I'm a little freaked out

[AvaLouise]

So, me and my SO were texting last night and being all cute, but then he said something along the lines of "I imagine us living together and starting a family together," and that was just kind of a red flag for me I dunno. First off, I'm 16, (he's 20) and I don't plan on anything serious like that til I'm at least done with college (which won't be for a while as I hope to attend Vet school). Also, I'm not one of those people who looks at my relationship and thinks, oh boy this will last forever! Because I know relationships end and its just something I expect. It's not that I don't love him, because I do, but I'm just afraid he's taking this way too fast.

[snow_girl]

I don't think its a red flag really. He's 20, people in their 20s get married and stuff. Maybe he is at a different stage of life then you. Talk to him about it.

[ST25]

No offense, but are you SURE you're ready to be in a committed relationship with him right now? It seems like you look in any direction to just jump out of it when there is a time something serious comes up.

Just give him a talk about it, tell him that it's going to fast for you. I'm sure he'll understand that much.

[lademoiselle]

Nah, I wouldn't say it's a red flag, just a sign that he's serious about you! As the others said though, let him know you aren't ready to think that far ahead right now. And there's nothing wrong with feeling that way - the idea of settling down never crossed my mind at 16, but fast forward four years and it's a different story

[Zephii]

It's normal to day dream, he's not saying he wants to rush in and do it all right now Just he can see this going somewhere.

[MissVampyxo]

I think he was just saying that to be sweet and to let you know that he does love you. If he brings it up again, or if it continues to bother you just talk to him about it. I don't think it's something you should be afraid of and run out on him because of saying that. It would be better you tell him how you feel rather than always get worried and iffy about you two whenever he brings it up.

[hrp2007]

Your 16, your mindset will change a lot over the next few years, just give him a talk if you feel it's going too fast.

[Kristin91]

Just talk to him about how you're feeling. Communication is key in an LDR. Let him know that you're not really thinking about that stage in your life right now and see what he says. He probably doesn't want to rush into it either, but it's probably on his mind. I know for my SO he's said stuff like that, but he's also said he can't guarantee where we'll be in 5 years because relationships do change. He's at that age where he probably knows people who are getting engaged.

[Softy]

I understand that you may be a lil surprised by that.
And yes, I agree that most would think you are too young to get married ( I personally think it's too young, but that's another topic).

I don't think you should panic, I think it's just his way to say that he really cares for you.
I don't think he rly rly wants to get married like now.
He just likes you and he wants to stay with you for a long while, that's what I think it is.

My bf said to me last month 'I hope someday you will become my wife'.
My bf is 23 and while I am ready to get married, I want to close the distance and live with him for a while before we could even considered getting married.
So I took this as a token of affection and him trying to say: 'Hey I rly rly love you!' Rather than an actual 'getting married' thing.

So no worries : )
You guys take ur time and enjoy being together.
And if he talks about it again, just say 'its cool but know that I'm not rdy for gettin married for a few more years'

cheers

[Black_Halloween]

You sure you're ready for a relationship? He was trying to be sweet and you're freaking out over nothing. .-.

[Sora1101]

Just talk to him about it, it could be he was just day dreaming, I mean the way I look at it is if you don't see yourself staying with someone for the long haul, even if it's 10 years down the road then you aren't with the right person or should be dating.

[ThePiedPiper]

I can understand why you'd feel that way. You love him but you want to remain practical and realistic, and you also want to make sure he knows where your own priorities are, i.e. on completing vet school and how you want to get through some college, if not all of it, before settling down and getting married. It's not unreasonable to be nervous about the possibility of your priorities not matching up. However, I do think he meant it harmlessly and as a way of saying he's serious about ya. I would sit down and talk to him about it and explain that, while you're flattered and you look forward to what your relationship has to bring, you also want to make sure he's aware of where you stand on the idea of marriage and starting a family and that's that you want to get through school first. That's where I would start.

[Belle]

I can understand why you'd feel that way. You love him but you want to remain practical and realistic, and you also want to make sure he knows where your own priorities are, i.e. on completing vet school and how you want to get through some college, if not all of it, before settling down and getting married. It's not unreasonable to be nervous about the possibility of your priorities not matching up. However, I do think he meant it harmlessly and as a way of saying he's serious about ya. I would sit down and talk to him about it and explain that, while you're flattered and you look forward to what your relationship has to bring, you also want to make sure he's aware of where you stand on the idea of marriage and starting a family and that's that you want to get through school first. That's where I would start.

Similar to what I was going to say especially after the previous comments... I don't think you're over reacting at all, I just think you might have misunderstood what he meant. If I was in your position and I thought my SO was being serious about getting married, I'd freak out too!!! Its important that he understands were you stand because your career is obviously important to you and you're really young. As long as he just meant it as a way to show how serious his affection is and as a
"one day" type of thing, then its all ok =3. If he meant it as a serious thing he wants to do sooner than later (which I doubt by the way you said it) then maybe you should talk and try to get on the same page.

[AvaLouise]

You sure you're ready for a relationship? He was trying to be sweet and you're freaking out over nothing. .-.

lol, freaking out over nothing? Honestly, shut up. The fact that this is coming from a guy I've dated for less than half a year is a little much. I have every right to be a little weirded out. Unless you're one of those annoying girls who gets mad if your boyfriend DOESN'T want to marry you after a week of dating, and then I could understand why you'd think I'm not "ready" for a relationship. Just because I'm not some bimbo who's ready to just jump on the wedding wagon at sixteen years old doesn't mean I'm not ready for anything.

But to everyone else who says they understand, thank you. I get that he was just showing that he really cares about me. And it was sweet, but just a bit much for me. I'm not the girl who wants to be showered in flowers and presents and sweet things all the time, so what could seem sweet to everyone else is just a bit overwhelming for me lol.

[ST25]

Honestly? I don't really think he meant it as in 'Oh I wanna marry you so badly, let's do it right now!' It was probably his way of saying 'You are the ideal girl for me.' Because who wouldn't want to marry their ideal partner? XD