Did i just read that right?

[abc123]

There are a lot of benefits to being married if you're in the (American) military, like housing privileges and extra pay, so I kind of understand his intentions. However, since you guys seem to be pretty serious he should really get a divorce. With marriage come other legal obligations. In many states he would be considered the legal father of any baby his wife had now, for example. Just a thought

[Louise_B]

There are a lot of benefits to being married if you're in the (American) military, like housing privileges and extra pay, so I kind of understand his intentions. However, since you guys seem to be pretty serious he should really get a divorce. With marriage come other legal obligations. In many states he would be considered the legal father of any baby his wife had now, for example. Just a thought

I see your point! and i never thought about the baby situation LOL. But your right we are serious and this is why when he gets back from Nebraska he will be filing for the Divorce

[Verojoon]

To be honest, I'm still not divorced. I can't afford it for one. I'm really struggling as it is... I wish I had done it sooner, though, because my ex and I are finally getting along and he's finally not acting like a bitter asshole trying to sabotage my happiness... (this is VERY important since we do have children...) but now I worry that when I serve him the paper, it will open the bitterness right back up again. (I want to point out that we do have a formal written up separation agreement with witness signatures... to me the rest is just a court legality...) Anyways, as I'm entering some massive financial difficulties, I might have a good opportunity to initiate the divorce with it being less like a slap in his face (and a giant reminder that I left him) since I would be doing it to protect him financially...

[Louise_B]

now I worry that when I serve him the paper, it will open the bitterness right back up again..

Well, i hope this doesnt happen! i think its unfair when stuff like that happens and totally not called for!. I don't have a problem with my SO still being married. because i know it was over a long long time ago! And they are seperated i remember him telling me, So it is only a piece of paper he needs to sign.

I hope every works out for you Verojoon i really do.

[garnet]

There are absolutely excuses that are completely valid. Mine don't belong on a public message board, but I don't doubt for one second that my reasons aren't legit, and the right thing to do. The only thing to do if I have a heart at all. Sorry, that sounds cryptic, but I suppose anyone that knows my story well could figure it out anyway.

Sorry Louise, wasn't planning to jump in here.

[abc123]

I see your point! and i never thought about the baby situation LOL. But your right we are serious and this is why when he gets back from Nebraska he will be filing for the Divorce

As long as its in the planning, that's great the only reason I brought the baby thing up is because it just happens to a guy my fiancé works with, it's pretty messed up...
Can't wait to find out if he's really planning on proposing so exciting!