Help ! it's over and less than 3 months untill we close the distance - devastated
well we are at our 1 year mark and it is over. I was moving at the end of October - so close - I'm so sad. i didn't feel like I had any choice but to end it. The relationship was completely one sided and I was doing all the work and planning and he was not contributing anything. i have made the 3000 mile journey 6 times to see him and stayed around 12 days each time, he came to see me once for 4 days.
I am renovating my entire house so i can rent it out when i move and i am doing all the work myself. i don't make a lot of money and I have a son that is almost 18. All i ask of him was to plan on visiting me this summer for a week to help me get things together and I ask him to contribute a little financially since I am the one having to do everything so we can be together. i have been telling him for 4 months to plan a visit but he just wouldn't. Now he says he has no money and can't come see me for another 3 or 4 months, I'll be living in California with him by then. He promised me help and he promised me a visit and he is not making good on any of that.
The worst part is i ask him if this event he goes to every year was in my town tomorrow would he be at that. he said oh yes i would put that on my credit card (I'm not going into detail here because of who he is, can't explain anymore than that). the long and the short of it is the event is sort of for his job but mostly is for his fun. It is not something that would end his career if he didn't go. I'm so hurt that a party comes before me. After all i have done for him - including dropping my whole life to fly to california for 4 days because he was having a little baby fit pity party drama meltdown. he said he needed me and I made it happen. I'm not asking that much.
He says he is sorry that he did not plan better and he did not make me a priority but there is nothing he can do about it now. When i was low on money i sold old jewelry at a cash for gold place and have sold cd's and dvd's to get money to see him. i made it happen, i don't think it is asking too much for him to make it happen as well. He social life has not suffered any as i see pictures on his facebook which I have now deleted him from because it hurts too much to see it.
i guess it is what it is but i'm so sad. I am so in love with him and he says he is in love with me. I just don't see how I can stay if he admits he did not make me a priority, even though he is sorry about it now. I really would just like some support from others who understand. I would do so much to keep us together and I just can't believe it's over.
I am renovating my entire house so i can rent it out when i move and i am doing all the work myself. i don't make a lot of money and I have a son that is almost 18. All i ask of him was to plan on visiting me this summer for a week to help me get things together and I ask him to contribute a little financially since I am the one having to do everything so we can be together. i have been telling him for 4 months to plan a visit but he just wouldn't. Now he says he has no money and can't come see me for another 3 or 4 months, I'll be living in California with him by then. He promised me help and he promised me a visit and he is not making good on any of that.
The worst part is i ask him if this event he goes to every year was in my town tomorrow would he be at that. he said oh yes i would put that on my credit card (I'm not going into detail here because of who he is, can't explain anymore than that). the long and the short of it is the event is sort of for his job but mostly is for his fun. It is not something that would end his career if he didn't go. I'm so hurt that a party comes before me. After all i have done for him - including dropping my whole life to fly to california for 4 days because he was having a little baby fit pity party drama meltdown. he said he needed me and I made it happen. I'm not asking that much.
He says he is sorry that he did not plan better and he did not make me a priority but there is nothing he can do about it now. When i was low on money i sold old jewelry at a cash for gold place and have sold cd's and dvd's to get money to see him. i made it happen, i don't think it is asking too much for him to make it happen as well. He social life has not suffered any as i see pictures on his facebook which I have now deleted him from because it hurts too much to see it.
i guess it is what it is but i'm so sad. I am so in love with him and he says he is in love with me. I just don't see how I can stay if he admits he did not make me a priority, even though he is sorry about it now. I really would just like some support from others who understand. I would do so much to keep us together and I just can't believe it's over.
It's definitely not a fun feeling knowing that you're the only one putting in any effort to make things work. As LeilaniJoi mentioned, it sounds like there were some warning signs, but I think it's good you made the decision you did. Making the move first and then finding all this out would be a lot harder than dealing with it now.
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