Teens Long distance because of age gap

[Brielle123]

My relationship is really complicated. I met my person 4 years ago and we started becoming exclusive over a year ago. We’re much in love and everything is amazing between us and has been for a long time. I’m 17 and he just turned 20. That can seem like along age gap and people judge me or kinda think that’s weird or I’m too young, but like I said we met four years ago when we both were still in high school. My parents are crazy strict and probably would never let me see him, and if I brought it up I’m afraid that they will somehow make it so I can’t see or talk to him again. Everytime I see him we have to sneak around. And it makes this whole thing so much worse. But I’m suffering from major LDT depression. And If everything was right we’d be in a very committed relationship. I guess I really need some advice and opinions.

[Rezie]

Your age gap doesn't seem that much to me. You were both in HS 4 years ago? You haven't even told your parents so how do you know they will disapprove? Also when will you turn 18? Cause I'm thinking that if you have already sneaked around for a year then would it be impossible to sneak around till you are 18? I don't think you should sneak around, but this is based on assumption that your parents are unreasonably strict.

[Brielle123]

I’m currently still in high school going into my senior year, I’ll turn 18 in March, I’ve had one boyfriend and that was in 8th grade because my parents were so involved and never let me do anything I’ve never introduced anyone to my parents because I don’t want to put my partner through that. But the guy I’m with has stuck around through the craziness and doesn’t care that he has to go through it. I currently don’t have my license because my parents don’t want me too, and they question crazily what I’m doing even when hanging out with friends I’ve had for years and they know well. And I’ve also never gotten in trouble for any reblouis behavior for them to question me like that.

[sarahendipity]

Same age gap here! (except reversed) I just turned 20 and he's 17. I totally can relate in that sense, I hate being judged by people who don't even know us. It sucks, but try to ignore it because honestly all that matters is the two of you and the love you have for each other. As for your parents, maybe get a feel for their opinions on age gap relationships before telling them about yours. My parents are pretty conservative (and they are the same age as one another) so I wasn't expecting them to understand but they really didn't care. So you never know! Good luck!

[Melody7]

Oh my goodness...
A 3 year age gap is nothing. It's perfectly fine and you don't have to worry about it.
I'm in a 26 years (!) age gap relationship and we have been through some hard times because of other people & family but that's normal I guess. My family is strict as well but I don't see why your parents would complain about a 3 year age gap, trust me.
As long as you get along well with your partner and have a connection AND commitment then you shouldn't be worried about other people's opinions. I have seen 10, 20, or even 25+ years age differences.

[snow]

The age gap is not REALLY the problem, it's the age of consent.
It honestly would have been smarter to tell your parents when you were both underage as now it will always look like your boyfriend is just WAITING for you to turn 18 so you can have sex - even if that is not the case, it'll look like it.

You know your parents best. If waiting until you're 18 makes sense, wait. If it makes no difference, it makes no difference and any day sooner they know about him is a day they can prepare themselves that their little girl has a partner.