maybe im the one losing interest.....
maybe im the one who wants to break up before we meet...
maybe you are the one staying strong and i refuse to be...
When we broke it off the first time I could never stop thinking about you. I'd see you everywhere I go....
but now that we are together.....idk what it is...it just feels different. .....you don't deserve to deal with my selfishness. Honestly, im starting to believe that maybe I lack the maturity to be in any relationship.
I care for you so much.....and I can't imagine what our future could possibly be anymore. I don't want to hold on to that possibility anymore when I don't even have a clear picture of our present.
So many highs and lows.....
I'm so tired. ..
im so confused. ...
why go through all this when I can find a guy right here in my own city? looking forward to a text or a call from one person?
And I want to stick around and hope things get better. ..
maybe he is doing the same? what if he wants to break up too??
*sigh*
I've never been in a healthy relationship. Not one time. which is why I think have all these worries and I don't know how to control it. He knows about my past and the guys I have dated. Unfortunately, I think
I'm carrying around some of that baggage still.
He hasn't done anything at all. He is good to me and he tries to do his best. He is everything I could ever ask for......
I won't leave him even though I have these thoughts. I'll keep fighting and I think that's what brought him back to me. I just need to get myself together. Thank you so much heavenly.