Not sure where to start...
First the happy's:
Andy got a first class honours degree in maths, which I'm super excited and happy about because things were messed up for him in many ways at one point and everyone, his friends, lecturers (and me) thought he wouldn't even pass and now he got the best possible outcome as a result of LOTS of hard work and determination.
I'm so proud of him and couldn't be happier - I love you hun ♥
He's coming here in 2 weeks to spend a month with me. I can't wait.
The thing is, we've been very distant lately, I've been busy working, he's been busy studying and making money and we haven't really talked about our future that much. And this is it pretty much, he's finished Uni and now it's time to start making plans on how to get him in here for good.
Needless to say we're both quite scared because of the changes ahead of us.
1)We've found out a few days ago that if he moves here before turning 30 and gets citizenship he could be ordered to join the army service for 6 months or do a civil service which would last 13 months... that would pretty much fuck up getting a job in here.
2)We've found out he can't get citizenship before he speaks the language - surprisingly Finnish is the most difficult European language to learn so that would take months, maybe years to learn.
3)We've found out he can't get an insurance, any kind of financial aid or a social security number until he is a Finnish citizen.
4)If he gets into a Uni in here to do a master's degree he will not get permanent residency and will be treated as a temporary resident ► no social security, insurance or financial aid.
It feels like there's so much obstacles and no matter which way we try to go something always comes up. Those 4 things pretty much link together and it's like a circle we can't get out of.
It's really quite depressing and I'm starting to have serious doubts whether we can make this work or not. I feel terribly guilty that he's the one having to go through all these life changing things while I just sit here and wait for him to come to me.
I wish I could do more, be more. I'm scared I'm not enough and not worth all this trouble. I'm scared there's gonna be so much more waiting ahead of us when I was prepared to have him here first this summer, then next year but now God knows when it will happen.
I'm scared that almost 3 years of waiting turns out to have been for nothing.
First the happy's:
Andy got a first class honours degree in maths, which I'm super excited and happy about because things were messed up for him in many ways at one point and everyone, his friends, lecturers (and me) thought he wouldn't even pass and now he got the best possible outcome as a result of LOTS of hard work and determination.
I'm so proud of him and couldn't be happier - I love you hun ♥
He's coming here in 2 weeks to spend a month with me. I can't wait.
The thing is, we've been very distant lately, I've been busy working, he's been busy studying and making money and we haven't really talked about our future that much. And this is it pretty much, he's finished Uni and now it's time to start making plans on how to get him in here for good.
Needless to say we're both quite scared because of the changes ahead of us.
1)We've found out a few days ago that if he moves here before turning 30 and gets citizenship he could be ordered to join the army service for 6 months or do a civil service which would last 13 months... that would pretty much fuck up getting a job in here.
2)We've found out he can't get citizenship before he speaks the language - surprisingly Finnish is the most difficult European language to learn so that would take months, maybe years to learn.
3)We've found out he can't get an insurance, any kind of financial aid or a social security number until he is a Finnish citizen.
4)If he gets into a Uni in here to do a master's degree he will not get permanent residency and will be treated as a temporary resident ► no social security, insurance or financial aid.
It feels like there's so much obstacles and no matter which way we try to go something always comes up. Those 4 things pretty much link together and it's like a circle we can't get out of.
It's really quite depressing and I'm starting to have serious doubts whether we can make this work or not. I feel terribly guilty that he's the one having to go through all these life changing things while I just sit here and wait for him to come to me.
I wish I could do more, be more. I'm scared I'm not enough and not worth all this trouble. I'm scared there's gonna be so much more waiting ahead of us when I was prepared to have him here first this summer, then next year but now God knows when it will happen.
I'm scared that almost 3 years of waiting turns out to have been for nothing.
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