what do you think?!?!

[biebershawty013]

my bf is 19 ,hes gunna be 20 august 24. plus i barely turn 15 june 23. do you think its weird that im dating him?!?! What do you think?!

[Haley53]

Different people are going to feel differently about this. Do I feel comfortable with a 5 year age gap at 14 and 15? Not so much, no, but perhaps that's because I can't see why someone starting college could possibly be interested in someone starting high school, not because there's not compatibility but because they're two completely different stages in life that they're rarely comparable. That said, I believe some people on LFAD have similar age gaps (at similar ages) and they make it work.

[notyourexgirlfriend]

Then there are some of us that have much bigger age gaps than that and make it work

The only advice I have to give with regard to your age gap is that you be mindful of the consent laws for your state. Also be mindful that even if you are the age of consent, don't send any photographic material to your SO as until you turn 18 (and I'm pretty sure this is for all states in the USA) it can still be classified as child pornography.

There will be different life stages between the both of you but it doesn't mean it is insurmountable.

[pretty ll vacant]

Aaliyah said it the best, "Age ain't nothin' but a numberrrr." As long as he doesn't have some weird fetish for little girls, I think you're fine. When I was 16 i had a boyfriend who was 25, I was very mature already at that age and I didn't care what people thought because I loved him. You are a very pretty girl and you have a mature look about you so I could see where he would be super attracted. But the real question here I think is, What do YOU think? If you're in love with him and you're both being straight up with each other and the age gap doesn't bother YOU, then it's all gravyyyy. The last thing you should be worried about is what other people think.

[Trepis]

Then there are some of us that have much bigger age gaps than that and make it work

The only advice I have to give with regard to your age gap is that you be mindful of the consent laws for your state. Also be mindful that even if you are the age of consent, don't send any photographic material to your SO as until you turn 18 (and I'm pretty sure this is for all states in the USA) it can still be classified as child pornography.
There will be different life stages between the both of you but it doesn't mean it is insurmountable.

This is how I feel too, ( Bolded the part that I think is critical ) don't send photo's or videos of anything sexual in nature. I would also suggest you keep in mind that you will change signifigantly in the next 5 years. The person you will be at 20 will be very different then the person you are at 15; the same goes for him, be honest about your feelings, and encourage him to do the same,

-Trepis

[Brieasaurus]

My SO and I have a 4 1/2 year age gap. Personally, I don't see anything wrong with it. When you're 80 and your SO is 85, it doesn't really make a matter, does it? :P I just wouldn't go around bragging/talking about it because some people do think it's creepy and depending on where you are, it's illegal. If anyone asks, you can just say that he's a little older and leave it at that. Trepis also makes a great point about how you'll both change (hopefully grow together) but it's something to keep in mind.

[Sora1101]

I met my SO when I was 15 and he was 20 so I know big age gaps can and do work but please be very very careful. As others have said make sure you look up the age of consent laws in both your state and his, don't send any kind of "adult" pictures or videos to your SO, and when it is time for you to meet him make sure it's in a crowded place and that you either go with a friend or your friend will know where you are in case something goes wrong.

With that said there's no point in trying to deny that it won't be difficult, you're young and starting high school, while all your friends will be going to parties, school functions, and dating a ton of guys you'll be stuck at home video chatting your SO, you won't be able to go to dances with him or double date with your friends. He won't be there to hold your hand and walk you to class or carry your books for you, and you won't get to go on fun dates to the movies or whatever. You can make it work if you truly want to, but just know that your high school life isn't what you pictured it was going to be with your SO so far away.

[happyshazam7]

When I was 16 I started dating my ex-boyfriend, who was 20 and turned 21 shortly after. We ended up staying together for five years. But one thing that made it work is that neither of us had dated a lot, we were both virgins - so it's not like he was pushing me somewhere I wasn't ready to go. We were developing about the same rate emotionally, despite our age difference. So I'd watch out for that. What you don't want is if he's in a really different place from you or influencing you to do things that you aren't ready or don't want to do. The actual age is not that important.

