I Wonder

R&R started a blog post I Wonder
June 5, 2015, 06:14 PM
I Wonder

So my SO is on his way home. He was here for 5 days this trip. He spent the time putting new windows in for my parents. We didn't get much time alone together and didn't get even part of a day to go do anything. It was good bonding time for him and my dad especially.

I dropped him off at my parents house this morning and headed to work. This is the second time that there were no tears when we said good-bye. I wonder if there's something "wrong" with me because I'm no longer crying when we part. Even before there were some tears but nothing overly dramatic. I see the posts of "I cried for days" and "It takes me forever to get back on track after a visit" and "I can't sleep now that we're apart" and I don't know if I'm just not that dramatic or if I just have so much control over my emotions that I don't let myself get that way.

I'm home, watching tv and relaxing after a long week. I miss him but I find it so easy to just get myself right back into my routine. I love him and look forward to closing the distance and spending the rest of our lives together. I know everyone is different but I really do wonder about my lack of reaction sometimes.....
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8 comments
- #6
  
  80anthea commented
  
  June 6, 2015, 04:02 PM
  
  Editing a comment
  
  We both always cry and I'm not really a crier normally. I absolutely hate leaving him at the airport and usually have a little cry again as the airplane takes off. I do bounce back pretty quickly though and don't spend days or weeks in mourning. Tbh if I knew I'd see him again in less than a month I probably wouldn't cry, it's the uncertainess that usually gets me. I also really don't sleep well without him but it's because I'm usually a terrible sleeper and the only time I do actually sleep well is when I'm with him. I often joke that his chest hair must be laced with tranquiliser!
  
  Everyone is different though!
- #7
  
  Zapookie commented
  
  June 8, 2015, 07:06 PM
  
  Editing a comment
  
  I think the only reason I ever cried was because I was never sure when I'd see him again and knew it would at least be another 7 months apart. I think if I had had multiple frequent visits, I'd get over crying pretty quickly because it would become a sort of routine, you know? I think its a normal reaction.
- #8
  
  differentcountries commented
  
  June 9, 2015, 07:04 AM
  
  Editing a comment
  
  I cried a lot more in the beginning when we didn't really have a scedule for visits. And then again sometimes I cry when I leave because I am sad, but I don't feel ruled by the sadness. At other times I cry and I feel absolutely horrible because I know we will have to be so very clever to close the distance and I don't always feel that clever, haha! I will say now I am more or less used to travelling and being apart. I have lots of other things to use my energy on, not just him. SO is funny, btw, he never cries but he does the "mancry" of looking like a sad, lost puppy... But he too used to be more upset before we got into a routine. Some visits are not dramatic at all, they feel just like...life. I think it is normal to cry and normal to be stoic about it, there is no right or wrong.
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I Wonder