We had originally planned ML's visit to start in the end of June and go through August. A variety of circumstances delayed her making the trip, and I visited her at her home for a weekend at that time, and left unsure that we could pull it off this summer. Then as things started shaping up, she was able to commit to a job in August here. She booked her ticket, and arrived July 30.
Now things here had gotten complicated with my boss falling ill and spending an extended time in the hospital. We had planned on doing a trip as a paid cooking team into the mountains of Wyoming on the way home for her. With my bosses health at that time questionable, I cancelled that gig, and ML extended her time with the local employer.
Over the next 29 days she worked 4 days a week while I continued my usual 5 1/2 day a week career. She stayed with me in my house, and when my children stayed with me we had 4 people there. It was an exciting time as my children had 2 weeks of exhibiting at the county fair, my parents next door hosted my mothers siblings for more than a few days, culminating in a 3 generation BBQ the weekend after the fair, and I had commitments to coach a running group every Sunday morning.
Fitting in with the Family
ML was her happy and gregarious self with my parents, and seemed to really get along well with my mother, even though my Mom is still quite close with my first wife. They actually kinda seemed to bond a little bit, even though my mother is much more introverted than ML. I was a little worried that my mother would be standoffish, but she really seemed to make an effort.
The first thing ML did was show my mother all her lacy delicates drying in the bathroom on the shower rod and every towel rack in the bathroom, since I did not have a clothes line or drying rack (as a guy I never NEEDED one). They had a good laugh at my expense. I bought her a drying rack the next day. ML was able to help my mother prepare for the incoming family by cooking and her Italian heritage shone in that arena.
Meeting the Ex wife
Four days after arriving, ML met my first wife at the fair as we were headed to the horse races. She was seated with our children outside the exhibition area as we walked by. My kids had met ML and were staying at my house the night previous. We were dressed above average since it was "Ladies Hat Day", and ML looked HOT. I introduced all the kids friends and my ex. She just gave a nod and never smiled....Which is her typical response with people. No major blowup. I'm calling it a win. We still had a great day at the races.
Weekend Adventures
Over the next couple of weeks I took ML to her first rodeo, she was on hand and assisted my committee for the Team Sorting Contest the next morning. Then she accompanied my youngest daughter mother and I to my nephew's birthday at a lake 2 hours drive away. ML really bonded with my youngest daughter playing card games on the trip, and my mother got to see how good she was with kids. My sisters met her for the first time, and she fit in great with their kids. Incidentally my youngest sister's 4 and 2 yo always seemed to annoy my first wife, while ML just loved them. Another good sign.
The next weekend our running group traveled to the coast for an overnight camping trip and training run. It was a romantic drive up the coast, complete with sunset and stargazing during a meteor shower on a rare clear night on the coast. ML got to know my running group and we cooked them breakfast after our Sunday morning run.
The third weekend was the weekend of the family party. This side of the family really didn't know my first wife so there was no feeling of awkwardness. Heck one of my uncles had not been in the States in nearly 20 years. He probably didn't know the difference.
The fourth weekend I booked a couple inflatable kayaks for Sunday afternoon and we floated/paddled 3 miles down the river and picnicked along the way. We did that after a morning training run and it was a long, but enjoyable day.
In between all these "dates" I remember most fondly some of the "moments" of everyday life during those days.
Tuesday morning I drove ML to the airport. Earlier I'd booked round trip tickets for the end of September for a weekend in the Northwest. So we have started the countdown to next time. We are already plotting Thanksgiving and Christmas plans. Having that plan makes me happy despite the distance.
Now things here had gotten complicated with my boss falling ill and spending an extended time in the hospital. We had planned on doing a trip as a paid cooking team into the mountains of Wyoming on the way home for her. With my bosses health at that time questionable, I cancelled that gig, and ML extended her time with the local employer.
