Would you wait for your SO?

[sam]

I'll wait forever (not too convenient ;D) if I had to, to be with Elina. I've got something so special and amazing.. I'd be an idiot to let it pass. She's got my heart and if she needed time/space, so be it.
I'd always wait for her, and be here when she's ready

I've already had to wait while she was with someone else (I guess she didnt know how I felt at that point) and it killed me, so I think I can deal with any more waiting that may have to occur

[Liz]

I'm leaving anyways once I graduate, so I might as well move to where he is and find out if we are right for each other. I'd rather do it sooner then later because, if we aren't right for each other, I have the rest of my life to get over him, and if we do belong together, I have the rest of my life to spend with him.

And plus, he gave me my time when I needed space, I can't be selfish to him.... He's put up with literal hell to be with me (either from me, or from others) so I can at least do this for him. And what's the point? Even if i didnt wait, i wouldn't be over him because I never found out if we were right for each other...

[Insanity]

Is he "waiting for you"? If he is dating other people or in another relationship, or even actively looking for one, I don't think you bother waiting. If he just needs some time alone to focus and sort out his life without having to worry about maintaining a serious relationship, then I think you should wait. If after spending time alone, he is still in love with you, I think that's a sign of how strong your relationship can be - leaving each other just doesn't work. However, I wouldn't move to be with him until he was ready to be back in a serious relationship. I hope things work out for you!

That's a good point, I'd only wait for my guy if he was waiting for me and also compromising too. I'm not going to be a doormat.

[redbellepepper]

yes i would wait. the love that I share with Mark, isn't something you just give up. Its a once in a lifetime thing. If you feel like he is the one for you, this is will just be a silly little speed bump on the road of forever.

i totally agree!

[elina]

I'm with Sam on this one ;> I sooooooo would wait for him.. for as long as I needed if he wasn't ready. I love him way too much to let him go.. and I wouldn't want to be with anyone else. He makes me feel so good and happy and loved and beautiful.. I love him, he's so perfect for me and I suuure would be a fool to let him go :> ♥

[churchgrim]

I think I would wait for him, but only if he asked me to. I wouldn't want to break up and wait until we could be CDR to realize our love isn't as strong anymore. If he needed time and space, he's entitled, and although I would probably be miserable there is really nothing I would be able to do about it but I think I would ask if he wanted me to wait, because if he "wasn't sure" than I don't think I'd be able to be rejected twice..

This. If he needed space I'd respect it, but I'd reconsider his feelings for me. I understand the strain people go through, not just in LDRs, but in general, too, but if someone wants space from you when you're supposed to be there for them and be their support, I'd feel rejected.

[ioanna]

i would...because, in a way, i am...for a quick background, we were CD for 4 years, and have been LD for about 10 months now... he is a very reserved and independent person.. whenever something went wrong in his life he took time for himself to sort it out.. its his way of dealing with things... i have come to terms with it, but it took me sometime... now being LD its a lot harder, because i cant rely on his body language to tell what hes going through, and i can't be there for him to comfort him the only way i do, that is through tender contact... if i just send him an email with cuddles, he would feel worse because hed miss me like crazy on top of what hes going through, i would just be turning a knife in his wounds... i know it sounds weird but it is like that with us... so far things havent been going very well for him since he's left. we've tried adjusting to different means of communication, and different rhythms... and kind of found something that works for us... we just try and make the best of the time we do get to spend together...
some of my friends think im crazy to wait for him knowing we wont be together before 2014 (worst case scenario).. i will be 30 by then and him 33... but i know hes waiting for me too... and we both want to start a family together... if there is a way for us to be together sooner, i dont think we'd think twice about it...

[Tanja]

I would wait as long as I needed to IF it was because of circumctances that were stopping us from being together. I've alredy waited long enough so if Andy would just say he needed space and wanted me to wait for him for months/years I don't think I would be willing to do that. But then again I know he wouldn't ask that because he wants to be with me a.s.a.p.
As for me, I wouldn't ask him to wait for me if I wasn't sure about my feelings and needed time/space to think about things unless it was only for a few days or so.

I don't think it's fair to keep the other person dangling and waiting and hoping while the other one thinks about what they want and possibly then decided to break it up, it would be too cruel.

[folclor]

Yeah, that is a good point that if he's not waiting you shouldn't. I know with what I talked to Alex about he just wouldn't be ready for any relationship. So he's just scared that he won't be ready in general but if he's not and feels like I'm the right girl for him then he wants to get together when he is ready. Considering we're just 20 and 21 I don't mind. I'm not big into the dating scene and I really wouldn't want to find someone else if I knew he was waiting for me.

[Bluestars]

I guess it depends on the circumstances, but if my SO asked me to do that, then I would be terribly hurt and just waiting for him would be too painful for me. I do not think it would be fair to me to put my life on hold, so I would probably force myself to move on with my life. I also have somewhat of an abandonment issue that has resulted from my parents' divorce, so that would probably make it very hard for me to forgive him, honestly.

But who knows, circumstances might arise that could bring you together again.

[polkapiggy]

I would wait. Of course, I'm not going to wait around for like 20 years, but I would wait for him to adjust and have some time on his own if he decided that he needed that. It's not going to happen anyway though, Alex gets down in the dumps if he misses just one day of talking to me :3

[LadyMarchHare]

I was actually thinking about this yesterday.

The last full conversation my SO and I had, he was telling me he was conflicted because his entire life was built around feeding off his anger towards others, regret for his mistakes, and pain. He's had a rough life so it became fuel for the one thing that started my attraction to him--his writing. He's been going through a writer's block lately and he realized it was because he's changing as a person. He's no longer the angry, bitter man he was because now he isn't alone and he has someone who's made him happy, but his writing is suffering for it. When he told me this I thought he was going to ask that we part ways because he did not want to lose an integral part of himself (the anger/hurt) and chart new waters. He didn't, but I still feel terrible that I am causing such a great internal conflict.

I was thinking about it while I was showering yesterday, about if he had left me to keep his method of writing since he does want to write a book some day. The question that came to me was, would I be alright with this, and if he came back, would I take him back? Honestly, I would feel hurt if his writing, though wonderful, was put above me and his happiness. Chances are I'd feel bitter, probably would become depressed, but I wouldn't want him out of my life and I would support him. Would I take him back? Yes. While in some circumstances (this fictional one among them) it seems a right stupid thing to do, you kinda have to go with the old "I love them" excuse, because it's true. These relationships are hard and can change people for better or worse and it's sometimes very overwhelming and you have to step back and assess just what the hell happened and do you want it to keep happening.

I would wait for him. I've waited my entire life for someone who understood my damage and glued the salvageable pieces back together again with just three words, I can wait a bit more if they need to figure out just where they end and 'we' begin.