How to make this possible?

[stacey0811]

I have a very loving boyfriend that lives in Australia and I'm in NC, USA. We had been planning for a few months for him to come visit me for the first time in person in July while he's on a school holiday break. However the funding for that has fallen through as the costs and fees of his college education are more than expected. Because he is going to school full time he currently only works severely part time and does not make much money at all. He does get stipend government money but is saving that to start our life together with when he graduates. (for things like buying a house that will suit us all as I have 2 children, etc) I am also in school full time and only work part time as well. My bills are minimal but are at the current limit of my available income. I have no savings to speak of as I am recently divorced and have only been able to recently get back on my feet after being in a homeless shelter with my 2 kids.

I am really becoming disheartened by the information I keep coming across. I've researched about visas and all that stuff the best I can and have found that a visa for me to move (which I would like to do when I graduate in a year) to Australia will cost around 3 grand. How are we ever going to be able to afford this if we can't even afford a simple plane ticket for him to come visit? I feel like it's hopeless and I don't know what to do. I don't know how to get any more funding or do this any cheaper. The job market is terrible and I have been searching for a new full time job for months now. We are both working so hard to make this happen and we love each other so much but I feel like we will never be able to be together simply because we can't afford it. It is breaking my heart to think that life can be this cruel. To deny love based only on circumstances and not because it is judged as undeserving. How does anyone else ever make this happen? I know we can't be the first ever to want to do this. How can we turn this around?

[Tooki]

His university costs shouldn't matter as they go to a deferred payment account, unless I'm missing something here.Sadly the cheapest spouse visa in Australia is indeed around $3000. You just have to get the money somehow.

How do you turn it around? Get money somehow. Can either of your parents assist you financially? Can your SO work full time during his break and put his earnings elsewhere? Perhaps you should just focus on coming to Australia and not looking to save for a house, because housing prices in Australia are astronomically inflated.

The situation is undeserving but that's life for you. Sadly Australia is an expensive place and you have baggage preventing you from making a move easier.

[stacey0811]

Unfortunately he is not attending a 4 year uni that would do such deferred payments. He is attending a school that requires payment be made with each course enrollment unless he were to take out loans to pay the balance. We aren't willing to have him take on unnecessary loans as I believe that's just another way to make things more difficult down the road. Also, our parents are not able to help either. Both of my parents are deceased or in hospice care. And his parents are having financial troubles of their own and that's why he's having to pay for his own education which was unexpected.

The idea of him working full time during breaks is a decent one which I will talk with him about but the money brought in by that will be minimal and only a drop in the bucket compared to what we will need. I am ok with putting off any visits and just focusing on the move itself and of course he is willing to use his savings to help me get there but I would really like to get there without using that as much as possible. One, so we can have a better start. Two, so I can stand on my own with his family and not seem like I'm only using him as a way to get there.... Eh, who am I kidding? I don't care how I get there, I just want to be with him!

I am willing to do whatever it takes but I really need some ideas and advice on how other people are making this happen. America is in an economical slump now, surely we are not the only ones short on funds that this is happening to. There has to still be a way to make this happen. I refuse to give up.

[Tooki]

Oh, is he attending a private university then?

The situations sucks, eh? The problem is that you have children. If you didn't have children, you could come on a Working Holiday Visa (MUCH cheaper to get), get a random crappy job in Australia and save up for the spousal visa that way.

I'm planning on bringing my GF to Australia from Europe on a similar visa next year. Our path is much easier though because she doesn't have children. Unless you can scrap up a few thousand dollars, you can't move over. The process of bringing a spouse into Australia doesn't seem particularly hard but it is costly.

[stacey0811]

well the children will not be moving immediately with me. we had originally planned for them to remain here with their dad for a year while I get settled and situated for them in Australia. Is there additional requirements to the working holiday visa? If I remember correctly when I looked into that there were age restrictions and you had to have either a bachelors degree or a profession that was in need right? When I graduate in a year I'll only have my Associates degree and it'll be in Graphic Design. I'll be 30 by then as well so I'm not sure if that visa would even be possible.

