This was the answer of my ex about me and the baby. It was really painful when I read it as tears began. This is the only time that it made me realized to stop hoping about my child having a complete family. I already said sorry to him if I made sacrifices...my personal happiness because I choose to give life to this blessing.

What also horrified me is when he asked me what do I want. If I want his money. Maybe if he told it to me personally, i would love to slap his face so many times. It is an insult! Heartless as what my friends have said. Maybe I am Filipina. And aware that other nationalities have this thinking that being in an interracial relationship will be their way out of poverty. But I think he forgot that I am licensed and practicing in medical field.

Maybe its really time to let go of the possibilities of hoping. That I must save my respect for myself and most especially for my lovechild. I have had enough. I need to focus on the future even all by myself. I need not to blame myself about choosing the baby over him. In my heart, i have given all for my ex. If leaving us will make him happy and worry fee then I need to let go.

I would like to end this post from Mariah Carey's song Through The Rain...

I can make it through the rain

I can stand up once again on my own
And I know that I'm strong enough to mend
And every time I feel afraid I hold tighter to my faith
And I live one more day and I make it through the rain