Webcam?

[Xandergirl20]

My SO does not have a webcam, only a mic. I have been trying to make him get a webcam for a very long time and it is starting to piss me off! I wanna see him, it’s annoying. Of course I see photos and all of that stuff but it’s not the same. Every time I ask him to get one he says he ordered a computer with a built in one and he is going to wait for it to come in instead of buying a webcam. The thing is, it has been a long time and either he is lying or it takes a hell of a long time to ship a computer. I don’t understand why he won’t just buy one. :/ I get so jealous seeing my sister video chat with her SO and I I kinda wanna see him do some sexy things if you know what I mean haha. How can I make him get one without annoying him? and maybe do you think he is shy? or even hiding something. He is so confusing sometimes about his emotions.

(hope I put this thread in the right area on this forum lol)

[annb8888]

If it makes you feel better, I have a friend (a girl) whose SO is in Africa and they only chat thru YM and BBM. She doesn't want to go on webcam because of her reasons: 1. She doesn't want her SO to see her in her "worst" days/time 2. She doesn't want to put an effort to "fix" herself just to webcam with her SO.

They have been together since January (almost a year!) and they only webcammed like twice. So be patient, maybe he's extremely shy or he's not prepared to make you see him in all his glory. But you know what you can do? Both of you go on skype, and type-chat but turn YOUR webcam on even if he doesn't. Just go on voice with your cam on so he will get the feeling that there's nothing to be scared/ashamed/uncomfortable about being on webcam with his girlfriend.

Most apprehensions long distance relationships has - especially if they met online - is the fear that the other one won't like what the other one looks like. But yea, yea, that's too shallow but hey, it's the truth! Just let him feel it's fine, if he's not ready, you can wait but show him yourself by being on cam that webcams are your bestfriends

[Jgui]

Why don't you send one to him as a early christmas gift? He could be very shy and doesn't want to vid-chat. Some people feel awkward using vid-chat (i do). Give him some time and get him comfortable

[Xandergirl20]

If it makes you feel better, I have a friend (a girl) whose SO is in Africa and they only chat thru YM and BBM. She doesn't want to go on webcam because of her reasons: 1. She doesn't want her SO to see her in her "worst" days/time 2. She doesn't want to put an effort to "fix" herself just to webcam with her SO.

They have been together since January (almost a year!) and they only webcammed like twice. So be patient, maybe he's extremely shy or he's not prepared to make you see him in all his glory. But you know what you can do? Both of you go on skype, and type-chat but turn YOUR webcam on even if he doesn't. Just go on voice with your cam on so he will get the feeling that there's nothing to be scared/ashamed/uncomfortable about being on webcam with his girlfriend.

Most apprehensions long distance relationships has - especially if they met online - is the fear that the other one won't like what the other one looks like. But yea, yea, that's too shallow but hey, it's the truth! Just let him feel it's fine, if he's not ready, you can wait but show him yourself by being on cam that webcams are your bestfriends

Oh wow that really sucks, and well I will try to be patient but I can be very unpatient at times...not my best trait. Oh yes I forgot to mention I actually do turn on my webcam so he can see me, and we do talk to eachother. I think he does maybe prefer typing sometimes though, but I would rather talk. I think you may be right, he could be scared of what I would think of his appearance. That could be the case, seeming as he does not like getting photos of himself and he hates when I compliment him.

I will have to just wait I guess..grrr guys are so complicated. Do you think I should punish him in a way? okay that sounds sick but I mean not let him see me on webcam anymore until he gets one?

Thank you btw

---------- Post added at 03:22 PM ---------- Previous post was at 03:19 PM ----------

Why don't you send one to him as a early christmas gift? He could be very shy and doesn't want to vid-chat. Some people feel awkward using vid-chat (i do). Give him some time and get him comfortable

That would be a great idea, other then the fact I have no money or anything...and I dont have his address.

[yayagrl]

I actually bought my SO his webcam because if i would've waited for him to get it himself we probably would never vid chat. I say just be patient. I'm not good at it either, but sometimes it's all you can do. Have you tried to talk to him about it gently? Maybe he really is shy and is just afraid to tell you. I'm a bit shy when it comes to vid chats and I do worry about what my SO thinks about how I look, but I get over it because I want to talk to him.

