broken up

[jeenapp]

If you're intent on saving this, then have fun not ever having any friends of the opposite sex. Because it won't stop at this guy no matter how much he tries to justify it.

honestly i hardly have friends of the opposite sex and it doesnt bother me, i have a few mutual friends with my SO but i like my girl mates and am happy with the friends i have 4
but i still wont be able to save this unless i can give him a reason for why i didnt tell him about what i did

[ThePiedPiper]

honestly i hardly have friends of the opposite sex and it doesnt bother me, i have a few mutual friends with my SO but i like my girl mates and am happy with the friends i have 4
but i still wont be able to save this unless i can give him a reason for why i didnt tell him about what i did

Well it won't stop with your male friends, either. Wait until he starts getting pissy about your female ones, as well. I don't think anyone here is going to help provide you with ways to fix an abusive relationship. His punishing you isn't going to make him love you, neither is you rolling over and taking it. He does not love you. He does not want you. He misses having someone to control, not you, and I'm sorry, but that's the blunt truth. You don't tell someone you love to kill themselves, you don't curse at them, you don't flip your shit because they were going to meet up with a male friend. You did nothing wrong and no one here is going to tell you you did, either. Whether or not you want to see if he's an asshole, that's up to you, but don't expect us to try and fix a relationship where you could easily end up battered. :/

[loneliestgirl]

Tell him that you didn't tell him because he is not your Father nor is he your master/owner. Does he tell you about every single person he sees and talks to?

[Chris516]

its not a mutual friend, he was my friend from years before id started this relationship
and my SO has told me that he doesnt like this friend coz of the inappropriate things he used to say to me when he was joking around which i understand is a reason why he shouldnt like my friend
oh right, so sorry to hear she almost died. i understand my SO's reasons for not wanting me to talk to the guy and would give up talking to him to save the relationship, but my SO wants me to give him a reason why i didnt tell him about planning to see the guy in the first place and i dont know what to tell him but i want to give him a reason so that theres a chance we could still be together

Yes, I now remember, that is was someone you knew prior to the relationship. I am sorry that I forgot that part. I apologize.

Your 'friend' saying things in a joking manner, I can sort of see why your SO wouldn't like him.

As to the part about you not telling your SO, that could be looked at two ways:

1. You didn't see a need to tell him, because nothing 'secretive' was going to happen

2. Just as you didn't see a need to tell him, he equally needs to learn to trust you.

But keep in mind, were your SO to do the same thing with another girl, you shouldn't get all jealous on him, and learn to trust him at the same time.

[ThePiedPiper]

Wait, your friend wasn't still making inappropriate comments, no? I thought you said "used to" as in in the past.

[jeenapp]

no my friend stopped making inappropriate comments

but you guys were right, last night i went to see him to talk and try and fix it and he said the only way i could show im sorry was get on my knees and beg then delete all the male contacts off my phone and fbc and never talk to a guy again and never go out again and tell him everything i do and tell both of our parents what ive done and how ive wronged him and then he might think about maybe being friends or getting back together with me and he said that if we're together he will never be as nice as he has been in the past and he'll make my life hell and he probably will never be able to marry me coz he wishes he'd never met me and wasted the last 2 years with me and so he might go back to his ex and if we did get back together he'd probably cheat on me and never tell me

so after he said all that and i hesitated about still being with him he said i cant really be sorry for what ive done or id do all of that for him

i know it was stupid of me to want to still be with him but its coz i love him so much

[Ejoriah]

What a jerk. A controlling, manipulative, egocentric jerk that thinks he's God's gift to women, from the sounds of it. You're so much better off without him... trust me you'll look back on this and wonder what you ever saw in this guy!

[LadyDaemon]

Ok,I usually try to keep my posts PG-13. But I have one word for you about him and that is fucktard. You dodged a massive bullet with him and you deserve so much better then that and for future reference,abuse doesn't equal love. Some women seem to somehow equate the two. Don't do it.

[Chris516]

What a jerk. A controlling, manipulative, egocentric jerk that thinks he's God's gift to women, from the sounds of it. You're so much better off without him... trust me you'll look back on this and wonder what you ever saw in this guy!

Calling him a 'jerk', was just too nice. He is definitely controlling, manipulative, and egocentric.

He is a bombastic pain in the (pick your favorite adjective to describe the guy...lol)!!!!

[Rugger]

no my friend stopped making inappropriate comments

but you guys were right, last night i went to see him to talk and try and fix it and he said the only way i could show im sorry was get on my knees and beg then delete all the male contacts off my phone and fbc and never talk to a guy again and never go out again and tell him everything i do and tell both of our parents what ive done and how ive wronged him and then he might think about maybe being friends or getting back together with me and he said that if we're together he will never be as nice as he has been in the past and he'll make my life hell and he probably will never be able to marry me coz he wishes he'd never met me and wasted the last 2 years with me and so he might go back to his ex and if we did get back together he'd probably cheat on me and never tell me

so after he said all that and i hesitated about still being with him he said i cant really be sorry for what ive done or id do all of that for him

i know it was stupid of me to want to still be with him but its coz i love him so much

That is abuse. Take it from someone who was with a guy like that, It only gets worse. You dodged a bullet girly. Delete his number, block his FB and get on with your life. I Promise you will find someone better and more worthy of your time