Teens Advice/Closing the Distance

[Raelo]

Hi! So, I just turned 17, and I'm getting my GED (Long story on why I chose the GED..)

Anyways! I heard it takes a month or two to go through GED classes depending on your needs. Wellll, my mother actually approves of him and I closing the distance after I get my GED! His birthday is November 3rd, and I would be super stoked if I could close the distance around his birthday as a lovely birthday present!

I just have a few questions x.x ...

1) Advice on first time riding on a plane alone
2) Advice on what to tell his mother when I ask her if I can move up there while he's still in school?
3) Advice on what I can do for his mother so I don't feel like a total mooch when I move up x.x

[Let's hope it doesn't take forever for me to find a job up there </3]

All and any advice is much appreciated!!!!

[BlueCat]

Firstly, what is a GED?

In answer to your questions...
1. Just be smart about it, keep your ID/wallet etc on you at all times. My advice for after you've booked your flight, is it to check which terminals they depart/arrive from and if you have connecting flights, check airport maps so you know easily how to get to and from each terminal without stressing about where you're going.
2. Don't know, sorry :P
3. Any jobs you can think of. Pick up the plates after dinner and put them in the dishwasher, offer to wash the dishes on a regular basis, offer to prepare meals, put money towards groceries, vacuum, clean the bathroom. Basically, do things around the house without having been asked to. For me not seeming like a mooch is more about taking initiative to help, nobody likes to have to ask someone else to help out with jobs because they're not pulling their weight.

[Zapookie]

Your profile says you haven't met yet. I would advise a few visits first before moving in with someone who you do not know very well. Once you feel comfortable in your relationship and you've spent a lot of time together in person, I would suggest only then moving.

[silvermoonfairy3]

Firstly, what is a GED?

It's a General Education Diploma that is used in place of receiving a US high school diploma. (I believe the GED is actually international, but I don't know what diploma it replaces in other countries, since education systems are a bit different.)

They're generally undertaken by people who didn't get a high school diploma for some reason, and want to go back and 'graduate' high school officially. In the past, it was common for veterans returning from wars, so they could get their GED and go to college or get a job.
These days, that might still happen a bit, but it also might be a factory worker going back for the GED after being in the factory for years, or a young woman who dropped out of high school because she got pregnant as a teen, or whatever.

In some cases they're received by students of high school age who can't complete high school traditionally for some reason, but that's less common. (Because even students with chronic illnesses, etc. arrange to complete their traditional high school work from home/hospitals/etc. and get their high school diploma.)


OP, if I can ask, what's the "long story" on choosing to do a GED? Is it so you can move with him quicker?

I have to say, while there's nothing to be ashamed of with a GED, I don't think it's the best option as a choice for convenience. If it can be avoided and a standard high school diploma received, that's usually the way to go. GEDs have a bit of a reputation in the US as the diploma that a high-school dropout got. And while there are sometimes valid reasons for dropping out of high school, and definitely there are ways that it shows the person was dedicated to going back and finishing their education despite obstacles and hardships, it's one of those things you're going to have to expect to come up, at least for awhile.

It's not that it's "frowned upon" specifically, but it is something you'll likely have to explain for several years, whether that's to colleges or in job interviews. (Depending on the field.) As you're older no one will care, but definitely for awhile as you're getting established, it's going to come up.


For other things to think about, are you dual-citizenship Canadian? Because otherwise, you can't just move to Canada. You need a visa to live and work there. You can visit Canada, for I think up to 6 months as a US citizen, but beyond that you'll need to make arrangements to get residency permission.


And finally, regarding your questions.. if you haven't even asked her to move yet, I wouldn't worry about how to not be a mooch. There's still a possibility she'll say no. No offense, and I don't mean to be negative here (and I certainly don't know your partner's family) but if my (hypothetical) son's 17 year old girlfriend wanted to move in with us, in another country, while he was still in school.. I'd probably say no. There would have to be some *really* extenuating circumstances, like the partner being in an abusive home situation, or something else.

What is your reasoning for wanting to move in, other than wanting to be close by? Is this your first relationship?
How is being nearby going to help advance your lives, especially when you're both so young and just starting out? What will you be doing with your time while you're there and he's in school? What are the positives he/his family will see from you being there? I think the best way to ask his mother about moving in is to have solid reasons why it will be a good idea for both of you, and how it will help your lives progress happily and productively. (Whatever that means for you.)

Are these things you've thought about?

Have you met his family? What do you want to do with your life/career? What do you want to pursue in Canada? What does your partner want to do for a career? Does he plan to go to college? Will you tag along with him as he does that?

I don't mean to sound harsh, but I think this plan needs an awful lot more thinking through.