[annb8888]

I think you may be right, he could be scared of what I would think of his appearance. That could be the case, seeming as he does not like getting photos of himself and he hates when I compliment him.

I will have to just wait I guess..grrr guys are so complicated. Do you think I should punish him in a way? okay that sounds sick but I mean not let him see me on webcam anymore until he gets one?

Thank you btw [COLOR="Silver"]

You're welcome. And yes, it works both ways, girls can also feel that way, like my friend. It seems like your man lacks a lil confidence in himself. Punish him by not showing yourself on webcam? Sure! it's not crazy, sometimes when I'm not in the mood for webcam, my SO would "threaten" to turn off his video until I turn mine on lol -- but he says it in a cute manner (not a confrontational) like he's trying to charm his way for me to agree. But seriously, if that charm doesn't work, you just have to open the subject and ask him why he wouldn't go on cam and assure him it's okay to tell the truth. If we're right & he's scared you wouldn't like how he looks like, assure him you don't care about physical aspects and further explain that LDRs are not relationships based on physical aspects but on emotional and compatibility. Then tell him you love him

hope that works.

[Xandergirl20]

I actually bought my SO his webcam because if i would've waited for him to get it himself we probably would never vid chat. I say just be patient. I'm not good at it either, but sometimes it's all you can do. Have you tried to talk to him about it gently? Maybe he really is shy and is just afraid to tell you. I'm a bit shy when it comes to vid chats and I do worry about what my SO thinks about how I look, but I get over it because I want to talk to him.

hmm I have never really been exactly gentle when talking to him about it. Maybe I should try and well tonight we made plans for an allnighter so when we talk through skype I will mention it.

[Xandergirl20]

You're welcome. And yes, it works both ways, girls can also feel that way, like my friend. It seems like your man lacks a lil confidence in himself. Punish him by not showing yourself on webcam? Sure! it's not crazy, sometimes when I'm not in the mood for webcam, my SO would "threaten" to turn off his video until I turn mine on lol -- but he says it in a cute manner (not a confrontational) like he's trying to charm his way for me to agree. But seriously, if that charm doesn't work, you just have to open the subject and ask him why he wouldn't go on cam and assure him it's okay to tell the truth. If we're right & he's scared you wouldn't like how he looks like, assure him you don't care about physical aspects and further explain that LDRs are not relationships based on physical aspects but on emotional and compatibility. Then tell him you love him

hope that works.

I will have to do that then haha, I think my SO is a pussy. jk Tonight I will talk to him about it, and see what he has to say. Maybe just maybe I wont have to do his punishment if he behaves himself and gets a webcam soon. I have been waiting well not to long but like 3 months, I am so glad I can actually hear his voice though. Voice is a really important thing for me, his voice is just soo sexy! lol

[annb8888]

I will have to do that then haha, I think my SO is a pussy. jk Tonight I will talk to him about it, and see what he has to say. Maybe just maybe I wont have to do his punishment if he behaves himself and gets a webcam soon. I have been waiting well not to long but like 3 months, I am so glad I can actually hear his voice though. Voice is a really important thing for me, his voice is just soo sexy! lol

Good luck! It's always always important to be open and transparent to each other. There's no other way to develop the closeness and the love between LDR partners but communicate, communicate, communicate ... unlike close distance relationships, where anything can be resolved by one touch, one look, one kiss ... LDRs are rather different - and if you ask me, I had CDRs before I had this LDR and believe me, the LDR is INTENSE. I have never looked at love this way before, where I base my feelings purely on emotions and how we get along. So yea, talk to him and be open. You both should be and when he feels secured enough, Im sure he'd get on webcam in no time.

And i agree with you, VOICE IS SEXY! it's amazing.

[Xandergirl20]

oh yes so true, I am glad I am able to be so open with him. I dont know why but I actually prefer Ldr's, I find them to be more romantic and they must truly love you to be able to wait for you. So anyways I talked to him and turns out he is basically just lazy and he has a computer he ordered that is coming in soon with a built in webcam. hehe and it was so embarassing, I mentioned this site to him. Then he asked what my user was and searched it...he read all my posts, including this one. haha and it was before I even mentioned the webcam thing.

Thanks everyone! you helped me alot.