Things that every to-be or married couple should have...

[Mizpah]

I think that there are two very important things that every to-be or married couple should have...

"The Five Love Languages" book by Gary Chapman.

It is truly amazing. The author counseled couples for twenty years and came away with the idea that there are five different love languages (Gifts, Quality Time, Acts of Service, Physical Touch, and Words of Affirmation) and that couples who struggle to connect or reconnect aren't struggling because they do not love each other, but they do not know how to express love in the dominant "language" of their partner. It includes the survey to see what your dominant language is, and was the best part of our pre-marriage counseling, although the results weren't all that surprising.

"The Story of Us" movie with Bruce Willis and Michelle Pfeiffer

It tells the story of Ben and Kate, married with two children, how they fell in love and how their marriage fell apart. But most importantly it shows how a couple overcame the odds.

So, I am curious. What do you think are the must-haves for married, or soon-to-be married couples?

[luna_banana]

I've read the 5 love languages, actually. My mom bought it to try to save her marriage, lol. I stumbled across it on the bookshelf, and it was really interesting. And helpful! I recommend it as well

[Èternity]

Only my opinion, but I found this to be a great book - Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships by David Schnarch Ph.D.

[Niecey]

The Five Love Languages is an awesome read. I learned a lot about myself. I want to read The Five Languages of Apology, which is also by Gary Chapman.

@ Eternity...thanks I will check that one out too.

[true_survivor_586]

the movie "fire proof" is a great movie, i watched it at a church gathering , it is very moving

[Mizpah]

I will have to check out the other Gary Chapman book! As for 'Fireproof,' I was a mite disappointed in the acting, but the message was so moving I went to see it with a group of the kids I had when I worked at the shelter, and even the toughest little gang-banger was brought to tears.

[Mizpah]

BUMP!

I think every couple should also have Shaunti Feldhan's book "For Women Only" and the one her husband wrote with her "For Men Only." They are complete common sense, things we all know about ourselves or sense about the other gender, and the Feldhans lay it all out in black-and-white. Aaron and I went to a couples' retreat his father hosted at Myrtle Beach a month after I had moved to NC, and they gave copies of the book out. LOVE them!

[13000km]

I liked fireproof as well! I watched it at some church event.
I've heard great things about Laugh your way into a Better Marriage by Mark Gungor.
It's a series of DVDs (I think) that a group of my married friends watched together. I saw how it really strengthened their marriages. (:

[13000km]

I liked fireproof as well! I watched it at some church event.
I've heard great things about Laugh your way into a Better Marriage by Mark Gungor.
It's a series of DVDs (I think) that a group of my married friends watched together. I saw how it really strengthened their marriages. (:

[Mizpah]

That's awesome to know! My in-laws bought that for us as one of our Christmas presents (father-in-law is a chaplain who does marriage retreats, so he keeps on tops of the marriage-y stuff, haha). I'll have to watch it with Aaron

[Trethsparr]

I think every couple should also have Shaunti Feldhan's book "For Women Only" and the one her husband wrote with her "For Men Only." They are complete common sense, things we all know about ourselves or sense about the other gender, and the Feldhans lay it all out in black-and-white.

Heck, yes! I've read For Women Only, and I love it, love it, love it. Highly recommend. My SO's trying to get ahold of a copy of For Men Only once I talked to him a little about what I read in my book. It was a very enlightening read!

[8983MilesofLove]

I loveeee that five languages book! We actually studied it in Beliefs and Values (religious education) in school lol! Our teacher told us all about it and told us how important it was to share it with our partners (I was only 16 at the time! I guess thats what you get at catholic schools though lol...they also gave us a whole lesson about natural family planning and NOT using protection!)

[MeeshaLenee]

I really want to get my hands on the Five Languages book.... And I love love LOVE Fireproof! I watched it with my SO on Valentine's Day and he loved it too.

I was babysitting for this friend of mine a year or so ago and I found this book, What We Wish We'd Known When We Were Newlyweds by John Bytheway. I was curious, so I read it, and I think it's a great tool to help adjust to living with your new spouse, and other advice that newlyweds, and indeed any married couple, could benefit from reading.