Introducing children to each other

[NikkiDeAnn75]

I have met my SO's daughter (16) and he has met my daughter (also 16). So far everything has gone great. Does anyone have any advice on introducing your children to your SO's children? They are both great girls and I think they will have a lot in common, but he is nervous about introducing them because he's afraid one or the other might become jealous. We are tentatively looking at closing the distance in June of 2013, and would like to make everything as smooth as possible between our girls. His daughter lives with her mother and my daughter would live with us.

[snow_girl]

I would do something fun when introducing them, teens can be funny and if you just go 'this is ____ and this is ____" and push them together then it might be awkward, but if you did mini golf or bowling (assuming the girls don't think thats lame) then it might be a fun way to team up against the parents and bond. There might be jealously towards the other girl? If everyone gets along so far I maybe not be too huggy or physically affectionate towards the others child until maybe after a couple days when each has had a chance to warm up to the other.

[blankita719]

There's a good age difference between our sons, but we introduced them like "this is _______, meet _________" and let them find their own way to try and feel each other out. Luckily, the boys are both into video games, so while my son doesn't play quite the same graphic games as his son, they would watch each other play and try and help each other with their moves (well, my 9 year old just watches the 17 year old, but it's really sweet how he'll tell him that he did awesome killing that zombie!)

With girls, I know it's a little more difficult because teenage girls are a bit more territorial than boys. I think doing something with them together might be fun like that, or maybe take them out to a cool place for dinner, somewhere neutral where neither girl has a home advantage?

[stephanieaz]

Would it be possible to take them on a mini vacation to a theme park or something? 16 year old girls can be tough! Good luck.

[Alle1770]

I don't have kids or anything, nor am I in the position of being the daughter of someone in an LDR, but I just thought I'd give my view on this anyways! When I was 16, me and my family went to visit another family (my parents and the parents of the other family were great friends) that I'd never met in my entire life. They also had a daughter aged 16, and when we got there, they simply introduced us to each other and then left us to figure it out ourselves. It became quite awkward. Younger kids have an easy time just getting to know each other because they have less boundaries and stuff than older kids, but when I was 16 I was a lot more self-aware and didn't want to seem weird, and so was the other girl, so it led to a lot of awkward silences and lame conversations like "Like the weather here?". I'd suggest what other people have, to take them out for something fun that you can do together, so they don't feel forced into getting to know each other. It's also a lot easier to talk to someone when you're occupied with something else

Of course, this is just my opinion based on my own experiences, your kids might be different so just go with what seems to suit you the best, and good luck!

[2Rocky]

I'm resurrecting this thread because it is going to happen this Friday.

ML is arriving Friday night with her two children age 18 and 17. I'll meet her at the airport with my youngest and we will have an hour and a half ride home from the airport. ML has requested that my 11 yo daughter bring the card game she gave her last summer, since her kids enjoyed it. (Spot -it).

They will be staying in my guest room and sharing my daughter's bathroom for two nights.

My middle daughter will be arriving home later that night from a probable loss from a basketball game. The next morning we have reservations to go ice skating along with 2 other teenagers and their mom.
So there will be a bit more of a group mentality rather than forced 1 on 1 conversation.

I'll let you know how it goes...