We're Both Nervous, Meeting in January

[HoldingHope]

After being together for about four months now and talking for five, we've finally started planning a time for us to meet in person. I offered to drive over winter break.

Our plan is for me to drive down on the 4th of January and then drive home on the 12th, giving us a good week together. I'll be leaving early that Friday and driving the whole day. It'll be about a 12.5 hour drive, maybe 13. We're still trying to figure out how we can get me permission to park in the apartments he lives in, since we don't want my car to be towed, but hopefully they'll get back to us soon.

We're both excited to see each other, he has friends that want to meet me, and he's been trying to think of things we can do while I'm down there. Most of it would be pretty relaxed, but he does have a few places he wants to go I think. But as excited as I am, as much as I want to finally be able to really see him, hug him and hear his voice, I'm still incredibly nervous.

This will be the farthest I've been from home on my own. On top of that, I love him, and I'm worried about whether our feelings for each other will change when we see how we are together in person. I only hope that things go well and maybe our feelings can grow deeper instead of less. He means a lot to me, but we've really only seen each other in one setting, and that's on FaceTime in our bedrooms pretty much.
That being said, this meeting is crucial for us to know if the compatibility extends into everyday life. So even though I'm worried, I know it has to happen... and I'm willing to risk it if it means the chance we realize we actually go well together. I can't imagine anyone else I'd rather spend the beginning of the new year with.

He loves me too, and he's admitted that he's also nervous, but that he's excited and really wants me to come. I'm trying to hold on to that as much as I can. I just hope everything goes well and that we are just as good, or even better together, in person.

Still, I wish I could stop these nerves. >_<

[Floating_cookie]

Meeting in person for the first time is always going to be a mixture of emotions. It's understandable that your nervous about the travel, it is a very long way to drive, especially by yourself. I think it's important that you check in with yourself. Make sure that you are comfortable with this plan, whether that's driving all the way there, staying there for a week, being away from your family. It's a big jump in your relationship and if you're uncomfortable with any of those factors I would reconsider it. You need to make sure that you're okay with this because it can lead to other fights and problems. Always go with your gut feeling when it's about your safety.

About knowing if you're right for each other, that will just come with time. For the first visit, I think (my personal experience) you're going to be so excited and happy that it'll be hard to know if what you feel is real, but I think after awhile and more visits you'll definitely start being confident in what you feel. Just make sure your true with yourself and him. It makes things 10x easier when you're both open about your feelings after the first visit, whether it's good or bad.

Good luck in your visit! Have a safe journey!

Floating_cookie

[Ejoriah]

Sorry to be this person, but make sure that:

1. Your family or a trusted friend knows where you're going and with whom (boyfriend's name, address, contact details)
2. You have enough money to comfortably last you through your stay, including
3. You have a plan B as far as where to go and stay in case things don't go well with your boyfriend.

It's an important step to take, but beyond feeling excited for the progression of the relationship please remember to stay safe and plan for the worst case scenario.

[HoldingHope]

Just an update, but after a generous donation by a family member I can afford a plane ticket, so instead of driving down there I will now be flying.

My roundtrip flight has been booked and I leave the 4th and come back on the 13th instead because we wanted to squeeze in as much time together as possible before second semester starts- although I guess it's funny that we have no idea how this will go, but we're assuming we'll both want that extra time. I guess that's a good sign though.
Also, I'm definitely comfortable with the trip. I have no reservations about flying to see him and staying with him for a week. He's been nothing but considerate and I know I won't have to feel unsafe at any time. I'm actually rather glad to have the chance for quality time on our own. I think this will be a really good chance to see how we do sharing a space together; could be a good indicator of any potential futures where we're still together.

Also thank you for the caution- my family knows where I'm going, who I'm staying with and have his address and the name of the apartments in case anything happens. All of my friends know as well, so this trip is no secret of course. I'll have enough money to afford food every day and money for taking Lyft or Uber since I won't have my car now.

[HoldingHope]

I just wanted to update this because I have now met him, and it went well I think.

I don't know his thoughts about the visit, but at least for me, I really enjoyed being able to spend time with him even if some of it was just sitting around his apartment watching youtube and other things.
He met me at the airport and we just hugged and started talking, then held hands, and the first night I was there we had our first kiss. It didn't even feel odd despite never having 'met' him before. I also met two of his friends and they were fun to be around. We were basically together for over 240 hours until I finally flew home yesterday. I'm unsure how we'll get back into our old texting habits following the visit, because we haven't really texted at all in the last two days. I figure we both might just be settling back into our usual routines before we start texting consistently again.

Regardless, I love him, and I nearly cried on my way to the airport. He gave me a jacket he's had for a long time and it's hanging on my door now. I can only hope I made a good impression while I was down there and that our relationship can continue from here, because I want to see him again and I want to keep this going, and now we know that we're decent together in person.

[Atlantic Crossroads]

So pleased to hear it went well. If he's given you a jacket he has had for a long time...I'd say that is a positive sign.
He may have given it as an 'excuse' to see you again.

[Loveg4k]

Any news

That sounds amazing! I hope it's going well; anything new? I feel the same going in to meet my love in a couple weeks and I'm nervous and excited just hoping all will go well because I feel the same.

I just wanted to update this because I have now met him, and it went well I think.

I don't know his thoughts about the visit, but at least for me, I really enjoyed being able to spend time with him even if some of it was just sitting around his apartment watching youtube and other things.
He met me at the airport and we just hugged and started talking, then held hands, and the first night I was there we had our first kiss. It didn't even feel odd despite never having 'met' him before. I also met two of his friends and they were fun to be around. We were basically together for over 240 hours until I finally flew home yesterday. I'm unsure how we'll get back into our old texting habits following the visit, because we haven't really texted at all in the last two days. I figure we both might just be settling back into our usual routines before we start texting consistently again.

Regardless, I love him, and I nearly cried on my way to the airport. He gave me a jacket he's had for a long time and it's hanging on my door now. I can only hope I made a good impression while I was down there and that our relationship can continue from here, because I want to see him again and I want to keep this going, and now we know that we're decent together in person.