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Desperate to meet him! (I need advice)

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    #1

    Desperate to meet him! (I need advice)

    I've been with my boyfriend for about a year and 7 months. I live in NY and he lives in Vegas. We met on xbox live. Ever since day one we've been talking non stop and we skype with each other any chance we get. We've developed hard feelings for each other. In the beginning we've talked about meeting each other, but I was honestly too scared because of my insecurities. I mentioned this to him and he reassured me that I shouldn't worry cause he loved me for all that I am (: soo about a year and couple months go by I surprised him with a plane ticket for me to see him on his birthday. He was super excited and I couldn't wait to finally meet him! I love with my parents and I mentioned to them, after the fact of buying them, that I was going to see him. Immediately my mother flipped out. As the drama went on and the days went by I tried to compromise with my parents. He have me ANY and ALL information for my mother to have and run a background check. Unfortunately, she couldn't find anything ( idk if that's true because she does like to keep me from things) so at the last possible minute they prevented me from going. I was devastated and couldn't bear to hear another word of it. We assured each other that one day we will see each other. Time is ticking and it feels like one day is taking forever. Since I'm looking to pursue my education again. I went ahead and started looking for schools in the surrounding states. I got accepted to one ... My mother knows I have a hidden agenda but I don't think she fully understands what I feel for him. I don't think she understands long distance relationships in general. I really wanna pursue this option but I'm afraid my family is going to try and prevent me from making this choice. If that happens I don't know what I would do cause me and him both are trying to find ways to make this work without upsetting my family ... I don't know if I should pursue moving closer or let my family get in the way again ...
    Tags: #lfad #help #advice
    #2
    How old are you?

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      #3
      I am 23

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        #4
        Then your parents cannot control where you go to school. They may be able to control what you do living under their roof, if you do not pay any bills, but you are over the age of 18 which makes you a legal adult in the United States. You can go to school wherever you wish. They may not help you with tuition though so if you DO go, expect to be financially responsible for everything.

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          #5
          Why can he not come to see you if your parents would not let you go to him?

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            #6
            It sounds as if you still live with your family. Perhaps moving out will make it easier to make decitions for yourself and your future.
            I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
            - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



            "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

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              #7
              I've already prepared myself to support myself financially. I've already decided to go. I'm just worried about what my parents will do if I do make this decision. He is willing to come out to see me but for a round trip ticket it's pretty expensive for him right now. Since I'm already looking to move away, I figured id make that big step in seeing him since I've already tried. Plus my mother has made it clear that she does not want him around, since she doesn't know him like I do. I've tried to get her to get to know him. Apparently me being 23 isn't important to them. They still see me as that little girl, which I understand as a parent where they're coming from, but I need to start making my own choices.

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                #8
                Originally posted by Peanutx21 View Post
                I've already prepared myself to support myself financially. I've already decided to go. I'm just worried about what my parents will do if I do make this decision. He is willing to come out to see me but for a round trip ticket it's pretty expensive for him right now. Since I'm already looking to move away, I figured id make that big step in seeing him since I've already tried. Plus my mother has made it clear that she does not want him around, since she doesn't know him like I do. I've tried to get her to get to know him. Apparently me being 23 isn't important to them. They still see me as that little girl, which I understand as a parent where they're coming from, but I need to start making my own choices.
                As am mother of an adult, I can tell you. The more you act like a responsible adult and prove to them you are growing the more they will learn to accept. They might not like it at first, for some it is very hard to cut the apron strings, but in time, it always happens. Tell them you love them very much, you respect them and appreciate all that they have done to raise you to be this responsible adult, but you are an adult. You are ready to go and spread your wings and while you prefer to have their blessing you are still going to do it without if they cannot. Tell them, you will always love them and be there for them and you understand they want to protect you from making mistakes but they are your mistakes to make if that happens and your choices in life to grow by. Show them how adult you really are and they will love you no matter what and at some point they will hopefully accept him too.
                "Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment. "
                Benjamin Franklin

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                  #9
                  Originally posted by differentcountries View Post
                  It sounds as if you still live with your family. Perhaps moving out will make it easier to make decitions for yourself and your future.
                  I agree.

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                    #10
                    Thank you , I completely agree

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