A New Plan of Action.

[Svalla]

My love and I have been in a long-distance relationship for three years now.

The distance between us isn't terribly great anymore - it's only a four hour drive to visit him. The only problem is the border in between us. I'm currently living in Canada, and my sweetheart is just south of me in ND, USA. We've been working hard to find a way to close the distance between us. There have been many lengthy discussions on who should move where, what visas to look into, how much everything is going to cost, and so on. We finally decided that I would move to the USA, since he recently got a long-term, steady job (part of our agreement was that if one of us found a good job, the other would move to be with them). However, moving to the USA is complicated. Work visas are nearly impossible to get, I'm not ready to go back to school , and we're not quite ready for marriage (we both agreed that we want to live together for at least half a year before deciding to tie the knot). Ultimately, I was beginning to lose hope of ever being able to close the distance.

That's right about when my partner suggested a new plan of action: since I am allowed to be in the USA for up to 6 months out of a year without needing a visa, I would save up all the money I can for a year (or so), then move in with him for about half a year. His new job pays well enough that he can support the both of us. After that, if all goes well, we would look at getting a fiancee visa, which would then lead to him sponsoring me into the country.

I feel like this plan of action should work, but if anyone has any advice or experience with this, I'd love the input! Have any of you had difficulty finding the right visa to move closer to your loved one?

[Schlafmütze]

My bf and I have about the same plan and pretty much because of the same reasons. I will be the one moving to him for a period of 6 months.
First we were considering me getting a master in Germany, but since I recently finished grad studies and honestly don't want to go back to school for a while; we decided it was better for me to take an intensive, 6 months german course. If we decide to get married and live in Germany, being able to communicate will be key, not only job wise. If we don't work out, knowing a 3rd language will not hurt me. Plus I enjoy learning languages.

I will be applying for a "Language course visa" and since the language course will take more than 3 months, once there and after some bureaucratic stuff, I will go to the "Ausländerbehörde" where my visa(good for 3 months) will be turned into a resident permit valid for my time there, sometimes longer.
In Germany, as a language student, you are allowed to work up to 90 days or 180 half days per year. So we will also be trying to find a part time job for me.

This won't be my first time applying for a visa and I have never gotten one denied, but for some reason, this time I feel more nervous/anxious about the whole thing.

Good luck to you and your partner!!

[Zephii]

This seems like a fairly solid plan, however I must caution you on how difficult you may find it to be unable to work for six months, especially in a new place where you may not already have your own friends. His wage might be enough to support you - but is that comfortably or with a fairly strict budget? Are you going to feel bad for wanting to spend money to keep yourself entertained? Will you have your own car or reliable public transport?
This kind of arrangement can put a lot of stress on you both and pressure on the relationship so it's good to know how you're going to combat those stresses before you move.

[Svalla]

This seems like a fairly solid plan, however I must caution you on how difficult you may find it to be unable to work for six months, especially in a new place where you may not already have your own friends. His wage might be enough to support you - but is that comfortably or with a fairly strict budget? Are you going to feel bad for wanting to spend money to keep yourself entertained? Will you have your own car or reliable public transport?
This kind of arrangement can put a lot of stress on you both and pressure on the relationship so it's good to know how you're going to combat those stresses before you move.

Definitely all good points! I've already realized that it would be very difficult being unemployed for half a year. However, my plan is to volunteer at the local Norse museum - I had tried getting a work visa through them a few months ago, and they recommended I volunteer there when I can (Volunteering will also make it easier for them to employ me later when my move becomes permanent).

I should have plenty of things to keep me entertained, both of us have a large number of friends in the city (DEFINITELY will make the move easier!). One of my friends offered to let me use his car when I needed as well, so that - along with bus routes - should help me get around all right. Our budget will be a bit tight, but my boyfriend and I both have a lot of experience with living on a tight budget, so I feel fairly confident that we will make it work.

[Zephii]

Sounds like you're all sorted

[Svalla]

Sounds like you're all sorted

I sure hope so I've got my fingers crossed!!

[digitalfever]

I would caution that you have an emergency fund with enough money to cover an expensive plane ticket home. I'm not trying to be a debbie downer I am just a firm believer in always preparing for the worst but knowing the best will happen.

[Svalla]

I would caution that you have an emergency fund with enough money to cover an expensive plane ticket home. I'm not trying to be a debbie downer I am just a firm believer in always preparing for the worst but knowing the best will happen.

Definitely a good plan! I'm already planning on having a decent sum of money in my savings for whatever-happens-after (whether that be weddings, moving back to Canada and needing money while I find work, or whatever). Having enough for an emergency trip back is definitely a good backup plan though!

[Kristin91]

That sounds like a good plan Good luck, and congratulations!

[ChibiFelicia]

I was going to point out that if you two do decide on a fiancee or marriage visa that you do have to go back to canada. Gotta think about how will you live when you go back. But from your last post it sounds like you've already thought about this : ) So it sounds good. Hope it works out

[Svalla]

So there's been an unexpected twist to our plan recently... Just to see what would happen, I applied for a job in the states. Just had the interview, and it looks like as long as my visa application and everything goes through, I have a job in the city my sweetie lives in. Holy smokes! Totally wasn't expecting this sort of opportunity to come up, and I'm super nervous, especially because of all the horror stories I've heard regarding getting US work visas. But here's hoping!! Either way, I'll know within the month

[dukes2011]

Wow sounds like fate! Good luck and I hope everything works out with the work visa Based on what you said before it also sounds like you two really think things through, so you'll find a way to make closing the distance happen.

[.:*Shaunna*:.]

That's awesome news, congratulations. Hope everything goes smoothly with the visa

[Svalla]

Well. It seems like every time a plan seems to work, something changes. I had technically gotten the job with the company I applied for, we had started on paperwork, and then everything ground to a halt. Normally they don't have enough applicants for the position, but they received several application from more-qualified-than-me people. So now it's back to the drawing board for me. Hopefully I can find another employer, but the chances of that are looking dangerously slim. *sigh*. Guess there's nothing to do but keep chugging along though! Something will work eventually

Anyone have any suggestions on what I should do from here? I have to have some form of work right now to pay off my student loan, but I'm not sure how I can do that AND look at moving South.