Problems with closing the distance?

[Maximum212]

Its a bit early for me to think about this given that me and my S/O aren't even exactly dating since parents don't approve, yet I'm just wondering about some stuff..
Since I'm 15 and she's turning 15, we won't be closing the distance anytime soon obviously. Yet in preparation for when that time comes, if it comes, what would we do about...
Friends and family?
I have friends here in New York and she has friends there in Tennessee. If and when one of us moves, our previous close distance friendships will become long distance friendships with occasional visits, not to mention family as well. We have roots in the places we live now, and I'm not sure which one of us would be more willing to forfeit them. It isn't a complete forfeit since we could still communicate, yet it still is a bit of a forfeit since we wouldn't be in close distance. Honestly I'm not much of a social person, so I don't have too many friends I would really, really miss, but I do have a few. As for her, she's really social, and I know she has a lot of friends. I feel like there may be some kind of gender standpoint on this (male should move, female shouldn't be traveling).
As for family, given that we would move out of our parents' houses before even closing the distance, that wouldn't be much of a blow. However, we wouldn't be able to see family as easily as we would like.
How should we cope with things like this? I know its really early, but I just want to be prepared, in case this really does happen and the decision needs to be made.

[Romeo s Juliet]

hi
its good that you are thinking about this early. it is always good to have some goals and know what will happen in another 2-5 years.

regarding what you said about who should move is something that both if you need to talk about. it is a huge decision. when we love someone deeply we always want to be with them, think of a life with them, living together with them. and like you said once you live close distance, once you close the distance, your parents whom you lives with for all your life, and your childhood friends become long distance. it is a inevitable. it is an aspect that people dont think about too often. but its true. and it is hard, and living away from everyone you know, because you want a life with your partner is a huge deal. that is why u should never move to where your partner is from just because of him/her.
you should have a reason for yourself to move out there to take a risk and build a life together with her.

and about who is moving to whom, there is no gender standpoint. i think both partners should be willing to move. I am female and i moved to be with my bf leaving my family and friends. its hard, because automatically my family became long distant.
but i didnt move here just for him. he was of course a hugeeee reason, but i also wanted a change from where i lived and i wanted to study here, i made all plans before leaving my hometown. and in the future we both will be moving back again to my hometown.

so it takes 2 always. not every situation is like mine but yes what i wanted to say in a nutshell is, one should move, and that is for the best of the relationship. and moving is not done entirely because ur partner is there, it is because you want to move too, and study/work and build a life for ur self. yes you both are a couple. but you are a individual apart from your relationship. moving solely because of your partner to live in a foreign place can be daunting, if you dont have a prepare plan to study/work there.

[annieszabo]

Hello.

I agree with R S J that it is good to think of it early. I should have talked about it sooner with my SO. I will tell you my current situation with my SO and trying to plan to close the distance and hope it might help you in the long run.

You see. I have been looking into going into a Baking and pastry major. and seeing as my SO lives in the states and myself in Canada. And both of us wanting to stay somewhat close to our family. I have been wanting to try to get into a Culinary school in the states. So that we can comprimise by being somewhat half we between both of our families. But still this is hard because ohio doesnt have many culinary insitutes. But luckily my SO has been such an amazing and understanding person when it comes to this because she has been looking into schools all over the states with me as well as houses. The fact that shes willing to move a little further from her family and friends just so we can be togeter and study. Is comforting to me and makes me feel even more loved. But, back to what you wanted to know. Every situation has its ups and downs and comprimises. You both would have to find something that would work for both of you.