It doesn't feel like my choice anymore. Between my parents both saying "Don't have sex", my sister having sex, my boyfriend wanting sex, me kind of wanting sex, but also wanting to wait... I JUST DON'T KNOW HOW I FEEL! Is that okay with everyone? I'm sick and tired of people a) assuming I've had sex because we've been going out for so long, and b) nagging me about how it's not a big deal, because it is a big deal to me! Obviously some people are supportive of my decision to wait, but I don't know anymore... I want to have sex but I really want to wait. I know I'm not ready yet... Even with my friends joking around and saying "Do something new and exciting this weekend!" or "How long have you been going out? (almost 11 months) And you haven't had sex yet?! You don't know what you're missing" is really annoying. I wish people would just respect what I want instead of trying to push their ideas on me (even if they are joking). Not to mention my parents both making comments from the flat out "NO SEX!" to "I don't want to hear about any 'hanky-panky'." Seriously?! They were my age, do they really think that they can control whether or not I have sex? The whole thing is very frusterating to me! Plus because of all of the mixed signals (from everyone around me and myself) I don't know how I feel about it!

End rant