My SO finally contacted me over the weekend and apologized for not keeping in contact with me better. We didn't have an argument about it and there wasn't any yelling or angry voices I had expressed my frustration with the situation and while I understood he was settling in and busy with a new work position and thus left him alone other than 2 very short emails asking if everything was okay, it still was uncool that he couldn't bother to text once or twice or email back. He acknowledged it and promised to be more proactive with communication. So far so good and it hasn't been brought up since.
Today, we got into an argument via email. Here is some brief background information. My SO is currently enrolled in an online degree program and has about 1 year left. Since he was going on the road with work, he needed a laptop computer to do his schoolwork. He couldn't rely on having time or access to the website through work terminals. So, he bought a used older Macbook online through ebay the week before he left. It has all the software he needed to do his work and a camera and wi-fi built in. He didn't have it checked out or scanned for viruses or anything nor did he install any kind of anti-virus software. Now, my SO is also an internet junkie. He will go on any website and almost click on anything that he can see that interests him. If it's not the computer, it's on his I-phone or Ipad. Sometimes he is using two devices at the same time to look up stuff. Currently, he is relying on public wi-fi spots to connect to the internet via the hotel system or places such as Starbucks or other public retail places.
Well, today, two of his email accounts got infected and started sending out spam email to a bunch of contacts saying the email and embedded link were from him and the subject line was his email addy. I myself got two emails from his account on two of my accounts and was the one who alerted him because were were email chatting. He blew up at me and instantly accused me of hacking into his emails and doing this. He must have asked/accused me 3 or 4 times. I denied it because I didn't do and don't have any interest in hacking into his email, certainly not to send an virus ladden email to random contacts including myself. I tried to explain to him that he doesn't have any protection on his computer, is using very unsecured internet connections and is clicking all over the internet. I also sent him links to a dozen articles about the recent malware attacks Apple and apple computers have been encountering in the last week. It's all over the news. He still insisted it was me and I am hell bent on breaking in and wanting his personal info and "trying to destroy his life."
At that point, I blew up. I didn't curse him out or anything but I did use an angry tone. I basically told him I was very upset and didn't appreciate being repeatedly accused of doing something when I told him I didn't, never had done it in the past to indicate I would, nor was there any proof such as log in info to show I accessed the accounts from my location and his problem was a result of his lack of security on his computer and wi-fi access points and his browsing habits. As for trying to get his personal info, the only thing I asked him was were he is living because, hell, I am his girlfriend of 5 years. I don't think it's crazy or uncalled for to know where my boyfriend lives. I had planned on sending him a package of his favorite cupcakes from a bakery his loves that delivers nationwide so he would have a little sweet piece of home. He replied to me asking why I was being mean and ugly to him and it went back and forth.
I don't know if he just didn't get why I would be offended or upset or if he is playing dumb at this point. He didn't even apologize. He just pretended nothing was wrong and he didn't do anything wrong and his emails to me for the rest of the day were terse and distant. And that's where we stand. I still feel hurt and an not sure when or if I will get a phone conversation with him anytime soon. I haven't ever had to resolve such a conflict over LD when I can't just go to there person face to face to iron everything out. Advice?
Today, we got into an argument via email. Here is some brief background information. My SO is currently enrolled in an online degree program and has about 1 year left. Since he was going on the road with work, he needed a laptop computer to do his schoolwork. He couldn't rely on having time or access to the website through work terminals. So, he bought a used older Macbook online through ebay the week before he left. It has all the software he needed to do his work and a camera and wi-fi built in. He didn't have it checked out or scanned for viruses or anything nor did he install any kind of anti-virus software. Now, my SO is also an internet junkie. He will go on any website and almost click on anything that he can see that interests him. If it's not the computer, it's on his I-phone or Ipad. Sometimes he is using two devices at the same time to look up stuff. Currently, he is relying on public wi-fi spots to connect to the internet via the hotel system or places such as Starbucks or other public retail places.
Well, today, two of his email accounts got infected and started sending out spam email to a bunch of contacts saying the email and embedded link were from him and the subject line was his email addy. I myself got two emails from his account on two of my accounts and was the one who alerted him because were were email chatting. He blew up at me and instantly accused me of hacking into his emails and doing this. He must have asked/accused me 3 or 4 times. I denied it because I didn't do and don't have any interest in hacking into his email, certainly not to send an virus ladden email to random contacts including myself. I tried to explain to him that he doesn't have any protection on his computer, is using very unsecured internet connections and is clicking all over the internet. I also sent him links to a dozen articles about the recent malware attacks Apple and apple computers have been encountering in the last week. It's all over the news. He still insisted it was me and I am hell bent on breaking in and wanting his personal info and "trying to destroy his life."
At that point, I blew up. I didn't curse him out or anything but I did use an angry tone. I basically told him I was very upset and didn't appreciate being repeatedly accused of doing something when I told him I didn't, never had done it in the past to indicate I would, nor was there any proof such as log in info to show I accessed the accounts from my location and his problem was a result of his lack of security on his computer and wi-fi access points and his browsing habits. As for trying to get his personal info, the only thing I asked him was were he is living because, hell, I am his girlfriend of 5 years. I don't think it's crazy or uncalled for to know where my boyfriend lives. I had planned on sending him a package of his favorite cupcakes from a bakery his loves that delivers nationwide so he would have a little sweet piece of home. He replied to me asking why I was being mean and ugly to him and it went back and forth.
I don't know if he just didn't get why I would be offended or upset or if he is playing dumb at this point. He didn't even apologize. He just pretended nothing was wrong and he didn't do anything wrong and his emails to me for the rest of the day were terse and distant. And that's where we stand. I still feel hurt and an not sure when or if I will get a phone conversation with him anytime soon. I haven't ever had to resolve such a conflict over LD when I can't just go to there person face to face to iron everything out. Advice?
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