My boyfriend and I met about 8 months ago and have been together for 5 1/2 months. He lives in England, and I live in America. I just recently turned 18 (he is 18 and soon to be 19 next month) and I hadn't even told my mother about him until about a week ago. My SO and I have been planning to save up money so he could come see me here in the US some time next year. The original plan was that he was going to come here, stay in a hotel (but wow, that is expensive!) and I would introduce him to my mother while he was here. It was a risky plan.
However, after I told my mom, she seemed to accept it and said we could arrange for him to stay here if he were to ever come and visit.
The conversation I had with her took an odd turn after she had had a bit to drink, and we ended up arguing about something irrelevant and not worth mentioning here, so I returned to my room for the night. The next day, I was expecting question after question about him, but she said absolutely nothing.
You have to know my mom and I aren't very close at all, and I rarely speak to her about anything going on in my personal life, which is why I never told her about him in the first place, although I did want to. However, she is the type to try to nose her way into my personal life, so it was really unlike her to NOT ask anything.
Anyway, that evening I had finally got the courage to ask if she even remembered the conversation we had the previous night (since she was quite drunk by the end of it), and she said she remembered the part about him but she didn't remember his name. So I just nodded, told her his name, and then went upstairs.
A week or so has passed since then, and she hasn't asked me any questions about him at all. She really isn't the type of person to NOT ask questions about things like this, so it's been concerning me all week. I was speaking to my cousin and some friends, and they said that maybe she's just trying to ignore what she thinks is a "problem".
I went into the kitchen this evening and I finally brought it up and asked why she hasn't been asking about him at all, and she just shrugged and got this disgruntled look on her face before saying, "I can't help that your heart seems to really like him". This was mildly frustrating to me because both him and I just want her to accept him and our relationship. I said this to her, and she shook her head and basically told me that she doesn't believe he is legitimate.
I know for a fact that he is a real person and is who he says he is. I skype with him pretty much every day, for hours on end. His mother knows about me and even sometimes asks about me. I know his friend group, and he sends me pictures of his life throughout his day on a daily basis. I'm close friends with people that know him in person, my IRL friends have even met him via Skype and talked to him via facebook chats. I also just know way too much personal info about him for him to NOT be who he says he is.
I offered my mom the idea that she could meet him via skype sometime soon, and she downright refused unless his parents were there on the call too. He lives with his parents, but due to the time difference (he is 6 hours ahead) and some personal family issues that I would rather not type about here, that may be somewhat hard to do. I told her this and she just shook her head and said it was up to him and I to prove to her that he was real.
So, I'm posting here in hopes that maybe anyone of you could offer any advice on how to go about doing this? He had the idea that if he starts mailing me stuff she will maybe get the impression of how much he cares about me, to some degree. (he's mailed me something before for my birthday, but he did it through one of my close friends since it was a surprise and also my mom would have been suspicious if I received mail from England. However now that she knows about him it doesn't really matter if I do or not.)
However that probably definitely isn't enough with how stubborn my mom is. Has anyone had a similar experience?
However, after I told my mom, she seemed to accept it and said we could arrange for him to stay here if he were to ever come and visit.
The conversation I had with her took an odd turn after she had had a bit to drink, and we ended up arguing about something irrelevant and not worth mentioning here, so I returned to my room for the night. The next day, I was expecting question after question about him, but she said absolutely nothing.
You have to know my mom and I aren't very close at all, and I rarely speak to her about anything going on in my personal life, which is why I never told her about him in the first place, although I did want to. However, she is the type to try to nose her way into my personal life, so it was really unlike her to NOT ask anything.
Anyway, that evening I had finally got the courage to ask if she even remembered the conversation we had the previous night (since she was quite drunk by the end of it), and she said she remembered the part about him but she didn't remember his name. So I just nodded, told her his name, and then went upstairs.
A week or so has passed since then, and she hasn't asked me any questions about him at all. She really isn't the type of person to NOT ask questions about things like this, so it's been concerning me all week. I was speaking to my cousin and some friends, and they said that maybe she's just trying to ignore what she thinks is a "problem".
I went into the kitchen this evening and I finally brought it up and asked why she hasn't been asking about him at all, and she just shrugged and got this disgruntled look on her face before saying, "I can't help that your heart seems to really like him". This was mildly frustrating to me because both him and I just want her to accept him and our relationship. I said this to her, and she shook her head and basically told me that she doesn't believe he is legitimate.
I know for a fact that he is a real person and is who he says he is. I skype with him pretty much every day, for hours on end. His mother knows about me and even sometimes asks about me. I know his friend group, and he sends me pictures of his life throughout his day on a daily basis. I'm close friends with people that know him in person, my IRL friends have even met him via Skype and talked to him via facebook chats. I also just know way too much personal info about him for him to NOT be who he says he is.
I offered my mom the idea that she could meet him via skype sometime soon, and she downright refused unless his parents were there on the call too. He lives with his parents, but due to the time difference (he is 6 hours ahead) and some personal family issues that I would rather not type about here, that may be somewhat hard to do. I told her this and she just shook her head and said it was up to him and I to prove to her that he was real.
So, I'm posting here in hopes that maybe anyone of you could offer any advice on how to go about doing this? He had the idea that if he starts mailing me stuff she will maybe get the impression of how much he cares about me, to some degree. (he's mailed me something before for my birthday, but he did it through one of my close friends since it was a surprise and also my mom would have been suspicious if I received mail from England. However now that she knows about him it doesn't really matter if I do or not.)
However that probably definitely isn't enough with how stubborn my mom is. Has anyone had a similar experience?
Comment