Teens My LDR - Could we make this work?

[Azaelia]

Hi guys! My name's Rhianna!
I'm in a LDR with a guy from the US, and he's 14. I'm from England, and I'm 16. We met almost 3 years ago through an ex-boyfriend of mine, in October 2013. The pair had met two years prior to this, in 2011, through gaming. When we met, I was 13, and he was 11. Now, me and my ex boyfriend broke up about 2 years ago, but me and his friend stayed in contact, but for the first two and a half years of knowing each other, we were just friends.

I am 100% certain that he is who he says he is - even three years ago, we used to video and voice call. I've witnessed his voice breaking and his appearance changing as he grew up. I've seen his family while we've been video chatting (we have not met yet, I've just seen them come into his room occasionally), and I've also even seen his high school application form.

We started developing romantic feelings for each other around my birthday, which is the 20th of April, and started a relationship about one month ago. We understand that this is obviously quite rushed. It already took me a whole week to believe that he liked me, and to tell him that I liked him back. I didn't believe him at first, I thought that he was joking. But our opinion on it, is that we've known each other for ages. We didn't want to wait to get into a relationship, because we both knew that this was what we wanted. I believe that in an LDR, you have to have a goal to work towards, even from the start, and that goal is typically being able to see each other one day. We've been talking about me coming over and visiting him for a week in December, although we're going to have to try hard to convince our families. But, that's a topic for another day. As I'm 16, I can get a job in order to pay for this visit, but as my boyfriend is only 14, he can't. I understand this completely, and I do not mind that whatsoever.

He always says that he plans on moving over to England to be with me when he's older, which obviously, I'd love. But, I'm the first person that he's loved, and I can't help but feel that he's experiencing that typical "first love" infatuation. I really do love him, and sometimes I just get scared that he doesn't feel the exact same, although he always claims that he loves me more. Also, it will be at least 4 years until he'll be able to move here, at even that's unlikely, at such a young age. The process in getting a Visa is difficult and time consuming, and it can be expensive. We're serious about this, and we both really want this to work out.

I want your 100% honest opinion, do you think that it could be possible to make this work? Are we too young? Is the distance too long? Do you have a similar LDR story that you could share?
If you think I'm missing out an important detail, say so, and I'll elaborate.
Thank you!

[LivingInWonderland]

My advice would be to just take it one day at a time. You are both young. Just enjoy the relationship. Don't worry about setting plans for something so far off in your future, until it is necessary. A LOT can change in four years. You will both be different people, and you may not have the same desires then that you do now. If it works, great! If not, at least you both gave it a go.

Best of luck.

[kittyxuchiha11]

When I met my ex she was 13 and i was 15 and started dating when we were 14 and 16, so i know how you feel being such a young couple and definitely the stress of being the older one. She was from PA and I'm in Scotland, so yet again i know how fun that distance is to deal with. I was with my ex for 2 years and yeah it ended and she was the one to end it but it had nothing to do with the fact we were too young or that we were in a LDR. you change a lot as a teenager, like loads and loads and it ended pretty much because by the time it came to her breaking up with me she was a completely different person to the girl i started dating two years before that. you never know what the future holds and really no one can really tell you if your relationship is going to last or fail. if you guys can grow together and love each other until you're able to be together that's great and really awesome. Basically, don't think about it as if just because you're still young it means its destined to fail, there are couples on here who have been dating since they were young teens and are still together so there is hope for you. Just keep talking and keep him as your best friend and things should hopefully stay great :3

[C.C.]

I like your approach so much, it seems quite mature, but
Yes he might be experiencing that "first love" thing, or not. There's no way to know either that or the path your relationship will take.
During the early teen years (after too) we are in the process of learning ourselves, whether actively or passively, we discover, explore, change our views. Even our feelings and our perception of it changes.
Then on the other hand there are people (whom I really admire) who change in ways that go along with each other, and that makes them understand and love each other even more. There are young couples who end up together and happy.
Also, there are ldr couples who wait for years before even meeting for the first time, let alone closing the distance.
Enjoy the present and while trying to maintain that mature approach, also try to relax a bit more. You have no way of knowing what's in the future and even if your relationship were to fail, you'd still get an amazing times and experience to remember. Focus on the present too and try to enjoy it as much as possible~ :3

[BaconGirl05]

Welcome to the forums Rhianna

It is definitely possible for things to work out at that age. My SO and I met when we were 14 and 16. He was from Australia and I was from the US. It's been almost 5 years since we started dating and we are still together, in fact, we're even engaged. However, just focus on the 'now' and not the future just yet. You guys may have to wait to meet until you are older. My SO and I had to wait until we graduated high school before we met for the first time (it was about 2 1/1 years into dating).

You guys may be young, but that doesn't mean things won't work out. Not all teen relationships do, but there are some that will. Make time for each other and enjoy the time you spend together. When the time comes, you can talk about meeting up and taking the next step in the relationship. My advice is to also make sure you guys have a life outside each other. Since I was younger when my SO and I started dating, we spent a lot of time on Facetime chatting and not going out with friends or family. We became dependent on each other and the relationship was becoming unhealthy. It's important to do other social things as well, so try to get out at times.

Good luck and if you need anything, you can always send me a message