Before heading up to the cottage for the weekend on Friday, I, for some reason, told myself I could MAYBE tell my mom and my sister what's been going on in my life these days. This was probably a bad idea because it brought on what I think was a little panic attack. I felt overwhelmed and scared. Anyway I ended up talking myself out of it.

When I went to therapy today I did a lot more talking than I did the past couple times. I guess he's pushing me to talk more which is good but it's HARD. But he makes me talk. I'm convinced most of it doesn't make sense but he seems to kinda get it! lol So I brought up that I wasn't able to tell my family about my stuff and we talked about that quite a bit. Basically my family does not talk about their "issues". We keep all that shit bottled up and well clearly that doesn't work for me. lol He suggested that, I write my mother a letter but don't give it to her. Tell her what's going on in my life and what I need in return. Whether it's support or just someone to listen. But that I don't lay any blame; just explain what is going on. He said that in itself can be a huge load off my shoulders. So that's my task for next week. Who knew therapy would bring homework! lol

I'm getting more and more comfortable with him. I did cry but not as much as the two last times I was there. So that's good. He also said that he could already see progress with me and the way I communicate. That's good right? lol I feel somewhat better. I've had a couple bouts of anxiety but I was able to work through them rather than let them build.

I think I'm heading the right direction. I just have to keep moving forward!
More to follow! Thanks for listening!