How many times per year do you see your SO ?

[Maizhen]

Hello !

I was wondering about this particular topic. I'll try to explain clearly despite of my not-so-good english : I'm in a LDR since 3 months. We are both young (me 20 and she is 17 soon), so we don't have a job and are both students. I'll visit her soon and the trip is already damn expensive. I have some money saved on my account but i won't be able to do those kind of trip everytime. She lives in Norway, and the lifestyle there is also very.. Expensive. Plus, our vacations are really not the same at all, actually we are in vacations at the same period only on holidays (and we respectively spend it with our family) and summer. I'll try to find a job for this summer in order to get money and visit her again when i'll have the opportunity, but i'm really affraid i'll be only able to see her once a year.. It sucks and makes me kinda sad, but i guess i don't have any other choice.

Whatever, i wanted to know how many times per year (or per month) do you see your SO ? And do you have any tips in order to get the trip less expensive or, something like that (expecting a miracle haha)

[R&R]

Last year was the first year we met in person and we managed 4 trips. It should have been 5 but he missed his flight once. We are both in our 40's. I have a full-time job and he owns his own business.

I work overtime hours at my job for extra money. I plan way ahead so that there are lots of options in choosing places and that allows me go find good deals. Our place for July is already booked and paid for and I have the gas money set aside for the drive. You've got a good idea about finding a job. My 19-year old daughter goes to school full-time and she also holds down a full-time job. That way if she wants something, she can afford it.

Once a year is better than not at all. There are people on here that have been in relationships for a long time who haven't met yet. In the meantime, take advantage of calls, texting, Skype, etc to keep your communication going.

[Maizhen]

For the job thing, i'm not sure. Of course it's a good idea and i really wanna work as much as i can, but the thing is i'm only availably from the middle of july until the beginning of september. I dropped lot of resume everywhere but i mostly had negative feedback from the employers, saying they are searching for people who can starts in june.. But because of my exams, I can't.. So I will see. But yes of course, i already feel blessed to have the opportunity to see her this year.

[lovefrom2800milesaway]

I totally agree with R&R that once a year is better than none at all.

My SO and I first met 3 years ago and started off with one visit a year. We eventually worked our way up to 2 visits a year when I could save up enough money to visit him. Then slowly over the past year, we've been able to see each other 3-4 times. We're both students and have part-time jobs so I know how tough it is to be going to school, working, and trying to save up money.

One thing that really helped kick start our visits was when my SO asked for money for holidays instead of gifts. If it wasn't for that, we would probably have never met. This is assuming you guys celebrate holidays with gifts! We've also both started putting money towards a savings account. I've been doing this for years and have a good amount of money saved but even $10-20 a month goes a long way!

[Miasmata]

With a lot of number crunching and pooling our finances for it, we managed 3 visits from him to me and 1 from me to him. It was a very lucky situation though and a bunch of factors had to come together to make that possible. I made money with my art and invested all of that into the visits. We both did what we could to make it work, and thankfully, it worked out well. Focusing on your communication and wellbeing over the distance and seeing what you can do to make visits happen is the best way to go about it.

[R&R]

Do you go away for school and come home for summer? In the area I live, we have a lot of students come home for summer and they are rehired each year for summer help. Then they have part time jobs where they go to school. I mean, nothing fancy - grocery stores, coffee shops, etc but it's some sort of an income.

[Maizhen]

I'm really close to my university, but where i am it's quite different. You have to search and apply every year for a summer job. I'd love to take a student job too, but i'm a law student and it takes me so much time already, next year will be even more difficult, i fear i wouldn't have enough time. I'm worried about the money issue, but i guess i can't complain and have to deal with the situation. I just hope to find something for summer and it would be already perfect

[differentcountries]

We are in the lucky position that my work allows me to go visit him once a month to do my studies, so I travel 10 times I year, he comes to me once a year (he was just here 32 days).

