With the help of a couple people on this site (you know who you are), my SO and a convo with a close family member, I made THE call on Friday. The nice lady on the phone said she would refer me to a Councillor and that he would be calling within two business days. Nothing yet but it was the weekend. The load taken off my shoulders just from making that call is something I can't explain. I'm a little nervous and scared about what's to come but I know that it'll be worth it. It's a step in the right direction. I need to go back to being ME. We'll see what comes from it.

I decided that I would have a ME weekend and I did. I relaxed, cleaned, watched Doctor Who, played some video games and exercised. It was really nice but one thing I did realize is that this roommate thing is getting long. My life revolves a little too much around my roommate. It shouldn't and I kind of hate it. She is kind of "needy" of me. She isn't very independent and makes me feel bad if I'm not always "with" her. If I'm by myself in my room she comes in and makes herself comfortable. If she's watching tv, alone she'll ask me if I'm gonna watch with her. If I'm at home and she's been at work all day she asks me if I'm making her dinner...stuff like that. And of course with my low self esteem I find myself doing those things I don't want to be doing because I feel like a horrible person or friend if I don't.

I really need to learn to think more about ME and the things that I want. I have a really hard time with this. I worry about what everyone else thinks or wants before me. I hope that seeking help will provide me with some tools to learn how to put myself first. I'm not doing that right now, and I'm really not happy.

So, good things are coming I hope. Time for a change!
More to follow I'm sure...lol