A little background:
We've been together for around a year, but have known each other much longer. We both have children with our previous SOs. He's in the US and I'm in Canada.
The problem is:
His ex had moved out of state to live with her new SO. The day before yesterday he told me that she had called him claiming to be getting kicked out. He says he offered to help her get an apartment in the state he lives in, but she wound up calling his mom who went to pick up her and their kid and who are now both staying in the house my SO lives in. Feeling out of control of a situation that makes me very uncomfortable, I panicked and ended it with him. Obviously I did not handle it well at all. The situation worries me for a few reasons. I know when you have children there is always going to be some form of a relationship with the ex, so living in the same house seems like a bad idea. His ex has always hated me, and I have suspicions that she has ulterior motives and is hoping to rekindle their relationship. I feel that way because she's not been single in many years and just leaves one SO for another. Of course now in hindsight, by ending it the way I did I likely pushed him right towards her, though he claims he isn't interested in getting back together or being with anyone else. The distance further complicates things and makes me feel more helpless. He hasn't spoken to me since that day, which isn't unusual given that every time we have an argument or when I'm feeling discouraged by the distance he tends to withdraw. There are a lot of other little things that probably exacerbate the situation, such as he is bipolar and I have trouble expressing emotion in a healthy way. Now that it's seemingly over, I feel heartbroken and jealous and worried about what is going on with them. I don't even know what I'm hoping will happen. I'd like for him to talk to me, but I honestly don't know if I can continue a long distance relationship with someone who lives with their ex (albeit temporarily, supposedly). I know I reacted terribly. I guess I'm just hoping for some insight or some other perspectives that are more clear than my own.
Edited to fix sloppy emotional typos.
We've been together for around a year, but have known each other much longer. We both have children with our previous SOs. He's in the US and I'm in Canada.
The problem is:
His ex had moved out of state to live with her new SO. The day before yesterday he told me that she had called him claiming to be getting kicked out. He says he offered to help her get an apartment in the state he lives in, but she wound up calling his mom who went to pick up her and their kid and who are now both staying in the house my SO lives in. Feeling out of control of a situation that makes me very uncomfortable, I panicked and ended it with him. Obviously I did not handle it well at all. The situation worries me for a few reasons. I know when you have children there is always going to be some form of a relationship with the ex, so living in the same house seems like a bad idea. His ex has always hated me, and I have suspicions that she has ulterior motives and is hoping to rekindle their relationship. I feel that way because she's not been single in many years and just leaves one SO for another. Of course now in hindsight, by ending it the way I did I likely pushed him right towards her, though he claims he isn't interested in getting back together or being with anyone else. The distance further complicates things and makes me feel more helpless. He hasn't spoken to me since that day, which isn't unusual given that every time we have an argument or when I'm feeling discouraged by the distance he tends to withdraw. There are a lot of other little things that probably exacerbate the situation, such as he is bipolar and I have trouble expressing emotion in a healthy way. Now that it's seemingly over, I feel heartbroken and jealous and worried about what is going on with them. I don't even know what I'm hoping will happen. I'd like for him to talk to me, but I honestly don't know if I can continue a long distance relationship with someone who lives with their ex (albeit temporarily, supposedly). I know I reacted terribly. I guess I'm just hoping for some insight or some other perspectives that are more clear than my own.
Edited to fix sloppy emotional typos.
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