First time here

[Thebeerman1212]

Just found this site and am posting my first thread. Going to take some time getting around so bear with me

[Redheart14]

Hi and welcome this site is great and very supportive.

[Thebeerman1212]

Thanks, going through a rough patch in my 8 month relationship and have reached out to see what help there is. Navigating around a new site is always difficult.

[Redheart14]

What’s going on?

[Thebeerman1212]

I told my SO that I was feeling vulnerable and a little insecure, which was not clever as I know she's stressed at the moment having just moved house,she's working long hours and her mom is sick. I also said shes' not been very chatty at the moment and replies to my messages with one word answers and if I don't initiate comunication I hear nothing from her.

[Redheart14]

How did she respond to that?

[Thebeerman1212]

Not well. She that she's tired, busy getting the new house set up, stressed, dealing with contractors, fucking tired and her mum is sick. She said my insecurities are not because because of her and are patterns I've developed and I have to rein in. She has given me no reason to doubt her. She didn't appreciate getting abushed by my message and it was a complete bummer to get it at the end of a long day. She said that I've put her under untold pressure buy saying I would move to be near her, and telling her I love her and on top of that her dog died. She doesn't have time to stop and think and I get upset because she's busy and I need to reassure myself. In my defence I never knew how busy she was or how tired and stressed she was as she never told me. If she had told me I would have thought about things totally differently and not sent that message and given her some space and time and considered how she was feeling. I can't see how I'm totally at fault for this and as she won't talk on the phone I had to send an email to which she is going to mull over!!!!! Meanwhile for 4 days I've no idea where I stand and we're meant to be going on vacation together in 9 days.

[Redheart14]

Communication is the biggest thing in a ldr. Maybe you need to book in a time to call or FaceTime. Sometimes in text or email tone can be interpreted where there was none intended. Everyone gets busy, but if you book in a time surely some time can be made for that. Telling her you love her put pressure on her? I would have thought that would have been reassuring to hear that during a stressful time in your life. What were the plans to move to her? Why did they fall through?