Teens In need of direction

[Alexandrea]

I've never done this sort of thing before so I'm new to all of this, so please, bear with me. I'm 18 and I met this guy over the summer at a mission trip. Call it love and first sight or God knows what but for some reason I was just as inclined to talk to him as he was me. So we talked all summer and into the first semester of my senior year and his junior. It was never really defined "dating" but it was definitely inferred. It was constant talking June through November. before I forget the distance is 380 miles--so only two states away, but it's hard as a senior in high school to just drop everything on weekends and drive down there. We've talked about literally everything and I've never opened up to anyone like I have with him...but it turned into a sense of feeling like we would never see each other and that bothered me. My mom had told mE I could visit him but I never told him that because I was waiting for him to show a commitment to me on his own. That never came though because he was so caught up with school and work and such. So we told each other that it wouldn't ever work, to try to prevent ourselves from coming back even though when we said that we were still head over heels for each other. It's been pretty much a month since and I still want to cry my eyes out at night thinking about him but I'm not sure how much has changed with him in a month. I almost always am thinking of him and I swear I have never ever been like this with any other guy. I told myself I wouldn't make a fool of myself and tell him how I feel just for him to tell me distance is too hard, so I maybe talk to him here and there now. Should I just tell him? I have to hide all of this from my friends because they don't want me to have any involvement but yet I can't let go of him no matter how much I try.

[Lostviolinist]

I'd say tell him. You can't always expect a guy to come forward. I know I was never someone who would in the past. Assuming he says ok, just know what you guys are getting yourselves into. Getting over the distance takes a lot of commitment. It's definitely hard at first but once you get the hang of it and have a clear plan for the future, in my opinion, it becomes more manageable and hey, just maybe it'll all be worth it in the end. If you want it to work, stay positive, and talk. Communication is key.
If he says no, then give him time. If he doesn't feel ready to handle the distance then he just might not be and it won't work out unless both of you stay strong. If he honestly has zero interest, well, there's not much to do after that.

[R&R]

Communication is key in any relationship, CD or LD - friendships or romantic ones. People can't read your mind, so you have to be able to talk about what you think and how you feel. (Most men are especially oblivious to reading women and wish we would open our mouths with what's on our mind more often instead of making them guess.) You also have to be prepared for either answer. If he's in agreement that he wants to try a LDR, great. If he's not, then you have to respect his feelings and decision on that as well.

As far as your friends, they may just be trying to look out for your emotional well being. In the end though, it is your decision. I hope they would be there to support you if it works out just as much as if it doesn't.