I know I should be past these kinds of things, but apparently I'm not. So my SO hasn't left yet. He is going to Texas first, then Indiana. He has a female friend in Texas (strictly plutonic, and engaged) who I am having trouble with. They were chatting last night on Facebook and I noticed he had another tab up about codependency and asked about it. He said he was correcting her on misusing a phrase so I asked again what about. He started acting shady and question dodging which is very unlike him.

Previously in our relationship I have gotten very drunk and looked through his phone and found a conversation where he talked to her about telling me he loved me. She was shocked thinking he was going to end things (which he had thought about because things were going really poorly for him and when he gets close to people he gets scared so it was a double hit basically). Upon further pushing he admitted he went from thinking about that to saying he loved me but he meant it.

Okay so, skip ahead. While I was drunk the first time, still wrong. This time, EVEN WORSE. I was sober. I was nosy. I invaded his privacy. I hate it because I found where he talked to her about having the talk with me about leaving and saying that we were going to stay together and go long distance. She then said that she thought he wasn't interested in long distance and assumed I would end things (which he did, he has a negativity problem). She then said that he wasn't the type of person who could do that and all this other negative stuff. He responded "well it's not like I have girls lined up for me".

So here's my problem. I honestly believe this is the person he airs his negativity with so all she gets is the negative. And she is also a negative person I suspect. She doesn't know me or much about me. Also I know he didn't expect a good reaction from me when he had that conversation with me and when I talked to him about long distance he expressed interest. We even started talking about the future, etc, etc. We've discussed boundaries. And I think he may have just been trying to get her off his back. But I worry. I worry that he is going to spend two months in the same state as her hanging out with her (which is within our boundaries) and her negativity is going to be a problem. I had bad friend influence mess with my previous LDR. I'm now feeling very insecure about the relationship and how in this he really is.

Either way, I can't say anything, because he hasn't technically done anything wrong. While I have done something very very wrong. So I am now stuck with my worries and don't know how to talk to him.