Afraid to fly..

[differentcountries]

This is a problem I will have someday, if we progress that far. I am actually a fairly experienced flyer, having made many domestic flights over the years, mainly to and from Virginia (my home state), and Las Vegas, relatively short flights with one layover each way. My problem is my ears! No matter how much gum I chew, how much I eat, or how much I yawn, I always have pain in my ears. It helps if I take a 12-hour pain relief capsule, such as Alleve, but this is short trips I'm talking about, only a few hours, and I still have trouble with my ears. The idea of facing a 19 or more hour flight, knowing the pain I will be in, scares me. Also, my vision isn't that good anymore, and I have trouble reading those airport Flight monitors, so I am afraid of getting lost at a huge International Airport in a foreign country, thousands of miles from the US, especially if I am traveling alone, as I usually do.

I have a challenge with my ears as well. I use special flying air plugs I bought at the airport.

[Hollandia]

I am an experienced traveler and my first time in Heathrow was atrocious!! My second time was easier but still. I can't imagine Heahtrow being a changeover for someone new and scared of flying. Not everyone is made out of the same material and are emotionally able to brave things. I have offered to meet him in NY but even that is quite expensive from Texas.. 2 trips there and back equals about 800 dollars!!

I still don't like Heathrow, it is a pain in the arse, but it is well marked and tons of staff around to help if needed. I did it first time, was terrified, but it turned out fine. It reminds me very much of mall. You get off the plane and follow the crowd and signs. I had a much worse time in a smaller airport in Rotterdam where they did not offer as many signs or help and it was more assumed you were a local that knew your way around. I was able to call my SO's mom and have her walk me through it because I was clueless in it. I avoid the small more local airports for this reason.

[Hollandia]

I am a die hard romantic so I am the type that will move mountains for love and I did. I flew for my first time EVER to Finland and I was scared. It wasn't for him though, my grist Finnish boyfriend. Anyway, if you have a fear or phobia, I know some people that cannot move they are so scared. I am wondering if he is like that? He has said he cant physically get on a plane.. Anyway, I feel like I am making excuses for him when I am only trying to be understanding like you should be for a partner. Still though I cant help but being angry a little since I see all of these couples flying back and forth to see each other.

I am an experienced traveler by now so I know all of these things. I still get nervous when I get on the plane heading across that Atlantic Ocean. I have told him all of these things already. It is just him that has to figure out a way to make it work. I dont think giving him deadlines will work either and it sure doesnt make me fall out of love with him. Love takes time to get over so I guess things are the way they are, though undesirable until he either flies or I fall out of love right?

It is really hard to say because I do feel he should at least be willing to try. Has he ever flown anywhere before? Does he have ability to meet you in a Paris airport via train and then the two of you could fly together to your final destination?

The other thing that troubles me is if he won't EVER fly, what happens after you are married with kids together? Will he never fly to visit with your family and friends in USA? Most of my family and friends will never make it over here to Netherlands, and I can't expect them too. I guess what I am saying is even after you close the distance many LDRs still need to spend some time in airplanes to keep in contact with the partner that moved's family and close friends. It is only fair, that you cannot be expected to move to another country and not look back, or face having to make the trips alone all the time. At some point those trips would possibly involve you and your kids flying alone to meet their family in the USA. This is something I would think about bringing up to your SO.

[TexastoFinland]

I don't know, my guy and his friends are all pretty well traveled, at least within Europe. He's been everywhere, from when he was a kid, but had never left Europe (unless you count Russia) until he came here the first time. I agree with different countries, maybe a quick flight to Rovaniemi up north, or even Stockholm or St. Petersburg, they're all only about an hour long. I can definitely understand his fears, that would be a helluva first flight! If he handles a quick flight OK, then he could try something a little more challenging, like London, or Italy, or wherever he can get a really cheap ticket. He's just gotta take that first step

Girl! I have been trying to get him to go on a plane ANYWHERE since 2012! If it were THAT easy.. well let's just say there wouldn't be this post!

[differentcountries]

Well, we didn't know that. Does he think that not flying is a problem for him? Or does he more like brush it off... Is any major transportation a challenge, or just flying?