Over the next 29 days she worked 4 days a week while I continued my usual 5 1/2 day a week career. She stayed with me in my house, and when my children stayed with me we had 4 people there. It was an exciting time as my children had 2 weeks of exhibiting at the county fair, my parents next door hosted my mothers siblings for more than a few days, culminating in a 3 generation BBQ the weekend after the fair, and I had commitments to coach a running group every Sunday morning.
Fitting in with the Family
ML was her happy and gregarious self with my parents, and seemed to really get along well with my mother, even though my Mom is still quite close with my first wife. They actually kinda seemed to bond a little bit, even though my mother is much more introverted than ML. I was a little worried that my mother would be standoffish, but she really seemed to make an effort.
The first thing ML did was show my mother all her lacy delicates drying in the bathroom on the shower rod and every towel rack in the bathroom, since I did not have a clothes line or drying rack (as a guy I never NEEDED one). They had a good laugh at my expense. I bought her a drying rack the next day. ML was able to help my mother prepare for the incoming family by cooking and her Italian heritage shone in that arena.
Meeting the Ex wife
Four days after arriving, ML met my first wife at the fair as we were headed to the horse races. She was seated with our children outside the exhibition area as we walked by. My kids had met ML and were staying at my house the night previous. We were dressed above average since it was "Ladies Hat Day", and ML looked HOT. I introduced all the kids friends and my ex. She just gave a nod and never smiled....Which is her typical response with people. No major blowup. I'm calling it a win. We still had a great day at the races.
Weekend Adventures
Over the next couple of weeks I took ML to her first rodeo, she was on hand and assisted my committee for the Team Sorting Contest the next morning. Then she accompanied my youngest daughter mother and I to my nephew's birthday at a lake 2 hours drive away. ML really bonded with my youngest daughter playing card games on the trip, and my mother got to see how good she was with kids. My sisters met her for the first time, and she fit in great with their kids. Incidentally my youngest sister's 4 and 2 yo always seemed to annoy my first wife, while ML just loved them. Another good sign.
The next weekend our running group traveled to the coast for an overnight camping trip and training run. It was a romantic drive up the coast, complete with sunset and stargazing during a meteor shower on a rare clear night on the coast. ML got to know my running group and we cooked them breakfast after our Sunday morning run.
The third weekend was the weekend of the family party. This side of the family really didn't know my first wife so there was no feeling of awkwardness. Heck one of my uncles had not been in the States in nearly 20 years. He probably didn't know the difference.
The fourth weekend I booked a couple inflatable kayaks for Sunday afternoon and we floated/paddled 3 miles down the river and picnicked along the way. We did that after a morning training run and it was a long, but enjoyable day.
In between all these "dates" I remember most fondly some of the "moments" of everyday life during those days.
- Waking up to my horse nickering and looking at us through my bedroom patio door. (He got quite an eye full some mornings)
- Cooking together, shopping together, cleaning the house together, watching about 2.5 hours of television total the ENTIRE month.
- Watching her captivate my work colleagues with her outgoing personality. My bosses even mentioned it in conversation days later.
- Looking out the kitchen door to see ML jumping on the trampoline laughing and giggling with my youngest daughter.
- Meeting each other at the door, after work, with a cold cocktail or beer when one of us arrived home earlier.
- Watching her engage with my teenager who seems to try to be minimally communicative. She drew her out of her shell more than any one else has.
- Walking around the ranch and making me appreciate things I took for granted
- Seeing the joy in her face as she petted my horse, and later rode him
- Spending hours of windshield time together in the car just talking.
- Feeling like a family when we all sat down to a home cooked meal we'd all assisted with. My kids even arranged flowers in the kitchen and on the dining room table.
Tuesday morning I drove ML to the airport. Earlier I'd booked round trip tickets for the end of September for a weekend in the Northwest. So we have started the countdown to next time. We are already plotting Thanksgiving and Christmas plans. Having that plan makes me happy despite the distance.
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