Hey Guys,
I'm relatively new here and thought I would come here for LDR advise rather than posting this elsewhere. A little back ground, I am in an LDR of about 1800 miles and have been for the duration of our relationship, about 7 months. Things have been going pretty well, they got harder after the honeymoon phase was over and we realized we would have to work through this LDR thing but we have and it has been great. We're even blessed enough financially to see each other once a month. I have never been a LDR person before but I am really enjoying this and care a lot about her. She is still in school, and I have already graduated. I know this is a problem for some people but I couldn't find any posts about my specific problem. Which i suppose is that she is "very busy". She is in her last year of undergraduate schooling and I know how time consuming and stressful that can be especially around finals week which is coming up. But that really isn't the problem. The problem is that she tells me she is too busy to really spend any time with me. We skyped last month on our 6 months and haven't had a date since then so for almost a month. We hardly talk on the phone, and only send each other a few times a day no matter how I try to engage with her. I asked her and she says it is soly because end of semester is approaching and she is so busy with her schoolwork. That I can understand being busy doesn't bother me, having school work doesn't bother me and I want to be as little of a stress to her as possible. But this week for instance I texted her asking if she would have time for a skype date at all this week. To which she responded she would be too busy all week with schoolwork and may have time to talk for a bit but no date. The same day she told me she didn't have time she went out with friends and spent the evening drinking. She also later told me that she had just invited a friend to come in from out of town and they would be spending the rest of the week together. She also planned a christmas party and alrerady has plans to go out the whole weekend with her friend. Now alone these things don't bother me but it doesn't seem like shes so busy with school work that she has no free time and this has been going on for about four and a half weeks now, where she uses school work as an excuse but has time to gout and do plenty of other things. I want to "save" our LDR even though were not fighting and she shows no concern of our relationship being in danger, but I have talked to her about our lack of spending time together and it now has become the norm no matter how much i stress that it bothers me. Any ideas on how to i don't know, respark our relationship? Because right now it feels like I have a girlfriend who doesn't want to spend any time with me or even talk to me :/ I did get her to have a date with me yesterday only after sending her surprise flowers and basically begging through text message but it felt like more of a "pity" date since I felt like I basically had to beg for it. Thanks for your help, I really appreciate it.
I'm relatively new here and thought I would come here for LDR advise rather than posting this elsewhere. A little back ground, I am in an LDR of about 1800 miles and have been for the duration of our relationship, about 7 months. Things have been going pretty well, they got harder after the honeymoon phase was over and we realized we would have to work through this LDR thing but we have and it has been great. We're even blessed enough financially to see each other once a month. I have never been a LDR person before but I am really enjoying this and care a lot about her. She is still in school, and I have already graduated. I know this is a problem for some people but I couldn't find any posts about my specific problem. Which i suppose is that she is "very busy". She is in her last year of undergraduate schooling and I know how time consuming and stressful that can be especially around finals week which is coming up. But that really isn't the problem. The problem is that she tells me she is too busy to really spend any time with me. We skyped last month on our 6 months and haven't had a date since then so for almost a month. We hardly talk on the phone, and only send each other a few times a day no matter how I try to engage with her. I asked her and she says it is soly because end of semester is approaching and she is so busy with her schoolwork. That I can understand being busy doesn't bother me, having school work doesn't bother me and I want to be as little of a stress to her as possible. But this week for instance I texted her asking if she would have time for a skype date at all this week. To which she responded she would be too busy all week with schoolwork and may have time to talk for a bit but no date. The same day she told me she didn't have time she went out with friends and spent the evening drinking. She also later told me that she had just invited a friend to come in from out of town and they would be spending the rest of the week together. She also planned a christmas party and alrerady has plans to go out the whole weekend with her friend. Now alone these things don't bother me but it doesn't seem like shes so busy with school work that she has no free time and this has been going on for about four and a half weeks now, where she uses school work as an excuse but has time to gout and do plenty of other things. I want to "save" our LDR even though were not fighting and she shows no concern of our relationship being in danger, but I have talked to her about our lack of spending time together and it now has become the norm no matter how much i stress that it bothers me. Any ideas on how to i don't know, respark our relationship? Because right now it feels like I have a girlfriend who doesn't want to spend any time with me or even talk to me :/ I did get her to have a date with me yesterday only after sending her surprise flowers and basically begging through text message but it felt like more of a "pity" date since I felt like I basically had to beg for it. Thanks for your help, I really appreciate it.
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