Engaged!!! But I'm a little worried...

[Soapysoph22]

Hi all!

My SO flew over just over 3 weeks ago to see me. I am gutted he's gone home, It's heartbreaking every time we have to do our goodbyes. I always end up crying days before he's due to leave and he has to cuddle me to sleep.

It's over 4 years now that we've been in a relationship and he proposed to me during his visit!! I'm happy about that! We're 20 but we really need to start closing the distance soon. It's too much of a strain on our relationship being 5000 miles away. We're both lonely people who happened to find each other and we both help one another feel better.

Anyways since he went back home I have a worry. I'm worried that I might be pregnant. We had sex many times when he was here - his visit was from the 4th - 17th may. The day he arrived we had protected sex, we did it again many times after that but I recall a moment during sex the condom slipped off and I thought he had got another one ( I apologise if this sounds really rude) but we had sex in the doggy style position and it wasn't until after we finished he told me that he just continued having sex with me without a condom but he didn't come inside me. ( Again I'm sorry for the details) but I have him a blowjob so he could ejaculate in my mouth.

Since he left I have gained around 4lbs, I feel sick. My stomach and bum is slightly larger and my boobs are sore. We did use condoms when he was here and I told my parents so they don't suspect anything apart from telling me that I've gained a little weight. Maybe my metabolism is slowing down? My periods are very irregular, I did have a period when he was here it came the day after we had another night of sex ( 15th may) but it was 34 days after my last one. My periods can vary from being 26 - 35 days apart. That period varied from being light to heavy to light again.

These past few days I'm more sleepy than usual, and I get weird cramps down below especially when I'm lying down. I feel queasy especially around certain foods like bacon. Maybe it's all just in my head?

I have to wait I guess till my next period is due and if it's more than 35 days then I'll have to take a test or two to be sure. I have the cramps and queasiness as I'm typing this.

All I want to know is, based on what I've wrote, could it be a possibility that I'm pregnant or is it all in my head? I've been emotional this weekend thinking about this.

Thank you for reading this, I really appreciate this.

Xx

[Lovebee]

Congratulations on your engagement, first of all.

Secondly, the only way you can put your mind at ease is by doing a pregnancy test. We can give you advice until the cows come home but we're not doctors and every woman's biochemistry is slightly different, so what is true for one woman might not be true for another.

You can buy a twin pack of tests from Boots, so if you take one now and it comes out negative, you can always take the other one in a few weeks' time to put your mind at ease, as it might be too early to tell.

My best advice would be to get to your doctor (where you could have a free pregnancy test and some professional advice) and go on the pill - it'll make your periods like clockwork and take away the worry!

Hope this helps and good luck.

[Riyko]

I agree with lovebee a pregnancy test right now will be the only way to ease your mind until you start your period again or find out you're pregnant.

[dragonlady]

yes go to the doctor! (and maybe next time when it might happen call the doc for a morning after pill)

[floridaellen]

Congrats on your engagement!

The only way to put your mind at ease is to take a pregnancy test or go to your doctor.

[Jade_Crystal]

Congratulations indeed! And like everyone ahead of me said, a trip to the pharmacy to get a pregnancy test kit is the quick way to solve it, and afterwards a trip to a doctor.

As a ProTip, you should ideally always use a condom and the pill. People generally rely on either one or the other, but neither are 100% reliable on their own.
If a child would be really undesired in this period of your lives (which to me sounds like it is) that is the only safe way to go and taking risks will always imply a chance for both of the things to happen, regardless of their percentages.

Not to scare you here, as you wont know until you've taken the test, but going condomless and letting the guy pull or simply not even getting close to cumming inside you is not a good prevention method if you're ovulating, even if he does it successfully. Guys have a little something called precum that is like a juice that comes out way before the actual cum. This precum contains semen as well and if you're not even on the pill and this semen gets deep enough inside you while both of you are ideally fertile (especially you, ovulation and everything, since contrary to many beliefs you CANNOT get pregnant just ANY day of the month), then the odds would have been likely.

Good luck and I hope that whatever happens, it will be in your favor.

[Jazi]

Congrats on your engagement!

Everyone is right with saying that you need to take a test/go to the doc with your pregnancy concerns.. I will just say though that I once had some very strange symptoms after a visit with my SO and was very concerned that I could be pregnant... turns out that I had a bladder infection that had some very similar symptoms to some early pregnancy symptoms.. Regardless of whether it's pregnancy or something else it is best to see the Doc