Bringing Guests Courtesy

[lucybelle]

So I got TWO wedding invitations on the same day (ugh I feel like an adult!) Neither of them say anything about bringing a guest. But since my SO is going to be here during both of them, I'm just going to bring him anyways. It's a good way for him to see more of the country, meet my family, and my friends.

Both weddings seem to be informal. Should I ask the couple if it's okay to bring him? I'm just worried I'll get a no. It's always easier to ask for forgiveness than permission....

[snow_girl]

Are you planning to take him to the wedding or the reception as well? If there is a dinner they need to have exact numbers so they know how many plates to pay for and have for the guests. Also lots of weddings have name tags at each seat for the dinner, might be worth it to ask instead of him showing up and not having a seat or dinner ready for him.

[lucybelle]

I was going to bring him to all parts of the wedding. I know one wedding isn't going to be a sit-down dinner. I have a feeling the other won't be either...

[Zephii]

Wedding planning is some stressful shit, so probably best to ask. Good manners never hurt anyone.

[Silviar]

If it doesn't say and guest, it's considered rude to take a date - there may be food or seating considerations you don't realize. Before doing it, I would ask as you've got an out of the country boyfriend - I mean, it's a bit different, so I don't think they'd be offended if you asked with "I know you may be tight for space, and I'll understand if you say no, but my BF will be in the country at this time and I was wondering if he'd be welcome?"

[Trethsparr]

If it doesn't say and guest, it's considered rude to take a date - there may be food or seating considerations you don't realize. Before doing it, I would ask as you've got an out of the country boyfriend - I mean, it's a bit different, so I don't think they'd be offended if you asked with "I know you may be tight for space, and I'll understand if you say no, but my BF will be in the country at this time and I was wondering if he'd be welcome?"

^Exactly this.

[mllebamako]

Yup...you've gotta ask. Even if it's informal, they are still counting on the number of people to whom they sent invites. Worst thing that can happen is they say no...

[London-FortCollins]

Yup, totally agree - its best to ask. Explain the situation, smile nicely and maybe even say something like "I know its horrendously cheeky and I wouldnt normally ask but I would really appreciate it..."

It'll also avoid any awkwardness for him. If there isnt a seat or meal or something ready for him it might make him feel very embarrassed.

[garnet]

I'm with everyone else, ask for sure.