fighting and not talking
hello all.
so, this is my first post and regrettably it is one that i wish i didn't have to write on the subject. i came here to write because many of the other sites are so negative (people generally are very doubtful in LDRs working let alone being healthy). this post is about fighting and people needing space or being hurt.
my boyfriend and i have been talking on and off for about 4 years. we decided to date earlier this year. he loves me very much and he makes me feel so amazing considering the distance. we haven't really fought that much, sometimes we wanted space, but it was always resolved within a week or two. but this time it was our first long distance fight. he came here to visit me in texas for 3 weeks and it was amazing, i know him so well and he knows so much about me. it was happy, we had little quarrels but because we were around each other all the time we resolved them and didn't let it get the best of us and made up.
this time is different. its the first time he has been silent after a fight. its been 8 days since he made any contact with me at all. we were getting in arguments about little things and the distance has been hard on both of us since we really want to stay together for the long term. our major major fight started in the morning he always calls me when he wakes up and after work. and i was waking up on the wrong side of the bed and was snippy. he had to go and hang out with a friend and he said i love you on facetime. i didn't respond and hung up. he got really concerned and i told him maybe a break is in order and that idk, he hurt me pretty bad the night before. and i proceeded to text him saying i was talking to this friend (he assumes is an ex even though its just someone that i used to like in the past) on facebook. and that that person never made me feel like i was too weird or too different for him. he went off saying how he's so done and i hurt him and if we wanted to stay to gether than I would have never said that.
i'm crying while i write this. i asked him if if i was still coming to maryland at the end of the summer, and he said i don't know. and i said are we in a relationship and he said idk. i'm so pissed right now and i can't think and i have to go. and i was like i love you, and he just said bye.
i'm know for a fact i hurt him and between the space and not knowing whats going on and if we will resolve this and he will forgive me. my friend said he still lists himself in a relationship on facebook and still has all of our pictures up.
i'm hoping he will forgive me and we can resolve our issues. we did have a period where we didn't talk for two weeks and it was hard, but i made it through but this time we are fighting and he isn't talking. i just don't knokw how to go on without speculating so much. anyways many of my friends say it will work out and that he loves me and i should just give him space and time to heal. i'm hoping that it works.
anyone else been in a similar situation? i would like to have some guidance.
so, this is my first post and regrettably it is one that i wish i didn't have to write on the subject. i came here to write because many of the other sites are so negative (people generally are very doubtful in LDRs working let alone being healthy). this post is about fighting and people needing space or being hurt.
my boyfriend and i have been talking on and off for about 4 years. we decided to date earlier this year. he loves me very much and he makes me feel so amazing considering the distance. we haven't really fought that much, sometimes we wanted space, but it was always resolved within a week or two. but this time it was our first long distance fight. he came here to visit me in texas for 3 weeks and it was amazing, i know him so well and he knows so much about me. it was happy, we had little quarrels but because we were around each other all the time we resolved them and didn't let it get the best of us and made up.
this time is different. its the first time he has been silent after a fight. its been 8 days since he made any contact with me at all. we were getting in arguments about little things and the distance has been hard on both of us since we really want to stay together for the long term. our major major fight started in the morning he always calls me when he wakes up and after work. and i was waking up on the wrong side of the bed and was snippy. he had to go and hang out with a friend and he said i love you on facetime. i didn't respond and hung up. he got really concerned and i told him maybe a break is in order and that idk, he hurt me pretty bad the night before. and i proceeded to text him saying i was talking to this friend (he assumes is an ex even though its just someone that i used to like in the past) on facebook. and that that person never made me feel like i was too weird or too different for him. he went off saying how he's so done and i hurt him and if we wanted to stay to gether than I would have never said that.
i'm crying while i write this. i asked him if if i was still coming to maryland at the end of the summer, and he said i don't know. and i said are we in a relationship and he said idk. i'm so pissed right now and i can't think and i have to go. and i was like i love you, and he just said bye.
i'm know for a fact i hurt him and between the space and not knowing whats going on and if we will resolve this and he will forgive me. my friend said he still lists himself in a relationship on facebook and still has all of our pictures up.
i'm hoping he will forgive me and we can resolve our issues. we did have a period where we didn't talk for two weeks and it was hard, but i made it through but this time we are fighting and he isn't talking. i just don't knokw how to go on without speculating so much. anyways many of my friends say it will work out and that he loves me and i should just give him space and time to heal. i'm hoping that it works.
anyone else been in a similar situation? i would like to have some guidance.
anyways thanks for your support. i've been talking to a close friend who knows my bf and says that i should relax and give him space and he'll come around, i just maybe am very scared of being abandoned and tend to speculate and create scenarios that are self-defeating. i guess thats why i need to be forgiving of myself... i know he loves me. i just need to... maybe take this space as an opportunity to work on how to cope with my symptoms and start believing in myself more and that i deserve his love as he has told me so many times.
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