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    #1

    Met her on kik

    Hey everyone, I recently started talking to this girl on kik and I am really starting to like her. We snapchat each other all the time and she is extremely beautiful, she also says I am cute as well. I am 19 and she is 17 and we both are ok with the age difference because we get along so well. We have been talking to each other for 2 weeks or so and we ended up trading numbers and now we talk on the phone every night for hours at a time. The only problems I am having is 1. I have never done this LDR thing ever. 2. I hope she likes me as much as I like her, I don't want to be that guy that feels very strongly about her, but she doesn't feel anything toward me. 3. She always says she going to hang out at a guy friends house, and I wouldn't say im jealous but I think any guy would feel threatened if another guy is in the picture. We have talked about meeting up sometime in January because I visit my family kind of close to her. Lastly, we had recently brought up the idea of skyping each other, and I said I would. I am just worried I wont live up to her expectation or not be able to say anything and clam up. I'm very outgoing, but for some reason she makes me very nervous.

    Let me know what you guys think, thanks!
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    #2
    I think Skyping and planning a visit are great ideas! You will get the hang of Skype, and you can learn so much more about her when you can hear her talk and see her move.

    Most of us in here have not done a LDR before, so we are all in the same boat! We learn along the way.

    I am sure she likes you a lot, and try to not act jealous unless she gives you reason to do so. Talk over boundries with her but be prepared to tolerate her seeing good friends that happen to be guys. When you visit, you can even ask to meet the guy yourself.
    I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
    - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



    "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

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      #3
      Thanks for the reply! I think the biggest thing I worry about is not knowing what to say to keep the conversation going know what I mean?
      I have no problem with her talking to other guys, I would trust her and who am I to say who she can and cannot talk to. Im just confused I guess hah

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        #4
        You can google "100 questions for lovers", there will be lots of interesting things to ask her and tell about yourself.
        I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
        - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



        "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

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          #5
          just because you are talking with a camera, doesn't mean it will be any different to when you talk on the phone.

          If you manage hours on the phone, you get through the skype chat - even use the being nervous as a conversation point.

          Re her having male friends, don't make a big deal of it. my GF has males friends, I have female ones. We are not about to jump into either of their beds, just because we are friends!

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            #6
            Good insight, thanks guys. However I cant help but feel unimportant, she doesnt seem to really care about anything I do or what Im interested in. Also, whenever she goes to this guys house she always says "Im at (guys) house ill text you later" Am I silly to interpret this as me being pushed off to the side?

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              #7
              It wasn't clear whether you were actually dating or not, are you? I think it matters. For me, if i'm in a relationship my attention to people is very selective. But if i'm not I guess I feel that I have more freedom with who I talk to and how much.

              Of course it's normal to be worried about other men, but if these are friendships that she had prior to you she cannot just halt her social life, especially if you are not seriously dating yet. It might do you some good to simply ask what kind of friends they are. If they are close friends and nothing more than this should help you feel better and more accepting of her hanging out with them. If they are more than friends to her and she wants to have a legitimate relationship with you she should say something to those guys so that they know what their boundaries are. As far as the texting, it can be somewhat rude to visit someone and keep your nose in your phone the whole time, not to mention it can be difficult to be engaged in both texting convo's and face to face convo's. I don't think you should be too worried about that as of now.

              As for being that guy that really likes her but she doesn't like you, don't assume she's really into you if you can't already tell by her actions and words. Sometimes you have to come right out and ask. Don't be afraid to do so because assuming gets you no where - so whether the answer is good or bad, asking and making sure is key (if she's honest).

              Sometimes people can be absent minded when it comes to showing interest in others. They may get wrapped up in always talking about themselves rather than expressing interest but that could just be a character flaw, not that she's not into you. Also, some people really aren't ones for "small talk." It really just depends.
              "The Only Heaven I'll Be Sent To,
              Is when I'm Alone With You."

              Met: Sometime in 2016
              Started Relationship: August 9, 2017
              First Visit: December 7, 2017
              Closed the distance: February 9, 2018

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                #8
                We are not dating, and I am not quite sure how she feels about me. It seems she likes this other guy much more, about to just cut my loses, not worth hanging over.

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                  #9
                  Oh my gosh dude. Tell her you are interested in her. That you think she is beautiful. And that you'd like to be in a relationship with her and see if she is interested. Tell her you want to meet her.

                  Giving up before you even try is really dumb.

                  And who knows, maybe Christmas magic will help you?

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                    #10
                    Honestly I do tell her she is beautiful and that I like her. I don't think she takes it seriously though. I feel like whenever we talk, I'll ask her questions about certain topics, and she doesn't ask what I think. So I feel like I talk about myself 99% of the time and while she knows everything about me, I know next to nothing about her. Its just frustrating that's all.

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                      #11
                      Are you really telling her that you want a relationship with her, though, and that you are serious about it? Are you presenting it in a joking, playful manner, or have you really sat down with her and made it clear how much this means to you?

                      ~
                      It'll take a lot more than words and guns
                      A whole lot more than riches and muscle
                      The hands of the many must join as one
                      And together we'll cross the river

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                        #12
                        I have not told her I was serious about it, I like to give it more time until I am 100% sure its what I want, and that's what she wants. It would be a good idea to just come out and say how I really feel, because I think she feels the same way. I will do this tonight because we are supposed to skype and Ill let you all know how it goes. Thank you so much for the help everyone, it really means alot to me! Hope you all had a good Christmas as well.

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                          #13
                          Originally posted by Jakefromkansas View Post
                          I have not told her I was serious about it, I like to give it more time until I am 100% sure its what I want, and that's what she wants. It would be a good idea to just come out and say how I really feel, because I think she feels the same way. I will do this tonight because we are supposed to skype and Ill let you all know how it goes. Thank you so much for the help everyone, it really means alot to me! Hope you all had a good Christmas as well.
                          Hey so I was reading this just now and I'm really curious as to how this went. Did you tell her? What did she say if you don't mind me asking?

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                            #14
                            Of course, I am sorry I left you all in the dark I have been very busy. We did end of skyping, and it went just fine! But a couple days before it, she told me that the guys house she always goes over to had asked her out and they are now dating. I still talk to her because I still feel she is special, but it really hurt finding out. There is only so much I can do if I am physically not there. We do still text and call everyday however.

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Sorry to hear that it happened that way, I would personally not be able to be rejected in that way, and still talk as much as you do. But as long as you are happy you are just friends then there is nothing wrong with it.

                              Don't however sit there and 'wait' for her is my advice, find another girl to form a relationship with

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