we just had nothing in common anymore and it doesn't make sense to get into something that's as big a commitment as an LDR when you're going to be an entirely different person in 1 year. Why go through all that heartache just for someone you're most likely going to outgrow? I think once you've really found who you are or want to be, that's when you can promise someone a future. And in an LDR, you have to have that plan of a future together for it to be worth it. That and adults think (and may be right) that teens are generally selfish lol. It's hard to make a relationship work when you're selfish.

But yes, my relationship has been brushed off. Not because it's an LDR, just because I'm a teen, technically. Me and my friends were once making lists of all the people we've kissed or done more with and I said "I think Shane might be the end of my list." And one of them said "He won't be."

[squeeker]

I think that teenage relationships CAN last. But in general, a lot of times, they don't. I think this is because teenagers are going through MAJOR changes in their lives, and discovering who they are! There are so many emotions and things going on. I think people can find the person they want to be with forever as a teenager... in fact I met my boyfriend when I was 19 though we didn't start officially 'dating' right away, we started dating and met for the first time when I was 20. But still.. I think the main thing is if you meet someone that you are serious about when you are a teenager, take things slow, because you both are going to be changing so much. Even I am still changing, and I'm not a teenager anymore, but I have discovered more of who I am. I didn't know what I wanted when I was in high school, and also didn't date - but mostly because I was way too scared of even talking to boys at the time unless they asked me a question but I did my best to avoid them, and none of my friend group dated in high school either!! lol

Anyways, so I think, in a younger relationship, it is more important to wait and have patience, and not rush things, because you are growing as a person, and need to discover who you are and allow your partner to discover who they are.. and I think older people tend to know more of who they are and what they want - because they have had more years to figure it out. Although I think any relationship should be taken slower rather than faster.

Though what's really important, is how YOU feel. If you feel that you want to be with your partner forever, don't let other people get to you if they tell you it won't work out. That is between you and your partner.. and whether you are meant for each other or not. You might find that you still want to be together in a few years or maybe you will grow apart.. that can be whether you are young or older.. I think older people tend to just want you to be careful.. but it's your responsibility to show them whether your relationship will work or not. Don't worry about what others think. But some advice is worth listening to.

[RachelAnne]

I agree with what everyone else is saying. Normally, people will automatically assume that if you're young and in a relationship, it will not last...because of what was mentioned in the previous posts lol. Teenagers are going through a lot of changes and learning to discover yourself. I'm not the same person I was 3, 4 years ago. A lot happens in a teenager's life to shape who they become. It's very rare that a high school relationship will last..it IS possible, but rare. I think if you're in a serious, committed relationship then you shouldn't judge what others are saying. Relationships come and go, it's up to you and your partner to decide whether or not the relationship lasts or not.

[differentcountries]

Realistically, relationships don't last. Ever. And when the relationship starte before you are grown up, there is a lot of important change to go through that can bring people closer or further away.

I think it is very rude when people say that teenage relationships (and teenage LDRs in perticular) don't last. That is like encouraging people to not give their best shot! Even if the relationship don't last it can still be important. And some even last.