One of those days, advice please.

[Kiyama]

I don't know what's wrong with me. Only three weeks to go until I see my SO. We are four weeks down from when we last saw each other and right today I feel so depressed about everything I haven't since... I don't know. I didn't even feel like that when I left to go back to Germany a few weeks back. It's my birthday on Saturday and I'm getting together with friends and family all weekend so I have every reason to be cheerful.
But here I sit and dwell on how much I miss him and wish myself to be there Now I have struggled with depression in the last couple of months but I've come out of it. Now I'm afraid it's coming back and that's the least I want because the last weeks were great and there is a whole great summer ahead of me.
Any words of encouragement and advice what I can do to cheer myself up?

[Haley53]

Is it possible that you're feeling the burden of missing him heavier because of the depression you've experienced over the past couple months? Currently, my SO is really, really missing me to pieces, to the point he's getting insanely impatient and depressed over it, and we only have 18 days until we see one another. However, whereas my mind is at "only 18 days! ", his is at feeling like they're trudging by and like they're within reach but still so far away. Could it be possible you're experiencing something similar? A depression that's triggered by the somewhat tantalising 3-week mark?

[rawrimolivia]

I tend to feel that a lot when the time comes that you're going to be seeing each other again just because it seems like the time couldn't move any slower. You just have to remind yourself that you have an amazing SO and that the time will eventually be there and you'll be in each other's arms again. Time will eventually move for you. Do some crafts. I did that when I was missing my fiance. I got a really big poster board and printed photos of us and glued them down, then I wrote our favorite LDR quotes around it and gave it to him. Just remember that we're all going through the same thing, you'll be okay <3

[inez]

Whenever I'm really missing my SO, I try to make/do something nice for him. Once he went on vacation with his best friends meaning no contact- I'm usually spoiled with several texts throughout the day and at the very least a 5 minute nightly phone call. All I could feel were negative emotions. I was jealous of his friends, I was anxious for some contact, I was angry that he wouldn't find a way to call me. It was so difficult dealing with those things alone, especially when they felt unfair to express, that I had to stop myself from sending him a text ending it multiple times.

To counteract this pitfall of horrible feelings, I decided to paint a picture for him. Instead of focusing on his absence, I focused on the movements of my hands and the details in the subject. Not only did the activity relax me, it gave me something to be excited about giving to him. The painting is now framed and hanging next to his computer.

If you have a craft, use it to make something nice to give to him when you're together: music, art, writing... crocheting! Anything. If you don't have one, learn one. Just a suggestion of something that has helped me in the past. Whatever it is, make it positive.

[haribo0603]

It's quite natural you have struggled with depression and you have missed your SO. I understand your feelings and perhaps you need lots of energy to escape from such depression. I advise to take lots of pictures of your birthday party and send them to you SO. Many things you meet in your life will be good conversation topics with you SO. Have a good time with your family and then share your good experiences with your SO.

[Kiyama]

Thanks for your kind words. I feel much better today. The people from lfad always manage to cheer me up!

Is it possible that you're feeling the burden of missing him heavier because of the depression you've experienced over the past couple months? Currently, my SO is really, really missing me to pieces, to the point he's getting insanely impatient and depressed over it, and we only have 18 days until we see one another. However, whereas my mind is at "only 18 days! ", his is at feeling like they're trudging by and like they're within reach but still so far away. Could it be possible you're experiencing something similar? A depression that's triggered by the somewhat tantalising 3-week mark?

That could be true. It's funny because my SO is all excited and is like "are you all packed?" as if I'd go there tomorrow. Reversed roles!

Quite a few of you suggested to do somerhing arty like painting or writing. I can't paint but I write. So far it doesm't seem like I've been able to focus on writing instead of following my negative thoughts but maybe I should force myself to do it to see if it works.

Thanks again

[Haley53]

Yeah, it's the same for us too.

What if you wrote a dark piece? Writing still remains my outlet, and I can't write happy. I can, and I can produce a pretty nice piece of fiction, but the raw emotion to work off of simply is not there when I feel happy, thus I end up capitalising on my depression or anger or what cycle of emotion I'm going through and write. I rarely ever share it but oftentimes feel almost purged of those emotions after. Perhaps you should follow those dark thoughts and spin them into a piece of fiction? Get it all out there on paper?

Also, I can't paint either, but I do fingerpaint. It's actually therapeutic to simply choose colours and smear them however I want over the page. Oftentimes I end up colouring the whole page, but I think the motions of dipping my fingers in paint and spreading it across the page is almost to the soul what white noise is to the ear. But I'm very physical, so when writing doesn't cut it, I tend to take things to a piece of paper, a punchbag, etc.

These are simply things I do for me though, not my SO, when I don't feel so well.