Teens How do I find a long distance?

[Scott.m]

Hello I am a 16 year old boy from the UK, and I have been looking for a long distance for a while. I like long distance as there's no pressure to be near them all the time however I find it difficult to find a girl online, and with the constant threat of older people out there, I want to find somewhere that I can find girls without feeling scared that she isn't who she says she is. I would like to thank you in advance for any advice thank you

[AussieAmericanGirl66]

Hello I am a 16 year old boy from the UK, and I have been looking for a long distance for a while. I like long distance as there's no pressure to be near them all the time however I find it difficult to find a girl online, and with the constant threat of older people out there, I want to find somewhere that I can find girls without feeling scared that she isn't who she says she is. I would like to thank you in advance for any advice thank you

Really, most of us didn't go looking for a long distance relationship. It just happened because we ran into someone on line that we liked, and even with the distance, decided to stay in touch. Truthfully, it can be very hard to handle. Time zones can really be a problem, depending on how far away a person is. Actually, you may find out that there can be a lot of pressure, because girls, if they really like someone, do want to be with them, and in an LDR, they do expect regular times to chat with you, phone calls/Skype time, etc. It isn't the same as being able to go out to a movie, or sport event, or even out to eat with someone, and then just go home...it can get lonely. And while your friends are out having fun, you are with someone miles away, who can't go out with you and your friends.

Anyway...The best way to find a new friend online is to meet on a gamer or hobby site, or a discussion group on a Social Network, something you are interested in. But you do need to be careful who you talk to. Find out from your friends what sites they go to, like gamers, hobbies, music, sport, etc. and start talking to people that way. And always be careful about how much personal information you put online.

[snow]

You don't go looking for one.
If you pressure yourself with finding someone who lives far away, you are setting yourself up for failure. Try to find someone you can fall in love with and don't make their location a priority.

[AussieAmericanGirl66]

You don't go looking for one.
If you pressure yourself with finding someone who lives far away, you are setting yourself up for failure. Try to find someone you can fall in love with and don't make their location a priority.

I agree completely, Snow. You said it much better than I did.

[ldrxoxo]

I agree with others, never purposely find something. I went on a site called Omegle just to chat with random friends. I never imagined I'd find anyone to date on there until I did unexpectedly. I always thought I could handle being friends with someone long distance since I knew it possibly wasn't going to work out anyway, but then this one hit me. Anyway, to meet friends, you can try Omegle. They are always far away, even in different countries, but when you force it, it won't happen.

[youngisthan]

Love is not a thing to find its a feeling which can be strike you anytime anywhere, if you want your true love then you have to wait for it to come. And yes LDR is not easy dear though you like it, it is tough enough to handle it.

[milaya]

Sounds more like you need to grow up than find a long distance relationship.
You don't want pressure of having to be near them all the time? Overall it sounds like you want nothing serious and you should stick with that.
If you get into a long distance relationship you can expect to experience far more pressure and problems than finding someone in your own neighborhood. You seem to see long distance relationships as a kind of easy casual dating, where you can spend all your personal time on what you want - sorry, but that's not how it works.

[differentcountries]

Girls come in all shapes and sizes, weather near or far. Some girls like to be together all the time (in person or over the phone/internet), some girls appeciate to be with their friends without you, some girls have a busy life where they entertain themselves a lot. Sounds to me like you want to be in a relationship where you can have your personal space, then you must look for a girl who also likes that. Problem is, if you find such a girl that is a match to you you might find yourself drawn in - soon YOU will be the one asking for more time with her, just because being without her is painful, because love is often like that. There is plenty of preassure to be near your loved one "all the time" in an LDR, especially an international one, because you can't ever just casually hang out, you have to plan around the time difference, her plans where she lives and all the rest. A busy girl that gives you space is also a girl you have to negotiate about your time together.

Some practical advice; the best way of knowing that people over the net are who they say they are, is meeting them over Skype and turning on picture, sound, perhaps even Skyping from outdoors so you can see the environment for yourself. Anyone can fake a picture and many do, but faking live images that interact with you online is not so easy. Also, start saving up, because being in a LDR is expensive.

[dragonlady]

ldr's are hell! you shoudnt want something like on purpose, it just happens
your still joung just let it happen

[Harlequin]

It's always best to not actively look for something when it comes to relationships; the best things always happen when you're not looking for it.
Long distance relationships actually require a lot more work than it appears from an outside perspective, so it may not be the ideal situation you're looking for. If you're looking for something casual and stress-free, close distance is probably more what you need.

But I guess, if you're looking for places to meet people who are most likely who they say they are, then I would go with interpals.net.
It's a pen pal website, and you can look up people based on their hobbies/interests, country, etc. That's how I met my s/o and my various other international buddies, and so far everyone's been legit. I have very few complaints about the site, really.

[bubblehits]

It's hard to be in an LDR. You might not want the pressure of having to be around someone all the time but when you can't be near that person, it literally kills you a little bit each time. When you have a bad day you want that person to be there with you but they'll be hundreds or thousands of miles away.
Special occasions spent alone because your partner is so far away. It's not nice and if I could help it, I wouldn't have chosen it. But love finds you from anywhere, don't go looking for it.

And besides, you're only 16, you have plenty of time to find someone. I was 19 before I first found someone.

[Unconditional]

I don't think any of us went looking for an ldr. Ldrs are hard!!
They take work, patience, dedication and maturity. Your sixteen, focus on school and living your life, then hopefully love will find you.
Also, "catfishing" is ALWAYS a possibility with finding someone online. You have to be really careful, and cover all your bases.

[jessicagrace44]

I met my boyfriend on Omegle too! I was pretty embarrassed by that at first, but hey, it worked out!