Really?

Silviar started a blog post Really?
November 18, 2010, 10:40 AM
Really?

What is with the slew of posts lately saying 'don't judge me' even as they ask for advice?

By definition for asking for advice, some judging is going to happen. It'd be better if they said 'if you don't have helpful advice, keep it to yourself'.

Don't get me wrong, rudeness is unacceptable, but I suspect some people just don't like hearing opinions that don't coincide with the answers they want.
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15 comments
- #13
  
  Zephii commented
  
  November 18, 2010, 08:11 PM
  
  Editing a comment
  
  *laughs* that's the spirit!
- #14
  
  Heather commented
  
  November 19, 2010, 01:53 AM
  
  Editing a comment
  
  Of course we all go through the phase of only really paying attention to what we want to hear and tend to get pissy when someone gives us advice that we don't want to hear. I personally appreciate any advice I can get, whether it's something I want to hear or not. I appreciate it anything that comes my way.. BEGGERS CAN'T BE CHOOSERS!
- #15
  
  Lunar Snow commented
  
  November 19, 2010, 04:51 AM
  
  Editing a comment
  
  You raise a good concern and I do think the dynamic of the forum is changing (and now that it is growing, I can barely keep track of what everyone is up to, let alone maintain my own threads! Eep!). I'm not sure if I have ever said "don't judge me" exactly, but if I have said anything of the like, it would be because I had some trepidation about receiving an onslaught of rude comments or starting an explosive argument--many of us get enough grief and stress about our LDRs and don't need more of it when we come here for help (and if it is just a case of being annoyed by advice that doesn't fit in our paradigm, then even the best of adults has an off day and can be reactive about things). So, it could also be that some people have experienced rude comments (or at least read them) and feel nervous about posting things. Coming to the website, I am looking for people in a similar situation and with all sorts of advice (whether having different opinions or not), but that advice should be offered in a constructive and useful manner, with consideration that it is difficult for us to know each other's lives exactly beyond the scenarios we are presented with in posts and, thus, advice needs to be gathered, considered, and fit to the situation.
  
  Phew! Anyway, I hope that many of you continue posting and responding to threads--it seems unfortunate that you feel discouraged, when I think that all of you have made really useful contributions.
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Really?