[Jgui]

I think everyone has their own opinion and thoughts about the age difference. But I think age is nothing but a number. Just make sure you're careful with what you talk about to your friends and family. Him being over 18 and you under, there are laws which may get him jail time if adults find out about certain things you guys do.

[digitalfever]

I'm just being honest:

I think there is something wrong with this age gap. I feel that when you have a 5 year age gap (like this one) you are going to have very different lives. You are respectively in HS and he's either out of HS and in the work force or College/University. While I think the relationships can work I do feel that dating someone that is in a different period in their life holds you back when your younger. You inevitably want to experience life with them but you can't because to be part of their life fully you have to be able to have the independence that they do. I'm also a bit weary as to what a 20 year old and a 15 year old have in common. I've been in the whole "he's a college guy" relationship and look back and think "Holy crap! Creepy!"

[Kanga]

I'm just being honest:

I think there is something wrong with this age gap. I feel that when you have a 5 year age gap (like this one) you are going to have very different lives. You are respectively in HS and he's either out of HS and in the work force or College/University. While I think the relationships can work I do feel that dating someone that is in a different period in their life holds you back when your younger. You inevitably want to experience life with them but you can't because to be part of their life fully you have to be able to have the independence that they do. I'm also a bit weary as to what a 20 year old and a 15 year old have in common. I've been in the whole "he's a college guy" relationship and look back and think "Holy crap! Creepy!"

This! I'm not saying you guys won't work, but you change a lot in 5 years from who you are now to who you will be. You'll wind up wanting different things. Not to mention with you being in high school and him in college. Your at different places in your lives. Now, if you were 20 and 25 I wouldn't see an issue.

[temporaryuser]

A 5 year age gap at barely 15, and a 5 year age gap at even 18, are 2 totally ddifferent things! You are still considered a child. if your parents got the wrong vibe about him, it would be very easy for the to get him into a lot of trouble. And if you plan on hiding it from your parents, then you could get both of you into a lot of trouble.
As others have mentioned, the two of you are in totally different places in life. maybe if you lived closer it would be easier. But you will miss out on so much in life, sitting around waiting for him. And what are the chances of you two actually meeting up any time soon? I doubt your parents would let you go visit him, and would they consider letting him visit you?
These days you just have to be SO careful. Not necessarily because of what he could do to you, but for what other people could do to him if they did not agree with him seeing you.

[happyshazam7]

if your parents got the wrong vibe about him, it would be very easy for the to get him into a lot of trouble. And if you plan on hiding it from your parents, then you could get both of you into a lot of trouble.

This is very true. It has happened many times that a parent finds out their underage child slept with their overage boyfriend/girlfriend, and the parent presses charges of statutory rape, whether it was consensual or not. You might not think your parents would do that, but there is a lot that parents will do when they are trying to protect their child.

[Zephii]

I'm not sure why you care what people think. Generally in this kind of relationship it's good to learn not to care

Seeming you asked, I'm against it. I think it's dangerous and creepy, and possibly illegal. But then, when I was 15 I was "dating" a man 25 years older than me, and I was all "oh age is just a number!" when in reality he played a lot of sick games with me and fucked up a chunk of my life. So, I have this massive bias. And thus I keep my mouth shut unless someone directly asks what I think of it.

A question I was asked frequently was "what's in it for him to date a child?" and now, I always think that. So, what's in this for your 20 year old boyfriend? Is he really immature? Did he go through a period of illness that set him back a few years in the dating world and he's not ready for an adult relationship?
I know it's tempting to answer "He loves me for who I am, and I'm way more mature than most people my age" but honestly I think all teenagers think they are way more mature than their peers.

Yes, when you're 80 and he's 85 it's not going to mean anything. But, you're not. You're in a completely different stage of your life - one where your brain chemistry isn't even fully developed yet. You're not yet the person you will eventually become.

I think if there's something special between you, you could both wait as friends until you're an adult to pursue it.

But as I'm very biased, you should disregard this opinion