Hey guys! I've been wanting to update this for a long time but never really had the time to do it.

School and work
I am back in school (finally) for probably the last time this semester as I am finally graduating in December! Yes it's official now since I finally got myself an internship. It's nothing like what I wanted in the beginning, but at least it's something. I am interning at a domestic violence shelter for women and I just started today. It was pretty boring as all first days are and I just watched a video and filled out paper work. I can't wait to do some actual work since this seems pretty interesting so far. All in all this plus school and my job have made me pretty freaking busy which I like. It's good to have something to take my mind off things.

My love life and my ex
Ah the part you've all been waiting for. And to answer what you've been thinking I am still single...sort of. Remember how I mentioned something about going on a date a couple of weeks ago? Well nothing happened after that. I never heard from him after that and I am ok with that. I never really felt anything for this guy at all honestly. There was just no connection.

I went on another date with a different guy about a week ago and while I loved his personality and the fact that he is completely smitten with me, he is just physically not my type. For one thing he was short. Like really really short lol. I have nothing against short people or anything like that. In fact if he was just only a tiny bit shorter that would be doable, but he wasn't lol. He was up to my shoulders and that is a no go for me. Another problem was that he lied about his height on his profile. He said he was 5'7. I am 5'5 and he came up to my shoulders, there's just no way. I have a zero tolerance when it comes to lying, so this just won't work lol.

Now there's this guy I have been talking to since New Years that I met through one of my friends. He lives in South Carolina and he's had this huge crush on me ever since and we have been talking on and off as well. When I told him that I broke things off with my SO he jumped right on the chance to be with me. He told me he wants to come up in January to see me. What's amazing is that I have friend zoned this guy for almost a year now, and he still says that he wants to come see me no matter what. Even if I have another boyfriend by that time, he still wants to see me. Like wow.

Then finally there's my ex SO. He messaged me on Skype, while he was at work (which is very rare for him to have done) about a week or two ago and we talked. He finally gave me an answer as to why he just disappeared for as long as he did. It turns out his best friend, whom he was very close to, had passed away and he didn't know how to deal with that. He wanted to run away from everything and the way he did it was he focused only on work and shut everyone out, including me.

When he told me that I just started crying. At that moment I wanted to be there and just hold him, but the other reason for my tears was anger. I hated that he chose not to confide in me about this and instead made me think that he was dumping me. I just don't understand this man anymore, yet I still care and love him deeply. When I actually get to talk with him things are great, and I could tell that he really does love me, yet he is just a major idiot about it. My birthday was last Friday and he was the very first person to wish me happy birthday. He actually waited til midnight even though he was working to tell me "Happy birthday beautiful" None of my exes have ever wished me a happy birthday post breakup before. So this was a big thing for me. It made me happier than I've been in a long time.

I still love my ex and I do still wanna try to at least meet him just once. I even thought about possibly going to grad school in his city, and mind you it's not just because of him I just really like Philly and I would really like to experience living there just for a bit. Though that idea is just in the air for now and I haven't made any decisions yet. Frankly I don't want to just yet. I just want to focus on school and work for now. I don't want any guy drama and yet I have all these guys around me who have fallen for me, and I just can't deal with this now lol. Life is all about experimentation, and if I end up choosing to experiment with my ex again then so be it.