So the last time I posted here it was to say my s/o had called it quits. He ended things last Monday afternoon.
Monday night I sent him a text and he replied back even though he said he was done. We continued texting back and forth before he called me. We talked for an hour about what went down, with me continuously stressing how extreme everything was getting. He was set in his ways and said something like what's done is done. I asked him if he was absolutely sure, because he has a habit of saying things when he's upset that he later regrets. He say that I didn't have to worry about him changing his mind this time and he hung up the phone.
I texted him once more, he replied back, I texted him again. Then he started joking around about sending each other's things back and I couldn't tell if he was really happy/laughing about everything or if he was just trying to mask his real feelings. I told him that I couldn't laugh and be happy because this wasn't what I wanted. He then texted to ask what do you do when you're sick and tired of going through the same thing? I told him you find out what it is you're sick and tired of and find a resolution. He replied with and if that doesn't work? I told him that you do all you can to make it work, which means finding a resolution, but also understanding why it keeps coming up and dealing with that as well. If you don't do all you can, you're running away. He then asked what didn't I do? I told him that he never tried to understand why communication means so much to me and why it's something I continue bringing up. I brought it to his attention the last time we argued about communication and he blew it off. He called and then asked me why I felt he blew it off. I told him and we spent 40 minutes on the phone at like 3-4am discussing the issue. He didn't know what to say, but ended the conversation asking if the mess that had been made was cleaned up. He said he needed some time to soak it all in.
We texted Tuesday night and he said he didn't know what he wanted to happen because he was tired of going through arguments about communication. He suggested we talk to an older couple about the issues we've been having. I texted him Wednesday morning to see if he still wanted to have the conversation and he didn't answer the question, but instead asked if I was going to get help for the issues I have. I told him I would and asked him the same. He replied with yes. This was Wednesday morning. Yesterday was the first time we talked since then and the conversation we had never went back to what we last discussed. However, he initiated the contact. Is the fact that he didn't mention it his way of saying he's ready to move forward? Does he still think we need to talk to someone in order to repair things? Or does he not even think this relationship is worth repairing? I don't know how to move the conversation in a way that answers those questions. I'm just trying to make sense of where things stand. When someone says they're done, they really are. They don't continue calling and texting and making suggestions on how to fix things. I apologize for the long post.
Monday night I sent him a text and he replied back even though he said he was done. We continued texting back and forth before he called me. We talked for an hour about what went down, with me continuously stressing how extreme everything was getting. He was set in his ways and said something like what's done is done. I asked him if he was absolutely sure, because he has a habit of saying things when he's upset that he later regrets. He say that I didn't have to worry about him changing his mind this time and he hung up the phone.
I texted him once more, he replied back, I texted him again. Then he started joking around about sending each other's things back and I couldn't tell if he was really happy/laughing about everything or if he was just trying to mask his real feelings. I told him that I couldn't laugh and be happy because this wasn't what I wanted. He then texted to ask what do you do when you're sick and tired of going through the same thing? I told him you find out what it is you're sick and tired of and find a resolution. He replied with and if that doesn't work? I told him that you do all you can to make it work, which means finding a resolution, but also understanding why it keeps coming up and dealing with that as well. If you don't do all you can, you're running away. He then asked what didn't I do? I told him that he never tried to understand why communication means so much to me and why it's something I continue bringing up. I brought it to his attention the last time we argued about communication and he blew it off. He called and then asked me why I felt he blew it off. I told him and we spent 40 minutes on the phone at like 3-4am discussing the issue. He didn't know what to say, but ended the conversation asking if the mess that had been made was cleaned up. He said he needed some time to soak it all in.
We texted Tuesday night and he said he didn't know what he wanted to happen because he was tired of going through arguments about communication. He suggested we talk to an older couple about the issues we've been having. I texted him Wednesday morning to see if he still wanted to have the conversation and he didn't answer the question, but instead asked if I was going to get help for the issues I have. I told him I would and asked him the same. He replied with yes. This was Wednesday morning. Yesterday was the first time we talked since then and the conversation we had never went back to what we last discussed. However, he initiated the contact. Is the fact that he didn't mention it his way of saying he's ready to move forward? Does he still think we need to talk to someone in order to repair things? Or does he not even think this relationship is worth repairing? I don't know how to move the conversation in a way that answers those questions. I'm just trying to make sense of where things stand. When someone says they're done, they really are. They don't continue calling and texting and making suggestions on how to fix things. I apologize for the long post.
At least he gave you a straight answer and like you said, now you can move on. *hugs*
dont worry, time will make u feel better
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