[Tooki]

I'm unsure about if you can get the visa if you have children, but you decide not to bring them with you.

There is an age restriction of 30. I don't know more about that sorry. Is your SO older then too?

[stacey0811]

lol no he is not. This is all just so confusing. I've never been much farther than to the next state over and here I am trying to figure out how to move across the world. I wish these things could just be written out in easy to understand terms and in easy to find places.

[Dezface]

Hello, I am on a working holiday in Oz right now. Regarding this visa: you CAN get it if you are 30, you can not have turned 31 at the time of application. If you have kids that will not be coming with you, you can apply but you have to do it on paper and not online. The working holiday does seem like your best bet.

Can I ask if the children's father is aware of your plans?


Edit: also you do not need a degree or any specific knowledge to get this visa. It is intended for tourist use.

[Tooki]

Cheers Dez.

You definitely don't need a degree to get a WHV.

[lucybelle]

I just want to say, that as much as you want to be with your SO, right now your priority should be your two kids. You just got out of a homeless shelter. Get on your own two feet! You shouldn't even be considering visas or international plane tickets right now. You should be focused on paying rent, providing for your kids, and getting a nice little savings account started. I really think that should be your focus for now.

[stacey0811]

that's actually really good news. And yes the kids dad know what the deal is. we are still on very good terms so no issues there. I don't turn 30 till august of this year and I will be graduated by april of next year. How does it work being on a WHV? do you just apply, get it and then travel there and start applying for jobs? How expensive was yours to obtain? I'm thinking I might be able to do that before I even graduate if it's more affordable.

[Tooki]

Usually you apply online (which is dirt easy) but it might be trickier as you would need to apply at an Australian representation due to your child situation.

Once you get the visa, you can just fly to and enter Australia. You can then apply for jobs from there. Does your SO live in Sydney? If not, it will be a lot harder to find a job as the job market is bleak outside of the major cities.

You'll need travel insurance (essential as an American, you aren't eligible for any reciprocal health benefits) and proof of funds in your account. My GF knows people who have come to Australia with this visa and have not been asked to show the proof of funds but I'm not recommending for you to risk it.

[stacey0811]

I just want to say, that as much as you want to be with your SO, right now your priority should be your two kids. You just got out of a homeless shelter. Get on your own two feet! You shouldn't even be considering visas or international plane tickets right now. You should be focused on paying rent, providing for your kids, and getting a nice little savings account started. I really think that should be your focus for now.

While I appreciate your concern, you don't know the specifics of my situation and your advice about something that I didn't ask for is waaay off topic. I didn't divulge information about my situation in that regard because it is no one's business but my own and making assumptions about my priorities and my family situation is not answering the question that I posted to this board.

[stacey0811]

Usually you apply online (which is dirt easy) but it might be trickier as you would need to apply at an Australian representation due to your child situation.

Once you get the visa, you can just fly to and enter Australia. You can then apply for jobs from there. Does your SO live in Sydney? If not, it will be a lot harder to find a job as the job market is bleak outside of the major cities.

You'll need travel insurance (essential as an American, you aren't eligible for any reciprocal health benefits) and proof of funds in your account. My GF knows people who have come to Australia with this visa and have not been asked to show the proof of funds but I'm not recommending for you to risk it.

How much funds do you need to show proof of? And yes he does live in Sydney. I'm not worried about health insurance, I have none to speak of here either so I'm screwed if something should happen to me no matter where I go lol.

[kteire]

While I appreciate your concern, you don't know the specifics of my situation and your advice about something that I didn't ask for is waaay off topic. I didn't divulge information about my situation in that regard because it is no one's business but my own and making assumptions about my priorities and my family situation is not answering the question that I posted to this board.

I have to say that I agree with lucybelle, and she's only basing her answer on the information you've given, not speculating.

To answer your thread question of how to make this possible? Give it a while of focusing on making a living for yourself, because there won't be a quick fix. You've come from a very difficult situation and I'm happy to hear that things are turning around, but it might be just that you have to decide it's not financially feasible without huge implications at this point in time, and try to set long-term goals that will be better for you and your family.