Question about sex/fidelity and compromise

[MeganK]

Thats not right, he must not be very serious about u.
if women can go without sex and survive, so can a man.
dont let him tell u he cant handle going without sex thats just stupid.
if he cares about u enough he would not feel the need to have sex with some
random woman, even if he is honest about being unfaithful, ur still gonna get hurt no matter
if he tells u to ur face to a lie. hes being unfaithful and i see it as hes not as serious about the relationship are u are.

[Dauntedpoet]

This tells me you shouldn't do it.
There's nothing wrong with saying "don't have sex for the next eight months". There's nothing wrong with being needy - or being safe. The best intentions and the best of protection can still fall through- every time he takes a partner he puts himself and you at risk, and there's always a chance however slight that one of his partners will fall pregnant.
If you're not getting anything from it except possibly preventing him leaving or cheating, then he's not worth it. (imo)

I agree with Zeph, your comments lead me to believe you may not be built for an open relationship. Some people are, some aren't. I am not built for it.
If you're not completely comfortable with the idea, and you decide to 'go along with it' to keep him, your relationship won't survive anyways.

[Bethypoo]

I agree with some of the other posters here so I will keep it short.

If you need monogamy then he needs to understand and respect that. It isn't just about him. You too have needs... but if you are willing to stick with it then, even though it is hard, I don't see why he cant.

There is still phone sex and other ways to stay intimate, but if sex is his excuse then maybe he really just isn't worth it. If he wanted to be with you and only you he would do what he had to to work though it. I personally don't believe in open relationships because I feel like it can lead to trust issues which I feel you have now anyway due to his comments.

As you have read, it works for some, but you need to decide what you want. And don't compromise what you want/need for a man. It isn't worth it.

[lucybelle]

There is still phone sex and other ways to stay intimate, but if sex is his excuse then maybe he really just isn't worth it. If he wanted to be with you and only you he would do what he had to to work though it. I personally don't believe in open relationships because I feel like it can lead to trust issues which I feel you have now anyway due to his comments.

I don't too much like this statement because that is the whole reason of an open relationship. For the sex. My SO and I were in an open relationship for the sex. Because we wanted to have sex. That's the only reason we did it. We didn't do it for kicks and giggles, it was purely physical relationships.

This made me very curious and I went to look Dan Savage up. In this video he addresses open relationships in an LDR.

After watching the video I guess my open relationship is exactly what he described. We just had an open space where we didn't ask about it. Again, it worked well for us