How I get money; I work. And I spend very little money on personal stuff - I don't eat out much, I hardly ever drink alcohol in my country, I almost never buy clothes (soon all my clothes will be bought in Turkey!), I don't have any expensive hobbies (I just go to yoga, I have a good deal with a yoga studio). I have become very stingy with money! Also, I all the time look for good deals on travels, and ideed good deals overall.

I usually travel with Norwegian airlines, Saturday to Saturday, to his city in Turkey. Often I get quite cheap tickets - flying in Norway if often more expensive than travelling to him! I used Norwegian airlines to buy tickets for SO as well. I don't know where in France and Norway you live, at least from capital to capital you can get VERY cheap tickets on certain days. You might want to check it out if you have not already; https://www.norwegian.com/fr/

[Maizhen]

Oh thank you for the website, i've never heard about it until now

I'm from nothern France but hopefully it's not a real problem to go to Paris in order to take a fly. She lives really close to Stavanger, and well usually the prices are around 280 euros for the round trip. It's a bit expensive (+ the hotel, the food and so on). About it, do you have any idea of how much a whole week in Norway would cost me ? I have already booked the hotel so i'm only talking about the money i'll need to eat, to take the transports ect.. ? I've heard that 400 euros should be okay but i'm not sure

[BlueCat]

My SO and I get to see each other 0-2 times a year. But our situation is a little different since we've had a lot of long visits. Our shortest visit was 2 1/2 months, and longest one was a year. Most were 3 months, some were 6 months. However the long visits have also meant long separations, so I didn't get to see him at all last year, and by the time this separation is over it will probably be longer than a year and seven months.

In terms of saving money, shop around for flights is the main thing, experiment with what days you would leave or what days you look for flights. You don't need to to a whole lot of stuff to make it an enjoyable visit either. If you can't afford to go places, that doesn't matter, stay home and watch movies or play games together, go for walks etc. Living at home really helps with saving, I'm not a party person and not much of a spender so I always found it easy to save since I don't spend needlessly and don't lose any money on alcohol etc :P Obviously staying with her and her family would be cheaper, but if that's not an option then I suppose shopping around for good hotel deals is important.

[abna1]

We see each other once or twice a year. We have similar time off from university, so we try to fit a visit in, if possible.

I also have a part-time job alongside uni. It's been stressful, but it does help a lot . I hope you'll be able to find something in the summer. Cafés, restaurants and ice cream parlours always seem to be hiring in the summer months. My fingers are crossed for you

[snow]

Get yourself outta there and try to find a job, try applying for part-time jobs now and see if you can find anything that will help you money. I started working 8 hours a week when I was still in school and it helped significantly to pay for the trips!

We have seen each other quite a lot, 3 times within one year and then closed the distance the next

[Ahava]

3 to 4 times. We may get to see each other more often than many, but then again because of his work we can't have long holidays together.
The longest visit has been a week, all the others long weekends.

[differentcountries]

Oh thank you for the website, i've never heard about it until now

I'm from nothern France but hopefully it's not a real problem to go to Paris in order to take a fly. She lives really close to Stavanger, and well usually the prices are around 280 euros for the round trip. It's a bit expensive (+ the hotel, the food and so on). About it, do you have any idea of how much a whole week in Norway would cost me ? I have already booked the hotel so i'm only talking about the money i'll need to eat, to take the transports ect.. ? I've heard that 400 euros should be okay but i'm not sure

My mum is from Stavanger and I have been there a lot, it is really nice there 400 Euros to cover food etc sounds ok. It really depends on what you want to do while you are here. Eating out and alcohol is quite expensive in Norway in general. Tourist stuff can be costly, but in the Stavanger area you can get around by bus easily to go to Sola and other nice places by the sea, or even just stroll along the harbour in the city. Wish you a nice trip

[Maizhen]

My mum is from Stavanger and I have been there a lot, it is really nice there 400 Euros to cover food etc sounds ok. It really depends on what you want to do while you are here. Eating out and alcohol is quite expensive in Norway in general. Tourist stuff can be costly, but in the Stavanger area you can get around by bus easily to go to Sola and other nice places by the sea, or even just stroll along the harbour in the city. Wish you a nice trip

Thank you, i hope it will be good