hi guys <3
i could really use some advice on this topic. it's been source of great stress for me in the past few months and it's one of the reasons i'm NOT looking forward to my possible future in UK.
basically: my mom in law is a control freak, she's admitted this to me. i met her for the first time after being with my SO for a year and a half. so, she was NEVER a part of our relationship. i met her, realised she's not the type of person i'm gonna get along with, so we never met again. until i got pregnant in May/June. we met up a couple of times. i thought she'd suddenly experienced a change of heart and was really touched at how nice she was being. specially coz i've no family in UK.
i was wrong. all she cared/cares about, is the kid in my belly. doesn't give a crap about me. i'm just a means to an end. the couple of times we did meet after i got pregnant, she offended me quite a few times.
then ensues the fiasco holiday in my country with my SO and his mom who joined us for 2 wks with a friend. i was pregnant, morning sickness at its best, hardly eating, some trouble with a family member and top it all off with the mother in law from hell (emotional blackmailing, lotsa drama). but thank God for my family, who were just being absolutely patient and loving towards my SO and his mom.
i should mention that my SO was a changed person whilst his mom was in the country with us. a person i didn't recognise.
it was just too much and i felt no support from him.
my SO knows all about my feelings regarding his mom. but he defends her by saying she doesn't mean the 'offensive' things she says and that's just her sense of humour. ... (i don't buy that).
but now she's emotionally cornered him and insists she wants to be a part of the child's life and he obviously wants to give her what she wants.
i should add:
other than a forwarded text message that she sent to her friends in my country, and my Dad and myself, i have not heard from her since she left on the 8th of Sept. 2012. not a single text or email to ask how i'm doing. i haven't bothered keeping in touch either.
also, my SO and her were never particular close prior to my pregnancy. things only changed when she realised she's gonna have a grandchild, so she kinda jumped right into the middle of our relationship in an attempt to control.
the BOTTOMLINE is: i do not want her to be a part of my or my kid's life. she's fake and has no respect for me whatsoever. so, i don't see why she deserves to be around my child given she treats the unborn child's mother like crap. in front of my SO and my parents, she acts all nice but when we're alone, that's when she insults/offends me or makes unreasonable requests.
so, i'm not looking forward to my possible future in UK because he wants her to be a part of it all of a sudden, coz of our soon-to-be-born child.
i'll finish with this small but important point: when i was younger, i was in a relationship where ex's mother drove me near to depression. i was very young and naive and didn't know how to handle being pushed around. but that stopped eventually. now, i don't take crap from just anyone. the only thing is, i love my SO dearly and don't wanna cause him unhappiness.
please help? any input would be most appreciated and i apologise for the really long post.
thanks guys <3
i could really use some advice on this topic. it's been source of great stress for me in the past few months and it's one of the reasons i'm NOT looking forward to my possible future in UK.
basically: my mom in law is a control freak, she's admitted this to me. i met her for the first time after being with my SO for a year and a half. so, she was NEVER a part of our relationship. i met her, realised she's not the type of person i'm gonna get along with, so we never met again. until i got pregnant in May/June. we met up a couple of times. i thought she'd suddenly experienced a change of heart and was really touched at how nice she was being. specially coz i've no family in UK.
i was wrong. all she cared/cares about, is the kid in my belly. doesn't give a crap about me. i'm just a means to an end. the couple of times we did meet after i got pregnant, she offended me quite a few times.
then ensues the fiasco holiday in my country with my SO and his mom who joined us for 2 wks with a friend. i was pregnant, morning sickness at its best, hardly eating, some trouble with a family member and top it all off with the mother in law from hell (emotional blackmailing, lotsa drama). but thank God for my family, who were just being absolutely patient and loving towards my SO and his mom.
i should mention that my SO was a changed person whilst his mom was in the country with us. a person i didn't recognise.
it was just too much and i felt no support from him.
my SO knows all about my feelings regarding his mom. but he defends her by saying she doesn't mean the 'offensive' things she says and that's just her sense of humour. ... (i don't buy that).
but now she's emotionally cornered him and insists she wants to be a part of the child's life and he obviously wants to give her what she wants.
i should add:
other than a forwarded text message that she sent to her friends in my country, and my Dad and myself, i have not heard from her since she left on the 8th of Sept. 2012. not a single text or email to ask how i'm doing. i haven't bothered keeping in touch either.
also, my SO and her were never particular close prior to my pregnancy. things only changed when she realised she's gonna have a grandchild, so she kinda jumped right into the middle of our relationship in an attempt to control.
the BOTTOMLINE is: i do not want her to be a part of my or my kid's life. she's fake and has no respect for me whatsoever. so, i don't see why she deserves to be around my child given she treats the unborn child's mother like crap. in front of my SO and my parents, she acts all nice but when we're alone, that's when she insults/offends me or makes unreasonable requests.
so, i'm not looking forward to my possible future in UK because he wants her to be a part of it all of a sudden, coz of our soon-to-be-born child.
i'll finish with this small but important point: when i was younger, i was in a relationship where ex's mother drove me near to depression. i was very young and naive and didn't know how to handle being pushed around. but that stopped eventually. now, i don't take crap from just anyone. the only thing is, i love my SO dearly and don't wanna cause him unhappiness.
please help? any input would be most appreciated and i apologise for the really long post.
thanks guys <3
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