Anyways, I finally opened up and told him what I worried about. I told him I worried that if we got married, where would we have the wedding? In the States? In Costa Rica? Would we have to have 2? Could his family fly up to the States? I'd want to do the planning with my mom and sister for sure. Plus I have a huge party-ing family and lots of party-ing friends that would HAVE to be there. He laughed and asked if there was anything serious I worried about. I was like THAT IS SERIOUS!
But I finally told him I also worry about having kids. If we have kids where would we live? In the States? In Costa Rica? He's told me he doesn't want to leave Costa Rica anymore. But I wouldn't want my kids growing up without knowing the States like I do. Without being close to my family. My extended family all lives in upstate NY, I was raised in the south. It was a good 12-13 hour drive to get up there and we only visited once a year. If that. I really wished I had grown up closer to my family. I finally had an aunt who lived an hour away and we hung out all the time. It was great. I want my kids to be close to THEIR family. Then I told him my plan to put my potential children in an American schedule school here so that way I can send them up to my mom's house over the summer. It'd be great because 1- I wouldn't have to deal with kids for 3 months, and 2- They'd get to hang out with their gringo family.
So after spilling the beans, I was surprised to see that my SO was calm and collective. Even with the talk of marriage AND kids. Which I was never really sure that he wanted either. He said he liked my plans with the potential kids. And that he would only invite 10 or 15 people to a potential wedding, so it wouldn't be a big deal to travel. (though I still worry about everyone getting visas!) He even mentioned that after finishing his degree in the next 2ish years (he's been in school FOREVER!) he'd think about quitting his job and finding a new one. Possibly in the USA. He already knows a company in PA that looks for Spanish-speaking engineers. Man I would LOVE to move back to the States. I love it here, but the States is my home. Ya know?
In the end, I was really shocked to see my SO so cool about "the future". And it really made me feel good that he was okay talking about it.
Reaching a compromise is pretty much as satisfactory as anything can be in a relationship when it comes to serious stuff. When you're on the same page about the big things in your life it's so easy to not stress about it! I like that school idea! In here kids have 9 weeks off every summer so I guess our kids will be going to Wales for summers then!